Newbies Nest

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Greetings Nesters,

Sunny & warming up again in these parts. I knew the nice weather wouldn’t last forever, haha!!

Belle, sounds like the event went very well! I’m happy for you.
My grandson has reportedly been staying up most nights playing games on the internet with friends, not a big surprise really. I know the older one has been doing the same thing for a few years. School is starting up again on the 29th so waking up to an early alarm will be shocking for them, Lol

Hello to all & wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

Lav

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

Quick check in for me tonight.

Belle - sounds like a good evening at your work party. Hope you enjoyed your day off today!

Ava - Magnus is a cutie. Can we see a pic after the grooming appt? Or maybe I missed it. Sounds like your physio is working if it's challenging your muscles like that. I'll look forward to hearing how next week with pilates goes.

Lav - any luck at the Natural Food store? Our warm (hot) weather has returned too. Ugh!


Happy almost-Friday everyone!

[Slo]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good morning peeps!

I made your zucchini pancakes, Lav, and they were good! Now I have something I can make for vegetarian (pescatarian) daughter, to help fortify her after the birth of Huxley.

I bought a new bike yesterday! It’s not a color that I like (black), but it fits me like a glove, and that’s what’s important. So I will give up my childhood dream of having a pretty light blue bike…even though there was a beautiful light blue bike right next to it, but it wasn’t my size, and there were no more at any of their stores. Just a fluke that they had a Felt in stock, and I got the sense that it still might not have fit as well as the other one even in the right size…so a Trek FX1 it is. Function over form. I enjoyed whizzing through my new neighborhood on it!

[Slo]

Re: Newbies Nest

Belle, absolutely fascinating that the work party was alcohol-free! It sounds like a well-planned event that was designed to be fun for everyone. I like the time-frame too: they could network and enjoy a business-related get-together for a few hours without having to sacrifice sleep and an excessive amount of time.
Interesting that your boss says he has never had a drop of alcohol in his life. So unusual…

Interesting too, Belle, about your family history of heavy drinkers despite your parents not being so. My parents weren’t big drinkers either, but I can deduce that one grandpa was alcoholic, and the other grandpa coped with life with excessive drinking, during the hard years at least.

Ava, that Magnus does look ready for a haircut!
And even if you feel you didn’t accomplish a lot this month, at least you got to rest & heal.

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

Sunny & warm as promised but the weekend sounds like it’s going to be real hot & humid again, ugh.

Wags, I did find what we’re looking for & sent you a PM last night but it seems to have disappeared. Sent another one just now & that disappeared too. Don’t know what’s going on with that.
The current price is $66, pricey but good pain relief is priceless for me I think I’ll try a new message to you.

Slo, glad you like the zucchini cakes, they are delicious just as they are but can be jazzed up any way you like
Congrats on the new bike, sounds like fun!

Hello to everyone & wishing a safe night in the nest for all!

Lav

[BelleGirl]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hello Saturday, nesters!

Have a busy day getting last minute things for daughter's dorm move in tomorrow. She is not thrilled about going back so moving in at the last minute. But she is going and committed to keeping her job at the mental hospital on Fridays. It is on her how to get to work. She can take the metro, then uber the final couple of miles or so. Time for her next step in adulthood.

I picked her up from work last night and she talked about the kids she works with (all inpatient mental health) and so much of it is heartbreaking that I was nearly crying. Daughter said that she is an empath, but has to keep that in check when working with the kids. They are KIDS...and there for all sorts of reasons. One little boy, age 7, hugs his stuffed lion every time he is in bed. He was crying and wanting to see his mom yesterday, and just like that a little stuffed animal peered around the door and it was his mom there for a visit. I also don't know how these parents do it. They are trying their best to get the help their child needs. There are alot of cases of self harm and suicide risk. Heartbreaking that that can happen at such a young age. Some cases are foster children whose lives have really been messed up. And some are kids whose parents don't want to deal with them (like the dad that doesn't want child to come home because child wants to transition from female to male).

Makes me count my blessings with my kids. Though I am getting nervous about daughter going back to campus, and that son won't finish his NY fashion week garments in time...at least they are mentally stable (though my daughter does have some anxiety issues) and are on their way to adulthood.

Slo...great about the bike! I had an almost 30 year old Trek bike that was stolen out of my garage a few years ago. Son has a nice bike and will pump up the tires for me so I can use it when the weather cools. Such a great way to experience nature.

Need to make another run to JoAnn fabrics for some bias tape for son. Glad I am up and not hungover!

Enjoy your weekend, all!

[lifechange]

Re: Newbies Nest

morning Nesters..
this is the same thing i posted in the army.. i'm not sure if you read over there and it's too much to post twice.. but i want to keep up in the Nest as well cause it is the best place for me to post my plans for the day.. and i want to hear what's going on with you when you write.. and there are still a couple of "Newbies" here..
i'm happy to see you're doing so well, [MENTION=3200]Belle[/MENTION].. i'm with you.. i will NEVER give up and i am getting closer, even though i keep making mistakes..

