Newbies Nest

[mylife]

Newbies Nest

Hello All,

Glad to see everyone is up and posting. Scottish, I recommend the CD's -- I think they help cement your committment not to drink. I'm not very suggestbale so they didn't really do much in the way of hypnotizing me not to drink -- but they are a good reinforcement. And you're right - about the price of a bottle or two of wine...!!

Mimi, great job on not drinking. And Gert, I agree it's hard to say "no" especially at the begnning. Probably best to avoid those situations until you've recally got a string of AF days behind you for strength.

Clover, hang in there - you can do this!

Lav, great to hear from you always!

I'm off to enjoy a hangover free and Sunny last day here visiting with my Mom! Tomorrow is back to work and reality - well I spend the day flying and then back Tuesday.

Have a fantastic AF day all!

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Here's what I think/believe about letting yourself have the occasional drink. I tried doing this for a year, and it doesn't work for me. When I began drinking, I thought, I've blown it now, I mays well drink as much as I can...then I will quit again. This is crazy talk. The times I blew it WEREN'T worth it. And who did I do it for? Some person I really don't like who also drinks like a fish? I found that when I let myself have AL, I always went back to the way I was and then some. Why the then some??? I don't know, but it's true. Like Lav, if it says it has AL in it, I avoid it, just because I don't want an excuse to tell myself, see? You had a little and it was ok.... For me, none. And it may take time for you to convince yourself, but most of the folks here are here because they've had an eye opening experience that we have a problem. I also worry, if we don't stay close here with like minds that we lose our resolve...I don't want to see how well everyone else is doing when I'm struggling so why even bother? And the number one reason I don't want to drink again is that Day 1 is a bitch!! I think if you slip, you have to start over on your count....but that's just me and that is incentive to keep my days in tact. You see, I'm being honest with myself now, and it's a pretty new thing. Don't give in to the voices they are telling you what you want/long to hear....Byrdie

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

scottish lass, I'm so sorry you are having trouble getting back on the wagon. I've already passed my CDs on to another member or I would send them on to you. They were very helpful to me in the long run. Why don't you put out a request for them in the General Section? Lots of people will see your post there. In the meantime, try Googling for free online relaxation meditations ~ lots of them out there. If nothing else they may help quiet the mind chatter that pesters all of us in the beginning

Byrdie, I'm not taking anything for chance. Just like a Diabetic avoids sugar, I avoid AL & there's absolutely nothing wrong with that I too don't know if I have the strength to face another day one!!! I'm done with testing myself

[BlueFlower]

Newbies Nest

Made it through seven and a half days. Now I am annoyed with myself. Thought I would be able to have one or two Saturday night glasses of wine with friends and stop there but I had more than that last night. What am I lacking? Commitment? Willpower? I have ordered the book and the L Glutamine, which I see is also supposed to be great for acid indigestion and for building strong muscles.

[InChains]

Newbies Nest

Blueflower - simple answer is time/experience. 7 and a half days is nto enough to try moderating, believe me if a habit was that easy to break none of us would be here. Conventional wisdom, and what I'd generally agree with si you need 30 days minimum, preferably more - tryign to mdoerate before then is pretty much certain to fail

[sunshinetoday]

Newbies Nest

He there Nest,
Today will be 85 days AF for me, and on my 3 month mark it will be 91 days. I can honestly say this is not how far I thought I would be at this stage. Though I am happy I have not allowed myself to drink. Although as I have previously posted that I have allowed myself to think that on a future date I will get to have a drink for special occasions, I have recently changed my mind about this. I will not be drinking anytime soon, or perhaps for ever. I will also not be planning an event in the future when I get to have one or two. For now I will stick with NONE. I am scared sh*#less by all the things that have happened to me from AL, and by who I was when I am drinking. Sobriety is still so new to me it constantly feels like I'm in week one, because it is still so new to say NO THANK YOU to AL. I do not trust myself with AL either. I might have one, but one will just not be enough. So why bother for myself. Once you get some weeks under your belt or longer, it does get easier to say no. You quit counting your days and just remind yourself that you are only going to promise yourself today is AF. More than that can seem overwhelming. Yes, the urges will at times still come on strong and test you, but it's all a part of things I suppose. So this is the stage I'm up to in my journey. I look at those that are staring on week one again and that felt like me yesterday. I look at those with more AF time than me and feel inspired to beat this demon. I look at all your post and honesty and draw strength from the fact that you all know Al to be the demon I do. I have almost died twice from drinking, and I have to much living to do to die yet. So I think at this point in my life AL is no longer welcome. Not even in a future celebration.
Just sharing where I am at with you all. It is a struggle, but it is necessary if I want to have any semblance of a life worth living. And I've got a lot of living to do!

[daisy45]

Newbies Nest

Sunshinetoday, well done on your 85days AF. I love how your thinking seems to be changing as you gain confidence and wisdom in your AF time. The celebration you may be enjoying in the future?; I suspect it will be your celebration of this new AF life! Must be nice to be at a stage where you are inspiring the rest of us Newbies....:goodjob::l

[gertrude mcfuzz]

Newbies Nest

Hello Nesters

Daisy - hope you are making it through a great weekend.

Sunshinetoday - what a great username, I love it! Well done on 85 days and thanks for sharing how it feels to be where you are at in the struggle. Yes we all have a whole lot of living to do and many sunshiny days. I was thinking last night about what you were saying about it being just as hard to say no on day 80 as it is on day 10. I have to get the strength to say "no thanks" now, as it will be something I will need to keep saying for such a long time. There will always be those times I will need the strength.

