Newbies Nest

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Good morning Nesters!
Happy to report the power has been restord in Lav-land!
Did I mention my 'whole house generator' does not operate the hot water heater? Grateful to have a decent shower today

Byrdie, that is a great quote.......sounds kind of Ben Franklin-ish to me!!!!

4me, I'll share a secret with you......
You can do anything you really want to do! You just have to want it bad enough.
Why not challenge yourself to an AF vacation? It's actually easier, IMHO to remain AF than to deal with temptations, guilt, remorse, hangovers, etc. Think about it

I need to play catch up today now that I can. No power = no business for me

Wishing everyone a terrific AF Tuesday!
Lav

[gregorino]

Newbies Nest

Byrdie's Bible

Byrdlady;1170943 wrote: There's only one thing worse than having to learn by experience...not learning by experience. Ain't that the truth. Byrdie

Thanks Byrdie! I think it's worthwhile to keep some recent experiences right up front in the old short-term memory. I can clearly recall drinking a LOT of beer in a hurry on a Monday night 6 weeks ago...I could barely even stand up and missed the landing when I went to flop into a chair...the arm of the chair nearly punctured my spleen or kidney or something I would rather not have punctured.... Anyway, the pain in my back took nearly a month to subside, but I intend on keeping the experience of that evening close in mind, lest the voice think it's going to have some influence with me...

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Lav! I had a whole note typed out and lost it!!!!!!!!!!!
AF vacations are peaceful realities now. I actually used to connect in Charlotte because there was a wine store I could grab a couple bottles and stash in my carry on before getting on the second leg of the flight. Then I'd gulp it in the bathroom before boarding. Man...I never realized what a choke hold AL had, maybe I did and wouldn't look it in the eye. My mind is so much more peaceful...there's not that chatter of how to protect my supply..how to hide the empties, how to sneak it when no one is looking...how to ACT sober...the resentment when I couldn't get it when I wanted it. It was never enough...it is such a blessing to be free of that. But I must remain vigilent...AL will sneak in and take up where it left off...only worse and set in deeper. I just can't face Day 1 again. I couldn't face the nest....and I NEED this nest. So...I think about something else....Byrdie's 3 little words...THINK ABOUT SOMETHING ELSE. My luggage weighs a lot less too. Ever have vodka leak out going to a business meeting? It's very embarrassing....Byrdie

[gregorino]

Newbies Nest

Dont Be Freakin!

4me;1170979 wrote: Still freaking out aboutt my 30 day AF looming in the near future.

4Me - Try and lighten up on yourself. If quitting was a walk in the park there wouldn't be an MWO, or 50,000 rehab centers. It's a one day at a time deal - like Ms Byrdie says, "All I gotta do is make it through today." It's overwhelming to deal with the idea of no AL for 30 days, or forever and ever, when AL has been a huge part of your life. We all know that, 'cause we have all been there. It's great to have a goal of thirty days, and I know you'll be able to achieve that, because you will eventually want it bad enough you will just tough it out for 30 days; although, you will most likely find by day 10 or day 13 that you really aren't having to "tough it" anymore....you just need to not drink today. That's all. And tomorrow when we wake up, we don't drink today. And so it goes....it's always today, and today I'm not drinking.

[gregorino]

Newbies Nest

Byrdlady;1171137 wrote: Lav! I had a whole note typed out and lost it!!!!!!!!!!! ...Byrdie

Ms Byrdie...I am the slowest typist in North America. Three fingers and a thumb and I have to look...it's pretty pathetic! So, almost every time I write something, and you know I don't write many short things, when I click on submit reply or preview post, I'm back at the login screen again. And when I log back in, my post is there.... Maybe this is happening for you too...??

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Sonofagun!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Now what's up with THAT??? Too late tho...I reconstructed it and now it's last year's Easter Egg. I will do that next time! Thanks G!!! I love this site with all my heart, but I'll be...I find it rather hard to navigate. I was on here for 3 weeks before I figured out how to reply!!!!!!!!!!!! Bah! I appreciate that tip, tho...I will keep that in mind next time my post goes missing!!!! you rock. Byrdie

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

I'm treating y'all to typing lessons :H

I lose an occasional post too Byrdie & Greg ~ no worries

Was just thinking I went out to the store twice right before the storm got here to get bottled water, non-perishibles, etc. but no smokes & no wine - how cool is that?

[leaveinsilence]

Newbies Nest

Evening nesties:l

Another day spent searching for school cardigans, straightforward green colour you'd think they would be easy to find, but nooo not here I've been searching for the right size since beginning of July, finally ordered them online so hope they arrive before Monday, just got shirts to buy for my eldest, can't find anything that pleases the little madam.

