Newbies Nest

[Battle_for_the_sun]

Re: Newbies Nest

Congrats on a week, Battle! What is Fan Art? Do you sell your pieces? I make too much stuff to use (or even give as gifts) but selling knitted or quilted things is tough because they would have to be so ridiculously expensive given the cost of materials (I like the 'good stuff') and time involved. Oh, well. I enjoy the designing and making.

Fan art is just art based on things you're a fan of - mines mostly portraits, if you're interested https://www.instagram.com/wishkahgraphics/

I don't have much time to do it now with PhD starting but I still try and do a bit over lunch breaks or when I'm settling down to bed at the end of the night. I picked up a commission not long ago because a colleague looked over my shoulder and liked my drawings haha

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Greetings Nesters,

We’re just back from a fun trip to Costco, Lol. Stocking up on cat & dog food as well as some stuff for us too

Battle, you’re doing great & I just love your art work! I just can’t imagine having the ability to do something like that. I hope it brings you happiness & some extra cash as well.
Keep up the good work in all areas!

Wags, the Philadelphia Eagle are heading to the Super bowl next month, oh boy! I will be busy doing something else that day as well haha!
Hope your week goes well for you & your students.

NS, there’s a lady that goes to a lot of the same craft fairs I do & often has her table set up right next to mine. She sells nothing but those sewn hot pads you use under a plate o r bowl in the microwave. I swear she brings what looks like thousands of them & she always sells a ton of them. It sure keeps her busy & she is probably only making a dollar or two on each. She just keeps going

Hello to all, especially those who haven’t checked in for a while (Belle, Pav, etc).
Wishing a safe night in the nest for all.

Lav

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

Battle - love your art! Thanks for sharing the link.

NS - I've been bundled up tight for dog walks here as well. Today was sunny but well below freezing. How is your pup doing? And how is your adjustment to retirement going?

Lav - I think we have a few of those hot pads (crocheted?)! Probably not the same maker though lol. Well, congrats to the Eagles on going to the superbowl. If I watch any of it, it'll just be for the commercials.


Starting off another good week here in Wagland. Work is awesome - busy enough but not crazy. We're installing a new kitchen faucet tomorrow (so exciting) and going hiking with a friend on Wed. So much to be grateful for.

Hellos and waves to everyone in the nest. If you're lurking please say hi!

[NoSugar]

Re: Newbies Nest

Your portraits are great, Battle! Pen and ink? I especially like the one of the musician with the colorful gloves. Thanks for sharing the link.

Life sounds good for you, Wags. I would find getting a new plumbing fixture to be pretty much a peak experience, especially if it is a big improvement over the current situation.

I've seen those quilted cozies, Lav. They are popular at craft shows. My problem is that I always want to be doing something new and different. When I used to make/sell jewelry and someone wanted a replica of something I'd already figured out and made (but was no longer available), I used to add a 'boredom surcharge' to the price.

Well, it is 6 degrees here today so I'm being a bad dog owner. We'll go out later when it hopefully makes it into double digits. Now that she's 2, our dog is much easier than the puppy days but she remains obsessed with finding and eating the weirdest things. We can't leave cloth or paper lying around or it will be shredded or gone. There is no litter in our neighborhood thanks to her trash collection and disposal habits! She must have an amazing intestinal system!!

[Battle_for_the_sun]

Re: Newbies Nest

So I screwed up, got stressed, got overwhelmed, got drunk (note to self: this is why everybody said -not to keep alcohol in the house- haha), woke up, felt bad about getting drunk, figured I'd made a mess of things already so why not really go nuts. So I got high at work (not to self part 2: this is why most drug addicts do not keep drugs in their bag 'just in case'). And now rather than studying I'm feeling sorry for myself. A real winner of a day for me haha.

Glad ya'll liked my doodles anyway, just like having something to do with my hands when I'm watching stuff, or in the queue for gigs as well. The band I lifted my username from (its an album/song title) are coming back around in June, so that's something to look forward to - the musician with the rainbow gloves plays bass for them NS. A lot of the drawings are of them actually - I followed them on tour for four dates last year and drew portraits in the queue for amusement.

