Newbies Nest

[mimi911]

Newbies Nest

Day 24 and all is going well.

Just a little information: I met my husband when I was 16, been married 27 1/2 years. Had my kids young. wanted to adopt all my life but my hubby wasn't willing so the fact that I am still young enough to help raise my grandbaby is awesome. My brother who is 2 years older than me became a dad the same week i became a grandmother. It's awesome to have my big brother with a baby the same age so we can compare notes as we did today.

The other thing with getting this opportunity to raise this baby is, when my kids were little I had cancer.
So during their earlier years i was really sick and although I still did everything I did it sick and it's just not the same. Now I have energy and my health so I am thankful and maybe this is why it was never God's plan for me to adopt.

Take care everyone and stay sober just for one evening.

[Hippy Chick]

Newbies Nest

Hi all.

Mimi -wow! what a story. Maybe the universe had you get sober at this time so you can look after your grandaughter - fit and healthy this time.

Hi DancingOn - You're not anywhere near Christchurch are you? Sounds like they have finally decided to stop people building in such unstable areas. My husband is off to Hamilton on Saturday - if the volcanic cloud moves away from the Tasman!! Always something, isnt there!

Sunshine - well done on sticking to your goals while on holidays. I havent had a sober holiday yet. Last year I was off the booze for 7 months when we went over to the Gold Coast for a holiday and I had a few drinks over the week. Stopped when I got home for another three months then the rest is history. Think maybe that is why I am delaying making any plans for another vacation.....

Daisy - good on you for coming back. As I often say, doesnt matter how many day 1's you have, as long as you dont give up.

Hi Lav - how are your grandchildren going? Do you get to see them often?

Well time to be invaded by school children as I just heard the siren go. Will be back later.

Hip

[BlueFlower]

Newbies Nest

I like reading everyone's posts. Day 5 was great. The evening of Day 6 - tonight - might be hard but I think I can do it. I have a plan.

[Glamorous]

Newbies Nest

Help! Am new to this and not sure where to get started.
I am definitely a problem drinker. I don't drink every day, but when I start I can't stop. I can't even seem to buy just one bottle of wine at a time anymore as I know I will want a second, so just buy two and usually drink both bottles, and usually in secret, as my hubby hates me drinking.

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Good morning Nesters!

Hello & welcome Glamorous! Glad you found us, please settle in for a bit.
Most of us were wine drinkers, 1-2 bottles a night. Personally I did it to numb myself from a lot of stress. But you can change all that
A good place to start is reading the MWO book, You can download it right from the Health store here on the website. Next, you need to make a good plan for yourself. Look in the https://www.mywayout.org/community/f1...box-27556.html for some great ideas. A strong commitment & a good plan will take you far. I highly recommend the MWO Hypno CDs - they helped me learn to relax without wine & to change my thinking about drinking. Keep posting here & please ask if you have questions

BlueFlower, good to hear you have a plan for the evening - hope all goes well

Hi Hippy, yes my grandkids live nearby & I see them quite often. Makes me very happy & less lonely ince my husband ran off.

Mimi, honestly, the universe certainly has a plan for you!
Congrats on your AF time & enjoy yor grandchild
Boy, girl, how old??
My grandson is 2 1/2 & tons of fun. My granddaughter is 4 months this Saturday & my newest grandson is 11 weeks old! Fun times that I wouldn't want to miss

Hi Nelz, good you got your ride back together - stay safe!

Wishing everyone a great AF Thursday!
Lav

[Hippy Chick]

Newbies Nest

Hi glamourous and welcome to our little nest.

You have certainly come to the right place if you want help and support to stop drinking. We are all similar as we are all at different stages in our recovery yet we all come from very different backgrounds. Well done on realising you have a problem and deciding to do something about it. If there is anything you want to know just ask - someone will come up with an answer or relate a story. Tell us abit more about yourself. Dont feel embarrassed or ashamed here - there is no need for that as we understand the strength of addiction.

And to all those still lurking - please join us. By helping you, we help ourselves too.

Hippy chick

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Well said Hippy

Just wanted to wish everyone a safe night in the Nest.
The weekend is almost here ~ get your plans filled up with healthy alternatives to drinking - it really works

Lav

[Natilie]

Newbies Nest

Good evening Nest!
Haven't posted for a few days. It has been very hot here so I went to a local pool and swam laps after work yesterday and the day before. Great way to wear myself out and relax!
Finishing up 18 days AF tonight!! The exercise the last couple of nights really helped.
Last summer in the heat I would drink to forget about the heat and get numb.

Mimi, thank you so much for sharing your story. So glad you have your health back.
And what a joy to be a grandmother and have your grandchild near. I am "grandmother"
age now, but no grandkids yet. Both of my kids are in college, and I had them late in life,
so I am patiently waiting. Looking forward to that chapter in my life though. And Mimi, you are a week ahead of me, AF!

Work has me stressed out as usual. Had a little meltdown today, but only because I didn't sleep well. I am finding out that taking care of myself is my first priority. Sometimes it upsets others because they aren't used to me "sticking up" for myself, but to stay sober I know I have to be more assertive about my own needs and place boundaries around myself for my own well being. I'm not real smooth about it yet, but I am practicing!!

:welcome: to Glamourous! Hope you stick around--MWO and this forum is the best way to stay sober that I have found. So much good information here with all of the sharing.
And good going Blue Flower on Day 6! :thumbs: You have made it to a week tomorrow! It just seems to be getting better and easier the longer I am AF. Hope it is the same for you.

Thank you Lavand for being there for us here in the Nest, and always having words of wisdom and wishing us well.

Good night all! Going to try to get some better sleep tonight!
Natilie : "No alcohol today, I'm living in excellence"

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Good morning Nesters!

