Newbies Nest

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Greetings Nesters,

Finally have good news - the new heater arrives tomorrow, yay! Now that we’ve been thru the coldest weather in 33 years around here the new heater arrives, LOL/ Grateful for it anyway

G, another South American trip on your radar, cool! I’m sure you will find something fun & interesting to do there while playing some gigs

Wags, we have a strong group of women here (and G of course) & we know when it’s time to treat ourselves well. Families tend to sit back & kinda wait for things to get done. I’m known for opening my mouth & handing out assignments these days so I don’t have to doit all myself haha!! Keep that in mind before the holidays roll around again next year

Kensho, sorry your plans got messed up, annoying for sure. Hopefully you can make arrangements elsewhere before the winter is over.
I’d rather go to the dentist than tour another brewery or winery - been there & done that!

Belle, are you OK today?

Hello to all & wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!
Lav

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

Qucik check-in tonight. Hope everyone is doing well!

[available]

Re: Newbies Nest

Evening nesters

Kensho, i dont like xmas, i like that i get all four kids in one space but thats about it and mum. the crap to get to one day is ridiculous but everyone brings something and i provide the clean house that looks like WW3 hit it when they leave. my tree is a stick with my daughters star on it that she made when she was 6 (shes now 35). that is about the only tradition that we have. That sucks about your holiday, i hope you get your money back and maybe go somewhere else.

Belle, back on track and proud of you for fessing up and knowing that it was a good idea at the time but not now. I would have liked a drink on xmas day but i know the drill now and how badly it would end and the kids would knock the drink out of my hand as quick as i poured the drink. it appeals for about a minute and thats it thankfully. i do remember my first xmas sober (24 days) and one of the kids even wiped the table so i would not lick up the wine spilt, never been a table licker lol but they realised how hard it was for me. Each year got easier thankfully.

Wags, i think of everyone else also but i do think of me more. Hopefully 2023 is your year.

Lav, i have seen the winter storms over in the US and i bet your furnace would have been handy during the cold snap. Hope the outdoor cat became an indoor one.

G, good plan for 2023. I hope to lessen my workload but the heirachy certainly take their time in instigating it.

i have had a few quiet days, the covid tireds are still around which is annoying but now i can look after me. tomorrow i am giving blood and taking one of the fosters to the vets for their blood pressure check. No plans for new years, i will probably be looking after a fur baby or two.

How was your xmas Slo?

take care xx

[KENSHO]

Re: Newbies Nest

We drove through a blizzard last night! It was sprinkling rain at 5pm on my way to the neighboring town 30 mi. north, and at 10pm when we left, there was just a dusting of snow. By the time we got home at 11:30, there was 6"! Blowing, one-lane roads - it was treacherous! Stressful, but glad to be home.

AVA, so glad you are not a table licker. Those people have some problems....

Lav, I learn a lot from you. I'm getting better at handing out assignments. I used to get so upset and feel so sorry for myself that people didn't offer to help, or took more than they gave, but I'm learning that I have to ask - or just do less. Unfortunately, even good people take what they can get at times. It's my fault if I just sit there and stew vs. solving it. Something I learned in sobriety - taking care of myself.

Hi Wags.

I read a long article last night bashing "alternative sobriety sites". This author touted the effectiveness of the old-fashioned AA program, while calling some of the newer platforms "trendy", "gentrified", "cutesy" and "new-age". While AA may work very well for some, I really appreciate the growing sobriety movement and more evolved takes on quitting. There are some common threads, such as needing a support group, acceptance, etc. But I think we should explore all angles of our alcohol addiction as a culture. If it's trendy to quit, great! And I would not call our group "cutesy". It takes some toughness to call it quits and make it stick. The author also mocked the claims that "alternative sites" made with sober saying they have improvements in career, relationships and spirituality once quitting. I think that if you get sober and don't see your life change in profound ways, you have not done the work. Anyway, it made me mad

Ok, trying to get SOME work done today.

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

Well, we have a new heater in place ~ finally
The air temps are rising daily & we will see 60 degrees in New Years day. How odd is that especially after freezing ourselves over Christmas??

Wags, hope you are well & taking it easy t his week.