""it is a lovely, cool Sunday morning and after the past couple of shitty days i feel hopeful again.. it's taking me a decade to figure out my way out, but i'm getting closer, mainly in that i'm losing the shame in being an alcoholic.. there's no getting around it, i've proven to myself a million times that no matter what, if i drink i'll be in exactly the same place i left off.. even worse. i think that having a mother who was such a hard core drunk kept me in "denial" for a long time.. never drank like she did, don't want to be in the same boat as her, etc.. but that is the direction i'm headed if i continue to drink. i know that not drinking alcohol has to be the one non negotiable.. it really worked to come here every day, to set out my plan in the Nest mornings, to come back in the evening to check in and confirm that i'd done it, to talk about problems, to carry around my notebook and jot things down.. at some point i started slacking, my short term memory set in.. i'm not sure what my missing link is.. but i do think it's positive that i'm not staying away.. that's a little shift, not disappearing for months, either say f*** it or thinking i'll manage on my own.. i'll hear tomorrow about whether or not the therapist has time to fit me in.. i do think that could help as well..
thank you all for continuing to support me.. i'm pretty sure it's frustrating to keep trying to help someone who won't be helped.. i'll definitely remember your patience when i get to the point that i can help someone get through their addiction!!:love:""

[lifechange]

Re: Newbies Nest

plan today...
brekkie then heading to the gym with my guy.. then probably a lazy day.. cooking something, reading.. helping my daughter get ready for school beginning again..
tonight i'll be on my own so i'll check in here.. i'm watching/listening to a good podcast about addiction and getting well.. will continue to listen to that.

wishing everyone a nice Sunday..xx

[available]

Re: Newbies Nest

Evening nesters

Belle, that is so good that everyone enjoyed themselves without al at a party. Unheard of really but an excellent idea. I a so glad i decided to foster, there are other things you can do when you sign up to them, like take peoples animals to vets, do house checks etc. They do give you a dog that suits your animals that you have. Mags has settled in really well but i think Bob has overwhelmed him. My daughter has taken Bob to my sons and Mags is much more relaxed. He is up for adoption and i suppose i will be told if anyone is interested. He is a beautiful boy, might offer any adoptees Bob instead ha ha.

Slo, a new bike, go you. I love the vintage looking bikes. i remember the sissy bar on my bike when i was a child and the big long bike seat with flowers on it, 3 gears (dont think they worked). those were the days. I hope you have some interesting rides in your new area.

Lav, loved you finding a watermelon, bet that tasted delicious. I am getting ready to plant seeds for spring which i might do tomorrow, the weather is warming up which is nice and the days are cool but sunny. i have been slowly weeding the garden and tonight put all of my seeds into order and labelled them. bought a labeller a couple of weeks ago and feel like a small child, everything has to be labelled ha ha.

LC, i remember coming on here and thinking OMG i dont drink as much as these people on here, i dont have a problem. Oh FFS, that is how our brains think. Once an addict always an addict i tell myself. sure i can have that one drink, not a problem in the world but i run the rest of the movie and it doesnt end well. I remember when my brother died, i told myself i would never get as bad as he was and i was certainly heading in that direction rapidly. I know he would be very proud of me for doing what he sadly could not. You will get there, use all of your tools and you will gather more along the way.

Wags, just for you and everyone, this is Mags after his haircut. I think she gave me a different dog except his underbite gives it away.

at groomers 18th august 2022.jpg

One more week of holidays to go and then back to the grind. i do feel a lot more human now which is good. Cant wait to meet G and Steady this Friday for a catch up.

take care xx

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

Apparently I forgot to check in yesterday, haha! Not extremely busy or anything so there’s no reason haha!!
It’s been warmer the past two days & now there’s rain moving in for tonight & tomorrow that we really need after a dry spell.

Belle, empaths are drawn to careers in helping people, nursing, EMTs, etc. we really have to be careful to not get pulled into their dramas. I stayed away from psych nursing for. That very reason. Frankly they used to drive me nuts & got. Under my skin. Just so your daughter keeps a firm boundary around herself, she’ll be OK. Actually, as it turned out there were plenty of psych patients on the medical/surgical floors & ICU so staying was from them was pretty much impossible, Lol
Back to school activities are gearing up all around, My grandkids are busy with all that stuff too. It all gets done every year, somehow

LC, you’re sounded grounded & committed to your quit & that’s awesome. Stick to your plan & keep checking in with us!

Ava, isn’t it amazing what a simple haircut can do? Haha!!! Mags looks beautiful, someone will take him home.
Our son stopped by for a quick visit this afternoon & went home with. Two of the smaller watermelons that were found & three dozen eggs. No one ever leaves here empty handed

Hello to all & wishing a safe night in the nest for all!

