Newbies Nest

[Hippy Chick]

Newbies Nest

Hello my friends.

Sounds like everyone had a brilliant AF weekend. Well done all of you, me included. My weekend was far too busy - doing things for everyone else and no time for me:durn:
My husband has finally realised that I am not drinking again and is giving me a hard time about it. Because I am not so tolerant when sober and he is drinking, he doesnt like it because I dont put up with the shit he dishes out. We went to his daughters house for "lunch" - got a sausage in a roll thrown at us at 3.45!!! And the conversation the whole time we were there was golf, golf, golf.... When I made the comment at 7.15pm that I was ready to go home, it was like I had said the worst thing in the world. So he cracked the shits with me and didnt talk to me for the rest of the evening. And tonight we went to my parents for dinner (my dad is a practising alcoholic of the worst kind - mean and nasty) so when I got up from the table because my h/b and dad were arguing about something stupid, I had the comment thrown at me that I was "obviously ready to go home early AGAIN". Talk about fed up!
And when I suggested to my supposed best friend (who drinks like a fish) that I drive on Saturday to this party we have been invited to she said " oh you're not doing that again, are you", meaning not drinking again.
What is it with some people..... If I said I had given up smoking cigarettes everyone would encourage me and congratulate me. But you tell people you are not drinking and it is like it's a terrible thing to do.
It's a good thing my mind is so strong at the moment - I will not let anyone jeopardise my sobriety. I dont care who they are....

Sorry I dumped that on you but I need it. You people are the only ones in my life that understand.
Hip

[fluff]

Newbies Nest

Hi Hippy Chick- That's really a tough situation- but remember you shouldn't feel you have to drink to make them happy- you need to be happy and that means being sober, right? I have a husband and friends who are heavy drinkers, too- but they don't pressure me to drink, I guess I just drink to fit in with them, sometimes. Did some one really throw a sausage roll at you?
Anyway, keep being strong and sober!

[Hippy Chick]

Newbies Nest

Hi Fluff.

No I didnt really mean she threw it at me, just aussie slang for been given something in a less than friendly way.
:H

[Hippy Chick]

Newbies Nest

PS. Love your avatar Fluff....

[DSLR]

Newbies Nest

Hi Hippy, sorry you are having grief from the people you would hope would be there to support.

Don't let them get to you, I know it is difficult when they are so close (my last ex-husband and father the same!) but it's your life not there's, be strong, you never know your husband or both might actually be jealous of your success!

We are here when you need a hug :l:l

Take care and keep going with the AF you are doing brilliantly.

[mylife]

Newbies Nest

Hippie.

So sorry you are going through all that with family and friends who should be supporting you. Hang in there. Maybe you will influence them eventually to join you.

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

I'm with DSLR, I think the other heavy drinkers in your life are jealous of your strength to quit....otherwise, they would do it. I always try to put myself in the other person's place...and when I'd come here having slipped and fallen out of the nest...I'd be so jealous (yet happy for) the people who were doing great! Misery doesn't just love company it loves MISERABLE company!! So when you are the one not drinking...hold your head up high, because the ones who make a big deal out of it are the very ones that wish they could do what you are doing but can't...and out of that comes anger. Been there, got the tee shirt.
Lav, what you don't have in sunshine, you make up for in GrandBabies!!! What's in the water over there????
I am so proud of everyone...myself included, 82 days!!!
I mentioned this the other day, but as a Southerner, Ima say it again...it is more normal now to not be drinking that it was to be drinking!!! Can you imagine before your quit...a sober night at home???? Unthinkable!!! And all the people out in restaurants I was sure were drinking...now I look around, and they are not!! I guess we see what we want to see!
I'll be in front of the refridgerator with a spoon, if anyone needs me....

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Hippy, I thought they were actually throwing sausages at you, too!!! Bahhh, what an image!! Over here, we call that 'throwing someone under the bus' that's not too appealing either!! Where'd these sayings come from??? Great day to all!

[Jolie]

Newbies Nest

Hippy - sorry for all the crap you got the past couple of days. Ditto what everyone else here said before me - I think they are jealous that you are able and committed to not drink where they might be questioning there own drinking habits.

You are the stronger one and you just keep on doing what your doing!

[Jolie]

Newbies Nest

Birdlady - I almost forgot - I was thinking the same thing yesterday! A couple of months ago, I wouldn't have been able to imagine myself not drinking every day - now, it is normal now for me not to be drinking and I'm seriously hoping it will always feel this way. Not naive though, I know we always have to keep our guard up!