Quiet start to the day!

Natilie, sticking up for yourself - I totally get it!!!!
I stood up for myself when I quit drinking - did it calmly but effectively. After 1 year & 1 month my husband chose to walk away from our 37 year marriage. I knew, deep down inside that was going to happen. All I asked him to do was to get himself straightened out. He prefers to live in his delusional world & continue to feed his super-inflated ego. I think it was a blessing in disguise for me Don't be afraid to strengthen up your boundaries - people will deal with it or they won't - their choice.

Well, on that lovely note I'll wish everyone a great AF Friday!

Lav

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

I didn't have any children of my own, when I met my hubby, he already had one...she is now 40 with no signs of grandbabies...plus she works in a fertility clinic so I know she knows how....alas, I got a dog.
Welcome to the newer nesters...please don't hesitate to ask us anything...there's not a one of us here who couldn't tell you a story or two that would curl your hair. Most of us are lucky to be alive!
I know in the beginning those first days go so agonizingly slowly, but believe me after you get 30 or so under your belt, they fly by...and before you know it, you will lose count! There are NO downsides to not drinking....at least I haven't found one yet. If anyone I'm around is uncomfortable, they haven't shown it and have ordered their normal drinks... all the hangups were in MY head. Anyway, batton down the hatches, Friday afternoon is here and it's a bear sometimes...we are all here with you. xxxooo, Byrdie

[leaveinsilence]

Newbies Nest

hi nest

gosh i've barely had time to visit here let alone log in for the last couple of weeks, hope everyone is doing well and hamging in there.

so far i'm hanging in but to be honest it is just by a thread, i keep constantly reminding myself i don't drink, don't want to drink but that voice is in my head telling me the odd glass isn't going to hurt, just have one when you are outwith the girls then stick to your usual fizzy juice.

I'm off out tomorrow night one of our moms pizza and wine nights, i've stocked up with usual fizzy juice and choccies to take and a bottle of wine for the girls like i usually do but this afternoo found myself agreeing to walk instead of drive so that i could have a glass of wine with the others. Hope that I did it as it was just easier to agree than talk it through in the playground and that I get past this voice telling me its one glass and i can handle it, its just one night to get through after all that should be nothing compared to what i've gone through to get here, i hate this feeling of being torn

hope everyone ishaving a better day, i'm gping to. catch up with things here i thinks

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters!

Hi Byrdie - good to see you! I've actually been so busy all day with my daughter & granddaughter I never thought about what I used to do on Fridays..........
I'm happy with my new & improved life & am not missing the old life one bit

LIS, long time no see!
I'm sorry you are still feelingg torn because you've done so well. If you choose to have a glass of wine tonight ~ will that stop the mind chatter or do you think it might make it worse?
That's why I'm just too chicken to attempt to drink moderately. I just can't envision myself being satisfied with one glass of wine Whatever you decide, I wish you the best!

Wishing everyone a good night in the Nest!
Lav

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Shouting out to all Nestrs - where are you?????? Please check in

[leaveinsilence]

Newbies Nest

I'm here, I'm here, I was wondering where everyone else was and where my invite to this great AF party they are obviously attending:H

My problem I know is I obsess too much, I obsess over everything and work myself up in a right state over things, like I have been the last few days. I guess I needed some me time to focuss on my being sober as I did last night.

Lav answer to my question I don't know if it will shut the voices up or not, I know that I don't want to drink myself back to where I was 4 months ago, my sobriety is too important in my life now, I like the person I've become, 99% of the time I'm not bothered about the fact I can't drink again, yes I think about it constantly, I think to myself I'd love a glass or two ( I also know I can't and I know Modding will never be an option to be, it's not part of my plan anyway) but I'm obsessing about the difference of total sobriety and being sober at the moment.

Can I have the odd taste of wine now and again? For example someone asking my opinion over one they've bought, having a desert that contains alcohol a sip of champagne during a toast, not the actual consumption of a glass, but does the fact I've consumed even the tiniest amount in those circumstances and not drank enough to get drunk I've gone against my plan to stay sober.

I know the descision is mine and I have to do whats right for me but I was just wondering how others view their own sobriety, total abstinence or not.

I know I'll obsess to the cows come home over this point scared of how I'll feel if I break this run of AF.

Lee


Hope everyone is having a good weekend:l

[sunshinetoday]

Newbies Nest

HI nesters,
Just answering the call you put out there Lav.
Been surfing the site quite a bit tonight.

Hiya Bryd.
LIS, I definitely know what you're talking about with the thought of being able to have AL on some levels again. I keep putting the idea in my head that at some further date I will allow myself to have a drink. Then when that date comes I know it is not the time to start messing with my sobriety, so I go without. Then I set a new date that I will allow AL to come back around. The thing is, I like who am now that I am sober (I'm sure lots of others like me better too.) I also come back and have a read through past threads and remember all the things that I did, felt, went through when I was drinking. Which allows me to remember why I am here, how bad it REALLY WAS. BAD. That my health and my life were at jeopardy, as well as my relationships. If I did have a drink, would one really be enough? Anyways, just saying it plays through my mind a lot when I entertain the thought of drinking. When my resolve is that I do not drink anymore, I feel fine going without. Anyways, I wish you luck friend.

I am having a lovely weekend so far. Had a nice drive with hubs to a local seaside town and had some delicious dinner. We almost went to a place for tapas, and I thought that if I was still drinking I would love that place. It was darkly lit, had big drinks, and small plates of food. I opted for sushi instead and an Ice cream after. Planing to play some poker tomorrow, and hopefully hit the gym in the morning. I hope you are all having a lovely weekend as well.