Lav

[BelleGirl]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hello nesters,

Checking in on a Sunday evening. Husband took daughter to campus today because I know I could not deal with the amount of heavy bins and stuff. She and I went shopping yesterday for some last minute stuff, but it took hourrrssss. Her old roommate came to see her today and they went out somewhere together. Don't know much about new roommate but what I have heard from daughter sounds positive.

Ava, Mags is adorable. I wish I could pet and kiss that sweet little face. He looks like a teddy bear. I'm sure someone will give him a furever home soon! I wish I could!

Lav, I sure hope my daughter doesn't get involved in too much drama. At least there is a turnover in patients, I think the max time a kid spends there is 2 weeks...so she cannot get too invested. But I'm with you...I think they would drive me nuts.

Trying sirloin steaks in the air fryer for dinner. Apparently (from the recipes I've read) they do well air fried. We'll see.

I'm trying to velcro my butt to a twig in the nest so I don't stray too far.

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

Another quick check-in for me. Several busy days and not great sleep so I'm dragging a bit but hanging in there.

Looks like folks are checking in and doing at least ok.

Slo - congrats on the new bike! I hope you enjoy it a ton. And for sure fit is the most important aspect -- you would have regretted compromising in that area, especially just for color.

LC - great idea to post your plan for the day here.

Lav - Thank you SO much for your efforts at the store. I just answered your PM and included my phone number so we can text. That will probably be easier all the way around!


Hellos and waves everyone. Happy new weeks to you all!

[Slo]

Re: Newbies Nest

I have been very de-motivated and floundering. Have to get out of this funk…

Young daughter’s doctor appointment for this morning was just cancelled, so we are going to take a bike ride instead! Finally I’ll get moving.

I took my 13-year-old niece and 16-year-old nephew out for the day on Saturday; school clothes shopping with Grandma (my mother), and to Irish Fest so my nephew could see bagpipes in action, since he is interested in playing the bagpipes. It was a lot of driving and tiring but good. The kids liked it! I need to step up and help my little brother with his kids since he is so depressed & alcoholic since his wife died.
My mother ended up getting around to rejecting him too (he’s 10 years younger than me), in his turn; after I was out of the house. All four of us who looked like Dad (strawberry blonde hair and blue eyes) ended up being actively rejected by her, and subjected to all the techniques that narcissists use (devaluing, spreading false gossip, gaslighting, etc.). So now we four are all left struggling in life with alcoholism, suicide & suicidal ideation, depression, unable to trust others, etc.
Meanwhile, brown-eyed & brown-haired brother and sister are thriving in life, and don’t know what’s wrong with the rest of us! “They’re like your dad”, Mother says…yeah, because the same narc who destroyed our dad then destroyed us too, after she was done with him!
So I need to support my brother, by trying to support his kids. His preliminary hearing for his latest DUI is Sept. 1st, the day his three kids go back to school.

Anywho…happy Monday

[NoSugar]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, Nest. Thanks for all your kind notes about my mom's death. We had a very nice private service for her a week later in their home with all of the close family members present. The service itself was nice and much of the day was actually fun. My dad liked the slide show of over 200 photos of her I put together and now is able to watch it on the electronic frame they've had for years. I also made him pillows from 2 sweatshirts and 2 shirts she wore frequently (the shirts with buttons formed the backs so I could slip the pillows in) and pretty much drenched them in her cologne. He LOVES them and said that in case of fire, he'll grab them and run!

After that I spent a week with our son and his family. I think it was good to be around people and very busy - even if unsuccessful in my potty-training assignment.

I read what you had written in the Army thread, LC. The question you asked lead several people to write about their addiction experiences. It was very helpful for me to read those - I'd encourage any of you to go take a look at the posts in the Army thread over the last couple weeks. Reminders that we really are not weird, bad, or alone.

It's great to see everyone hanging in there - actually living the ups and downs. xx, NS

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good Monday evening Nesters,

We’re dodging rain & thunderstorms here today but that’s OK, it’s been a bit too dry lately.

Belle, glad your daughter is settled in with her new roommate. Hope it’s a good year for both of them.
As she matures she will decide whether or not she can handle being around extremely needy people all day. Caregivers of any type are subject to burnout - been there & done that myself.

Wags, glad you did get that last message I sent, haha. I’ve texted you so we can get this done. Hope your week is easier

Slo, you always seem to get quite a bit done regardless of motivation level :hug:
Remember it’s just natural for all of us to have those ups & downs in life. Turning your attention to your brother’s kids will be a blessing for them & for yo as well. I’m sorry your brother has fallen so hard but maybe he hit his bottom & will begin to heal now. At least his kids will be looked after while he works to get his act together. He’s lucky to have such a good sister.
A narcissistic parent can really screw up a family, mine was my dad. Hang in there, you’re doing great things!!

NS, glad the funeral went well for the family. Your dad is lucky to have you.
As far as the potty training assignment, oh boy haha! I’m glad that phase is long over with my grandkids although they really weren’t too bad. Keeps you on your toes!!!

Hello to all & wishing everyone a safe night in the nest for all!

Lav