Newbies Nest

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Good morning Nesters!

Wonderful to see so many popping in today!

Mya, congrats to you - keep it going

4MyHealth, just keep trying! We are never losers until we give up trying

JimG, welcome to the Nest, glad you found us! Sorry life is trowing you so many hurdles right now. Chossing to see your Doc & Psychologist for help was a great step, congrats! You deserve to be healthy & happy - we all do. You have a good plan in place, I wish you the best!

Greetings sunshine & lolab

Wishing everyone a fantastic AF Thursday!

Lav
2 YEARS SMOKE FREE TODAY

[madmans]

Newbies Nest

Well done Lav on your 2 years smoke free. MM

[sunshinetoday]

Newbies Nest

Well done Lav on your 2 years NF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Thank you MM & sunshine

It's a lot of work getting to know yourself as a non-smoking, non-drinking adult - seriously :H:H
But I figured, what the hell - I can do anything I really want

So can everyone else here :clapclap:

[lolab]

Newbies Nest

just took a break from painting the laundry room I was of course thinking while painting and this was my revelation....I'm painting the room a nice cleansing white....the actual color is "innocence" - ya think there's a connection to that being the place that I always hid my bottles???

[madmans]

Newbies Nest

My wife stopped smoking about 11 days ago, i think she stopped because she knew i hated them rather than stopping for herself . I hope she can stay of them, i can't stand them .

[scottish lass]

Newbies Nest

4myH ? don?t be so down on yourself! I had tried to slow and stop a few times before coming to MWO (it was even my NY resolution this year) ? since trying MWO and posting, this is my 4th attempt ? first one I managed 22 days and was so proud, second was a whopping 5 days, third ? did not even manage a full day before hitting the store ? today is day 4 ? but not and never will be easy. Don?t be hard on yourself and be happy for what you did achieve, and start again ? we are all with you?

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Lav! Great job on being smokeless!!! Thank god I never even tried that or that'd be on my list too! I'd be over in the smokers nest (and it's flammable!) You have such a strong sense of purpose...a real inspiration!
LoLab, there may be something to you painting your hiding place "innocence". I was a closet drinker, so I naturally drank in my closet!!! I was mortified the other day when I went in to wear a pair of shoes (just now getting warm weather) and there was an empty behind them....OH GOD! I'm sure glad there wasn't a hidden camera in there....what I allowed myself to do in there is now mind boggling...killing myself.
There are going to be starts and stops....Just as Lav said, if you can have one night of moderate drinking and then resume AF, then that's fine. Yes, that would be fine allright. Mighty fine! But in the giving in to the one night's free pass, all it did was to give me a license to do it again....I'm already off the wagon, I better drink all I can before I have to get back on. I sure wish I were one of the ones that could have a good night of cheer and resume AF the next day. But I'm not. So you may have to prove this to yourself over and over and over but one day it will catch and you'll just say, ya know, I'm just sick of this....I'll be damned if this bottle is going to cost me everything I've worked so hard to achieve. I'll just be damned! And that is when you set your mind to ending it. It's a hard break up, but as with all things, it gets soooo much easier with time. Set yourself goals, as Lav has taught us...24 hrs....3 days (monumental), 7 days, then 30 days, and it seems the rest takes care of itself. When you find that your mind is working on you.... in the long haul of this journey, what is one more night of getting drunk going to help? What is one glass of wine going to do??? (Raising my hand, I know the answer!) It's going to lead to another one. Fight it with everything you've got. This is a fight where the winner takes all. Byrdie

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Andrew, Vintage is out for a couple days...I get the sense that you could use a prop up! What if, instead of planning to drink this weekend, you planned not to? This is a wonderful opportunity to prove to yourself that you CAN relax and enjoy something without the aid of numbing juice. You will think, but I can't talk to people when I'm sober, but I bet you can! I can't enjoy music without getting a buzz...but I bet you have. If you choose to do this, your eyes will be opened, because your friends will soon look like a bunch of sloppy drunks around you. The worse they get, the better you feel!!! And I wonder if they are actually able to stop the next day....If you do this, you will feel so good about yourself. Right now, the way the plan is...don't you feel funny about the planned binge? Isn't there something eating at you that it's not what you should be doing??? I know that's how I was...just putting off the inevitable. If you stay sober your eyes will be opened!! You are ready...you can do it. If you can't, we'll be right back here on Monday....Byrdie

[sunshinetoday]

Newbies Nest

Madmans, My hubs quit smoking again a few weeks ago. I can't stand them either. Good luck to your wife.