Hello to anyone else that pops in today!

[4MyHealth]

Newbies Nest

Byrdlady,
Today is my new day one. It has been a long time. Read what you said: "Can you imagine before your quit...a sober night at home???? Unthinkable!!!". It is what scares me most. Often I don't want the wine, but I pick it up because I'm afraid of being stuck at home and wanting it...unable to get it. Today, I just won't buy it and do the "unthinkable" and have a sober night at home. Hope to get where you are..and Jolie...to where it is "normal" to not be drinking.
By the way...are you doing supplements or any of the medications?

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

4MyHealth...welcome and welcome some more!!! I tried the L glutamine when I first started last year and I couldn't really tell that it did much good personally. I may have been using it as a crutch and for God's sake, I needed all the help I could get! But when I ran out, I couldn't really tell any difference. Last year, when I first tried quitting is when I used it...I went 12 days without AL...then the idea came into my head, if I could quit for 12 days, then maybe I didn't have a problem after all and could moderate. Well, as many of us will tell you, this is something you must find for yourself. In my opinion, I wasted a whole year making deals with myself. But...and this is a big but! I had to find out for myself that I can not moderate. It totally consumes my thoughts and actions, how am I going to get my fix??? Is my supply good?? Won't these people go away so I can drink???? If I allowed myself 2 glasses of wine a night...then my whole day was spent waiting for the time when I'd get the first one. Was I scared? Dam right I was! I thought AL was the only friend I had ...How could I give up this wonderful thing that took away the feeling? How could I go a day without my friend? AL is like a siren on the cliffs...everything about it is aluring...until you peel away the layers and see what it is doing to your life. Ever looked at yourself in the mirror after you've thrown up from AL? Now that's scary. I know you are scared, but how many people can promise you something that's going to make you feel great....doesn't cost you any money...makes you see life in color again...and makes you healthier??? I can make you that promise!! AL is anything but a friend, in fact it is one of the worst alliances I have ever had, and the one I held onto the hardest. The way I was using AL was killing my social life, my work, my marriage and myself. "Scary" to me now..is if I hadn't done something about it....You can do this...If I can do it, you can do it....I promise!!!! Just try. Just give it a try....

[sunshinetoday]

Newbies Nest

Good Tuesday morning nest,

Welcome 4myhealth.:l I can definitely relate to the not wanting to drink as well, but I would buy it anyways and drink it. Even sometimes after I bought the wine I would have a little conversation in my head about how I should be strong and just pour it out because I knew how I would feel. Then my other side would tell myself that I couldn't waste alcohol, so I would just have to drink the whole thing. I really didn't see myself 10 days ago being 10 days AF right now, and finding all the support I could ask for here in the nest. I didn't even know this site existed until 10 days ago. I must say it is oh so nice to wake up in the mornings clear headed and ready to go. So again WELOCOME!

Hippy, You sound look a kick ass strong woman, and I am proud of your determination. Keep it up. It reminds me of that song from a while ago. "..Ain't nothin' gonna to break my stride,
Nobody's gonna slow me down, oh-no, I got to keep on movin' I think the song is by Mathew Wilder.

Byrd, I know what you mean about standing in front of he fridge with the spoon. I ate enough sugar this weekend to feed a large family. I am going to have a love affair with the gym this week in order to try and lose back the 3 kilos I probably gained.

Mylife, good job on your now 11 days. I am starting my 10th (WOW)! :happy: My husband even asked me how many days it was, and then said good job. He said he liked sober me. I do to. I can remember my night now, what I watched, what I read, what we talked about, etc etc.

To Lav, Jolie, VG, DSLR, Fluff, Scottish Lass, Dancinon, Mazzie, east coast girl, and anyone else! Have a wonderful day! :woot:

[InChains]

Newbies Nest

got into art college!

[scottish lass]

Newbies Nest

Well I didn't know Mondays could feel like this! Lovely!
last Monday I had a couple of glasses of wine - last Tuesday morning i poured the rest away - so tomorrow morning it will be a week. I am looking forward to getting my supplements and hope the L Glut will work - hope they will be in mail today.
Sunshine and Mylife - it is hard being away from your mum - i live in California, and my parents live in England. I talk on the phone every Sunday, but it is not the same...
well odne to everyone who made it thru the weekend, even thou it sounds like we collectively sorted out the cookie jar and chocoate box :H