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

Had some rain mixed with snow flurries today, still waiting for something big to happen in the weather dept., strange winter.

Battle, I’m sorry you got stressed & decided to go back to old habits. This is why we really need a strong plan so you can choose healthier ways to deal with those feelings & emotions. Dust yourself off & begin again, don’t stay in a downward spiral. You did real well & you can do it again! Post here before you decide to pick up again. Sometimes that’s enough distraction to change your thinking in the moment.

NS, our Golden Retriever was a regular vacuum around the house when the kids were growing up. He even went into their rooms & picked up dirty socks & underwear & delivered it to the laundry room haha!! He also took tinsel off the Christmas tree & you know where we found that, Lol. I can’t live without a dog or two in my life.

Wags, we’re on our 3rd kitchen faucet here & the house won’t be 20 years old until July. I swear nothing lasts anymore. Enjoy your new faucet. Glad your week is going well

Hello to all & wishing a safe night in the nest for all.
Lav

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

Battle - sorry to hear you decided to drink. As Lav said, you know what to do and you can do it. Get right back to getting Day One and get all the al out of your house.

Lav and NS - we're actually pretty excited about the new kitchen faucet. I was joking with my wife that you know you're a verified adult when plumbing fixtures are exciting


Hellos and waves everyone. Catch you all over the hump!

[Battle_for_the_sun]

Re: Newbies Nest

Evening all,

A quick check in from Day 1, dealing with a lot of regret and shame over the last couple of days, and cravings are fairly brutal - turns out reminding myself why I enjoyed drugs by getting high at work was a really really awful idea (who would have guessed?), at least the drinking had the decency to make me miserable and remind me why I wanted to quit haha. Jokes aside, I'm more determined than ever to make this work, doubling down on my plan and keeping out of temptation's way as best I can.

Wags - I got excited about a new sink drain not long ago, the landlord cheaped out pretty bad on fixtures and sittings, the entire thing became detached, a problem i didn't realise until i cleaned out the fish tank and emptied a ten litre bucket of water into a sink that had a hole where the pipe should be. Same week as that happened with my bathroom sink the cold tap on the kitchen sink stopped working - so I was running water in the bathroom and brushing my teeth in the kitchen. Can't blame a guy for getting a bit excited when it was all fixed haha.

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

Getting chilly here as the Arctic air moves in from the west, Brrrr! Grateful the new heater is working nicely.

Wags, it honestly doesn’t take much to make me happy & working fixtures in the house is right at the top of the list, haha!! Things like faucets may seem minor in the big picture but it matters to me Enjoy your brand new faucet.

Battle, good to see you getting right back on track. We use to talk a lot here about triggers & the importance of having a good plan in place. Whatever your drinking/using triggers are be sure to have a list of alternatives ready. Write them down, carry them with you. Call a friend or post on here if it helps. Wishing you the best! We used to have large fish tanks here & I know how funky that water gets, ugh.

Hello to all & wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!!

Lav

[TJAF]

Re: Newbies Nest

Battle, I went through multiple attempts to quit before the last one stuck. Most of us have gone through the same cycle. You aren't alone. The important thing is not to beat yourself up. Your addicted Brain loves self loathing, it makes it easier to convince you to give up. You're lucky to have a group of people here that aren't sitting in judgement. You'll find unquestioned support here.
Earlier you said you had a hard time thinking that you'll never drink again. In this early phase of your sobriety that's understandable. I promise you that there will be a time when you'll be ecstatic realizing you'll never drink again. Its an incredible feeling of freedom.
The last thing I think you should know about is Kindling, its something I learned about late and had I known about it earlier it may have saved me some tough times dealing with detox. When a person experiences detox and withdrawal repeatedly, the symptoms get more severe each time. The cycle of drinking and abstaining has had a detrimental effect on their body chemistry. The effect is known as kindling. Look it up it may help Keep at it! Fake it till you make it!

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

Battle - it sounds like you're getting your head back in the game, which is great. As TJAF said, you're in a place where we offer support, not judgment. I don't think there's a person here who hasn't slipped up or gotten in their own way.

Lav - yep, even doing dishes is more enjoyable with a great kitchen faucet!