Ava, are you sure you want to donate blood while still recovering from Covid? Maybe you should wait a few weeks so you don’t get too wiped out.
We were lucky to just get rain while the people in new York state got huge amounts of snow.

Kensho, I learned my lesson after a lifetime of literally waiting hand & foot on everyone else & ignoring myself. It was never my intention to do that but just the way things worked out. But that’s all history now, I’ve changed & things have changed for the better. Always look out for yourself!!

Hello to all & wishing everyone a nice night in the nest!

Lav

[Slo]

Re: Newbies Nest

Maybe it was from holiday stuff. I get fairly cynical this time of year. For me, Christmas is doing all the things I am "supposed" to do, because most people do them - but I'm not really connecting with the cause. I always feel like I want that time back - the time stressing over getting enough and the right presents for everyone - wrapping them just in time for people to tear off the paper and throw it "away", and having obligatory social gatherings. It feels forced to me. I want to spend my time on meaningful things. I like the lights because it is so dark. But chopping down a tree to put in my living room, and all the other holiday hoops that are expected are bothering me.

YES. This is what I have disliked about Christmas for so long. Finally I have gained freedom from having to run the damn Christmas machine every year!

My Christmas was very nice, Ava. A chance to gather with family and see people I haven’t seen for awhile. Still wish I could take the edge off by drinking a bit though through it, but know it doesn’t work that way for me. I’d be focused on nothing but getting my next drink over & over again.

[Slo]

Re: Newbies Nest

I read a long article last night bashing "alternative sobriety sites". This author touted the effectiveness of the old-fashioned AA program, while calling some of the newer platforms "trendy", "gentrified", "cutesy" and "new-age". While AA may work very well for some, I really appreciate the growing sobriety movement and more evolved takes on quitting. There are some common threads, such as needing a support group, acceptance, etc. But I think we should explore all angles of our alcohol addiction as a culture. If it's trendy to quit, great! And I would not call our group "cutesy". It takes some toughness to call it quits and make it stick. The author also mocked the claims that "alternative sites" made with sober saying they have improvements in career, relationships and spirituality once quitting. I think that if you get sober and don't see your life change in profound ways, you have not done the work. Anyway, it made me mad .

AA is a cult, and an outdated one at that. Thankfully new groups are finally emerging!

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

Kensho & Slo - I've never had firsthand experience with AA specifically but what I know of it always seemed kinda "churchy" to me and I do not mean that in a good way. What I like about MWO and the Nest in particular is that there is no one way we're all supposed to do this.

Ava - Is it possible to wait a bit before you give blood since you're still feeling so run down? I'd hate to see a good deed make things any harder as you recover.

Lav - glad you got a new heater, even if the temps are looking very mild for the near future. We've warmed up a bit here too -- at least things aren't below freezing anymore.


Hellos and waves everyone. Only a few days left in 2022. Make the most of them doing all the good things (which does NOT include drinking of course!).

[KENSHO]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi Nest. To be clear, I do not think AA is wrong. I also don't think other approaches are wrong. The author didn't like that new approaches were "fashionable", and I think that is a wonderful thing! Let's make sobriety common, and see alcohol for what it is!

Took down the tree ornaments this morning. Again, never a fun task On to a stack of paperwork I haven't filed, and a mountain of laundry. Then entering my time billing. All good loose ends to tie up before we go visit friends. My husband called me a stick in the mud last night for not being enthusiastic about visiting them. After asking him to NOT call me names, I explained that I almost NEVER get time at my house where I'm not feeling completely overwhelmed with chores and tasks. I also explained that once next week hits, I will be under extreme pressure to produce a high volume of work for 4 projects. I just want to chill. But, I decided to go and socialize. I do tend to get stuck. I just encouraged him to see the other side instead of making me wrong for not wanting what he wants.

Slo, how was your Christmas in your new place? Sounds like you're enjoying making your own plans and doing what you want to do! Sounds great!

LAV, congrats on your new heater. Thank goodness you had a wood burning stove... what would you have done?

Best to everyone. Here's to a good close of 2022, and a fresh start to 2023.

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Greetings Nesters,

Temps in the mid 50’s today & there was sun too
Glad to have the new heat source in place for the next time it’s gets cold!