Byrd and Lav, such sound advice you're giving out. Lav you really hit the nail on the head about getting to know yourself as a non drinker. I think I am getting to spend a lot of quality time with myself, and starting to change for the better as a person. You also see that not all of the issues in your life are due to AL, Al was just a cover up for it. I keep looking forward to the drink I'm going to have "one day," and when I think of that one day I know it will be to soon to let AL back in my life, so it is no longer welcome. It's almost like a relationship. You have finally left it behind, even though you still love it, but you knew it wasn't right for you, so you had to go find what is right for you. Yet you still miss it, romanticize the good times you had, and still feel the bitterness from all the bad it created. Strange, but I think of AL as old relationship for myself.

Have a great day everyone, must waddle off to work.:h

[JimG]

Newbies Nest

Morning all

Another hangover free morning and I feel happy. Woke up late with a slight Valium haze but coffee washed that away.

Smoking - I quit 12 years ago through a 7 week program where you changed all your habits (brand of cigarette, strength of cigarette, which fingers you hold the cigarette etc). It worked but 3 years back I started smoking when drunk. No impact on me when sober - I continued not smoking. Well....won't have to worry about that again!!

My anxiety has subsided and I have a plan for my own future but going back to work freaks me out. I have a decent boss but I'm just a bit freaked by contacting clients.

Scottish Lass, I have to pass that many bottle shops (liquor stores) in my area and the lure is almost unbearable depending on what the devil on my shoulder is saying to me. I see any day or series of days AF as victories.

My psychologist wants me to list on paper all of the good things and bad things about my drinking. That is, let's see what my perspective is. There will be one entry on the 'good'....that is at the end of the day a couple of drinks relieves tension. Unfortunately for me that means atleast 6 drinks. On the weekend it can be 15. The 'bad' list....well, I hope I have enough paper to write all those down.

I can't recommend counselling enough - esp cognitive behaviour therapy.

I'm only 5 days in but combining a few strategies (incl ordering some glutamine which I can't seem to find here in Australia), I have confidence that I can do this. I do have binge drinking friends which will be a challenge but I also have other friends who would rather a coffee.

Have a great day everyone.

Jim

[4MyHealth]

Newbies Nest

Hi All, Thank you for your words of encouragement and support! I am feeling more optimistic and less interested in poisoning myself today. I am so glad to have you here.
Daisy, thought of you today as you were the designated driver rewarded with bottles of wine. I made dinner for some neighbors who recently had their second child. He is a wine distributor. Brought over dinner...what does he give me? Two bottles of wine! Not necessary, I said. We insist, they said. I am going to have day 1 tomorrow. Happily...one bottle is red and I prefer white...so it won't be as bad as the usual 2 bottles.
Jim, thanks for your response. Good for you on calling your doctor. It is hard to realize in the midst of it, but you will find the person who loves you and appreciates you for who you are.
Sunshine, SL, Byrd, Lav, Lolab, thanks for keeping me here...
Have a great night/day everyone!

[mimi911]

Newbies Nest

I honestly don't know when I have posted here the last time.
Hope you are all doing well. i need to catch up with all of you but don't have much time with having the g-baby tonight.

I've been drinking in moderation only. You can see how much if you go into the drink tracker. I love the drink tracker. it's very satisfying to record my drinks or my lack of drinks.

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Late night check in for me -

Had my grandson here for dinner while his parents were out. They just picked him up & now it's bedtime.
I will tell you the absolute truth - I consider that little kid my savior! Had he not been born 2 1/2 years ago I'd still be sitting here guzzling wine & smoking my head off! I knew that if I wanted to spend quality time with him I had to clean up my act - pronto!!!

Saying hello & good night to everyone.
Please have a safe night.day in the Nest!

Lav

[4MyHealth]

Newbies Nest

Hi Lav, glad that your little cutie did it for you - AF & NF! What changed it from your kids to your grandbaby? My dad was alcohol full and nicotine full as long as I can remember. You have made a positive change. I hope I will change soon.

goodnight