TJAF - you described it so well - it IS incredibly freeing to know you'll truly never drink again. The hardest parts of quitting for many people are getting started and fighting off the temptations and self-doubts of the early days. Later into a solid quit, it's like it has a positive energy of its own that carries it for you.


Hellos and waves everyone!

[NoSugar]

Re: Newbies Nest

I wrote a post yesterday and must not have actually posted it!! Any, I hope you're back on track, Battle. I agree with TJ - no point in beating yourself up. Just because you've done something in the past (over and over and over) doesn't mean things will always be like that. You can change your thinking in an instant. Anytime you want! A thought isn't anything real - and it is up to you which of the 50K thoughts you have each day you choose to pay attention to. For example, I was a pretty shy kid most of my life and could see what I was missing out on because of that. I decided not to be shy in college and -just like that- I no longer was. When a thought to hold back or feel embarrassed popped into my mind, I just let it go and did the 'unshy' thing. I used the same technique to quit drinking. When I felt the urge to drink, I let that thought go (an urge is just the physical manifestation of a thought) and replaced it with 'but I don't drink' and forced myself to move on to the next better thing. Don't let those unreal thoughts take you where you don't want to go. You can do this. NS

[Battle_for_the_sun]

Re: Newbies Nest

Evening all

Well I've spent the day sick as all hell, I doubt its drinking/drug related as 48 hours surely isn't enough to kick off another round of withdrawals, I slept better than I was expecting but felt awful all day, just kept my headphones and kept my head down at work, glad to be home now.

Lav - I was thinking about what you said about triggers this morning and came to the rather depressing conclusion I'm triggered by feeling things haha - bored, sad, anxious, anything short of euphoria and my brain jumps straight to 'have a drink/pill'. I think I just have to acclimatise but its hard going working out what to do with myself.

TJAF - I've made a fair few attempts going back about 15 years now, I'm aware of the kindling effect as I have an unfortunate tendency to make multiple short lived attempts in quick succession - I've had four attempts at quitting drinking in the last 5 months and this is round five with painkillers in the last 3 months. I've only succeeded in picking up any real clean and sober time when its been on medical advice (screwed my kidneys up with a combination of prescribed immunosuppressants and alcohol at 19, years later was in a car accident and was banned from anything sedating due to the delights of post-concussion syndrome), or when my eating disorder was bad enough that the calories from alcohol gave me a meltdown. Thank you for your advice though, I joke that all feelings are triggers for me but self-loathing is definitely the biggest one I need to keep in check.

NS - its funny in some ways I'm very strong willed, heck to get as far as a PhD whilst being an alcoholic you have to have a ton of willpower, but I feel like maybe I use it all in willing myself to succeed in one area. I keep telling myself I can will myself not drink or use and yet here we are on attempt numbers four and five. Same problem with most addictive things - my caffeine habit is legendary at this point but I've had to give up fighting that one haha.

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Greetings everyone,

Getting ready for some seriously cold air moving in the next few days. Then next week it’s going to be in the 50’s, how crazy is that?

Battle, I mentioned drinking triggers because I remember how important they were for me. Anxiety & anger were right there at the top of the list for me! I had to figure out what I was going to do instead of drink when feeling anxious. I found the distractions that worked for me & made a solemn promise to myself to never drink AT someone ever again. I was sick of that old routine & it did nothing to improve my situation. You will figure out what works for you & I hope you feel better very soon.

TJ, kindling is a thing. I sure didn’t want to go there. All I wanted was AL to be in my past & decided that this quit had to be the final quit for me

Wags & NS, hello to you both, hope your days were good.

Hello to all & wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

Lav

[Mulburry]

Re: Newbies Nest

The last thing I think you should know about is Kindling, its something I learned about late and had I known about it earlier it may have saved me some tough times dealing with detox.

Same for me. Kindling is real and it's absolutely horrible. I kindled my brain to the point that even slight fluctuations in drinking levels, or cutting down by truly miniscule amounts would bring on withdrawal symptoms. If anyone is at the point that your noticing withdrawal symptoms, even mild ones, from a weekend binge, that's the start of it and it only gets worse. That's when you want to get out for good (sure wish I had back then).