Inchains- yep, I agree, many of us are way too early in our battle to be trying moderation.

Lavande - thanks for your wise words. You are right, I feel like I was herded in to drinking. No excuse, thats the kind of situation I find myself in many weekends. Those are what all my friends are like that I see regularly. They are just not quite as bad as me. I have been practising saying "no thankyou" out loud at home. I am not going to any social situations this weekend, for anyone or anything so I can string some days together under my belt. I had one bottle of wine in the house and tipped it down the sink because it was talking to me and asking me when exactly I was going to drink it.

I am half way through the MWO book. I have had it for a while but I do get cocky thinking I don't need help, but of course I do.

Mylife - hello, sounds like a beautiful Sunday where you are!

Blueflower and Scottishlass -we are all in those early day situation together. Lets get control back. Yes I think we needs loads of commitment and willpower and strength in these early days. Keep posting. We will get through this together.

Monday morning here. Getting ready to take the children to school. The sun is shining! I will not drink today.

Day 2 for me
x

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Blue Flower & IC - hope you guys can summon up the strength to hop back on board - we'd love to have you on the journey with the rest of us!

sunshine - glad you posted about the change in your thinking. It kind of just happens, doesn't it? My plan to learn to drink like a normal person after 30 AF days went right out the window too! I had to be honest at the time & admit that NO, I was not ready for 1 or 2 glasses of wine. Now, after all this time, I honestly don't want it Congrats to you on your 85 AF days - what a difference, huh?

daisy, honestly the inner growth & strength happens as you put in some real AF time. Your thinking shifts to poison - why do I want to put that in my body? Of course we don't!!!

Gert - keep reading that book & if you can get your hands on the MWO CDs, use them as well! It's true, in the beginning we do have to constantly remind ouselves that we want to be AF. After a few months, you don't have to consciously think about it. It takes our sub-conscious a while to catch up

My garden is producing prolific amounts of squash & cucumbers right now. Waing on green beans & tomatoes. Oh, and the raspberries are going crazy too :H

Have a safe night/day in the Nest everyone!
Lav

[dancingon]

Newbies Nest

Congratualtions Sunshine. That's great. I guess after time the anxiety and newness must go away and it must feel normal to not drink.

[noodle]

Newbies Nest

Hi guys, I'm back again with day 1 , but I really need to start again, so here goes. Sunshine today, what an awesome post. Please keep inspiring us to beat this demon! I have to face up to the fact how much damage I am doing to myself. It's not normal to walk to work every morning in the rain because I'm worried I'll be over the limit to drive, Its not normal to wake up with last nights makeup on, purple teeth and in yesterdays clothes, It's not normal to prioritise booze above everything else. Thank God for you all, it's great that we've found a place where we can support each other. xx:l

[mimi911]

Newbies Nest

Hello Nesters,

this is the end of day 28 and like day 27 we had friends over for a dinner party. These friends not only brought wine, they brought me a bottle of my favorite wine. HOWEVER, I politely, got a diet coke, told them "no thanks" and the bottle of wine went home with them. i did however open the bottle they had brought for themselves (we like different wine) and served it to them.

I decided that there are too many important decisions to be made in life and I can't make them if I am drinking alcohol.

Sunshine, I know that I can't drink like a normal person so I would rather not drink at all and if I can't "not drink" around my friends who do drink then I won't be around them. I have done fine the last few days but if it gets harder I will have to change that part of my life.

[witchywoman]

Newbies Nest

Hi Nestlings
I know I havent posted much lately, had lots going on, however I am clocking in 3 weeks AF today. This is just an uber quick check in, I am full of a head cold & going to go to bed to try & get rid of it.
hope everyone is doing well.
XX

[pingu1997]

Newbies Nest

Hi to everyone

104 days for me today and it was so lovely waking up in this glorious sunshine without a headache!

I have got my head around a good long period AF, but not around giving up completely. I think for now that's fine for me

Not looking forward to the thunderstorm that is forecast for later, neither my son's sports afternoon in this heat

[Hippy Chick]

Newbies Nest

Hi everyone.

Well done on 104 days Pingu. I love cats too.

Scottish Lass - the CD's are definetly worth the cost. I listened to them constantly when I first started and they really helped me with sleeping also. My sleep was completely stuffed up because most nights I was comatose and not sleeping.

Well said Byrdy.

Blueflower - I dont think you are lacking in anything. It is the strength of the addiction. I think when we finally realise how strong the pull is towards drinking, we can finally take charge and say NO to those AL voices.

Well done on 85 days Sunshine. Looks like there is a few of us heading towards 100 days ( mine is tomorrow!! YAY!:thumbs

Gertrude - some people just dont get it. They dont understand that some of us have trouble saying no to AL. One of my closest friends - who is a big drinker - and I went to the pub after work on Friday. She got really annoyed with me because I wouldnt have an alcoholic drink! I had a glass in my hand, just like her yet mine was minus the AL. After we finished the first round, she spat it and said we might as well go home if you're not going to drink! I couldnt believe it. We were having a nice time, talking and laughing, yet I didnt have alcohol in my glass and she wasnt having a good time.... To be completely honest, I think she feels she has a problem with the amount she drinks and she felt guilty. But I stuck to my guns and wasnt going to let her railroad me into having a drink with AL in the glass ( that's all she wanted, sounds so stupid, doesnt it).
It takes alot for me to go out in public (and not be pissed!) so I wasnt going to let her spoil my evening.

Lav can you send some raspberries over to me... I love them. :H

I hope everyone else is staying strong, and if not, stay close. It's not easy - but it is worth it.

See you tomorrow.

HC