Slo, I’m with you on the amount of work it takes to run the Christmas machine, haha! Been there. Done it for decades, time for a rest.
My only experience with AA was as a college student. We were required to attend a meeting for an Alcohol Awareness course, part of our health ed requirements. The attendees were not happy we were there (I went with one other student), we stayed quiet. & completely out of the way. They saw us as some sort of invaders or something, geez it was uncomfortable. I really didn’t care much for their meeting, just wrote my report & forgot all about it Lol. If someone likes the meetings & helps them stay sober, that’s fine with me.

Wags, we’re in for big rain on the weekend which will probably mess up a lot of people’s plans. My plan is to stay home & stay safe

Kensho, so you’re a ‘stick in the mud’. Is that the same as a party pooper? Haha. Why should it even matter to him what you choose to do. I prefer to stay home & enjoy my peace, honestly. Spending quality time at home, alone sounds perfect to me. We can give the wood stove a rest now, it did it’s job.

Hello to all & wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

Lav

[Slo]

Re: Newbies Nest

You JUST were out socializing, Kensho; when you were out driving in that blizzard! It’s not like you haven’t been out in a long time! I’m sorry he called you that. Part of the attraction for him in getting together with the other couple is that it is a drinking opportunity for him. I’m sure you know that. So don’t let him fool you, about why he wants to be so “social”.

I do have a problem with AA. If someone likes the meetings and it helps them stay sober, then that’s fine with me too. But people end up being court-ordered to HAVE to attend those crazy meetings, and also people are forced to participate in AA in rehabs. There should be choices for how one wants to tackle getting sober. And that’s why we need to develop new programs, and why I’m thankful for people like Annie Grace who are doing just that; and for Smart Recovery and programs like that.

I’ve enjoyed getting a peek at the sun lately too. It was hiding most of December. And the blessedly balmy weather. It’s actually only in the 30s F, but feels balmy compared to what we’ve had.

[available]

Re: Newbies Nest

afternoon nesters

Lav and Wags, took it onboard and put off giving blood.

I did start on garage but taking my sweet time with that one. everything i dont want i am giving away. the kids have so much stuff stored so i am going to see if they want it or give it away. I also bought some vacuum seal bags so have squished my doonas and pillows to give me more storage. they are amazing! I did manage to go and get some potting mix so have been playing with my plants which badly need some love, just taking it easy.

Kensho, I dont think men realise what superwomen we are and how we need to look after ourselves. Now i am living by myself I just love it, I can do whatever I want, when i want and be there if needed.

I always said to myself if i didnt stop drinking after being on MWO i would go to AA. So glad i stopped drinking here as i didnt want to go to AA.

time for a cuppa and a bit more work, i have some work work to do as i was sick the week before i went on holidays. i have told the boss i will be taking time off for doing the work. Maybe i could start it in 2023. Lots of fireworks tonight and carl hates them so its going to be awful for him. Not sure about the other fur babies but hoping they will be ok.

take care xx

[STEADFAST]

Re: Newbies Nest

Quick but steady fly-by to wish all Nesters the very best for 2023 and beyond!

"See" you again soon, love,
Steady
:heartbeat:

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

Ava - congrats on getting the garage started, and on post-poning your blood donation. I hope the fireworks aren't too rough on Carl.

Kensho - glad you had such a self-respecting self-honoring response to your husband for his comment. Good for you!

Hellos and waves to Slo, Lav, Steady and everyone else in the nest. Hope 2023 brings us all many good things!

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Greetings Nesters,

About 6 hours left in 2022 & it’s pouring rain messing up all those outdoor festivities for people. I’m just staying put where it’s dry & warm

Slo, it’s funny how temps in the 30’s feel warm after dealing with a deep freeze.
Hope you have a comfy & warm evening.

Ava, like you I knew I didn’t want to go to AA so I am eternally grateful for MWO & everyone here. I’ve gotten my kids to remove most of. Their stuff over the years by threatening a garage sale haha!!
There are many hunters around here & also a gun club so my dog is not fazed by gunshots or anything that noisy. Hope Carl is OK.

Steady, good to see you & Happy New Year to you.

Wags, I hope you keep keep your assistant mum job for the coming year . Hope we have a great one!

Hello to all & wishing everyone a safe night in the nest & a very Happy & Healthy 2023!!!

Lav