Greg, you are so right about keeping memories at the front of your mind, i think we tend to bury them with our embarassment but keeping something fresh can make the difference between thinking I'll have that one or no I can't, and I'm right with you on the thinking just a short time ahead, taking it little by little is the only way for me at the moment...

4 me, Lav is right when she says about AF vacations, they really are better than AL ones, none of that stress about hiding your stash, the worry about someone finding it, not being too hungover to enjoy the next day, too many years I dragged myself around with the kids unable to give them my complete attention and have fun with them, but never again, I want to give them all that, although according to my eldest having a Mom hurtling down giant slides and trying to walk on stilts in sooo embarrassing. Why not try at least the first few day AF and go from there I bet after feeling good the first couple of days you'll remain AF throughout.

Lav Byrdie wise words as always... Yes being AF does make the mind clearer, not having that hold over us is so liberating and I feel morte confident when I'm sober.

Well I was offered a job today, whilst out shopping, a recruitment company were looking for staff, unfortunately the training started tomorrow so it was too short notice, but I've decided to apply to go on their staff list something I wouldn't be doing a few weeks ago.

Anyway have a good day all

Lee xxx

[leaveinsilence]

Newbies Nest

Lavande;1171250 wrote:

Was just thinking I went out to the store twice right before the storm got here to get bottled water, non-perishibles, etc. but no smokes & no wine - how cool is that?

Extremely cool:l

[Turnagain]

Newbies Nest

Leave....I'm glad good things are happening for you! And when the endorphins start pumping again on their own...it seems like the whole world is a brighter place - even when things go wrong.

4me...and all the other little peeps facing vacations or special events...I strongly encourage you to hang onto your quit. I made it through my first ever AF vacay recently and it was a revelation. I had a blast without AL. I even came back a pound or two lighter - despite eating a lot of good (and good, but not good for you) food.

I didn't white knuckle it. Before I left, I finally accepted the fact that I cannot mod. Yeah, I do like the way a great beer or fine wine tastes. But when I drink, I just really want to get drunk. I wanted - needed the buzz. And since I had gotten to the point where I needed to drink everyday and it was taking more and more drink to get drunk...I realized there was no room for compromise in my life - if I was going to have much life left in the years ahead.

It was scary to "give up" AL for good. I started by just saying the phrase (out loud) "I don't drink anymore." The more I said it...the more I started to believe. I went into the vacation with the simple mantra..."I will not drink...no matter what."

Now...after nearly 40 days under the belt (this time) I don't even think too much about drinking anymore. Last time I had this many days AF, I was still harboring hope I could drink 'normally.' It's a relief not to have that idea and the uncertainty that it brings hanging around my life anymore.

There's power in that. I was out visiting my daughter last week and when I got home, I discovered that DH had purchased a CASE of wine while I was gone. And then, last night, someone sent us 4 bottles of Argentinian wine to thank us for a favor. You know what? Those bottles aren't screaming my name. The Voice isn't whispering that I can handle it now....and even If I couldn't handle it, I could always get drunk just one more time and replace what I drank. Nope. The only voice I hear is mine...and it says...."I don't drink."

Guess I'll just have to get busy and plan a lot of dinner parties with friends who CAN enjoy nice wine without getting blotto.

[Turnagain]

Newbies Nest

Grego and Byrd...

I just lost a post with a tip about how I learned how to NOT lose a post! Wow. Glad I don't drink no mo. That would've sent me off into wonder-land for a bit, eh?

What I wrote went like this. WHEN I can remember (clears throat) I COPY what I'm writing every so often...that way if my internet connex drops or I hit the wrong key...I don't lose everything I've written.
All I have to do is log back in and PASTE.

Just for the record..you're reading this - and I didn't need to paste it this time...but I could've!

[Clockwatcher]

Newbies Nest

Day 4, again and again..... Thanks for the posts as they help me not give up hope and come back again....thanks

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Turn.....you have come so far!!! I can't tell you how my heart bursts with joy to see you finally accepting this. The final phase of grieving... You are in such a good place. Like you, 8 months ago, I'd have downed that wine in the case and replaced it. Dam that person.
Funny about your losing the post while posting about losing posts!!!! Bahhh!!
Lav, you sure smell better...glad your power got back online!!! Shooooeeee it was getting bad on your side of the nest, girl! ehehe. Being without power sucks.
Clock, get on back up in here. We will get thru this. We will ride it out together...we will all be right here for you. Dam addiction...it just sucks the life out of you doesn't it. You are back, and that's all that matters today.
Hugs to all today...if you are lurking, you have come to the right place...settle in and listen a while, then tell us what is on your mind. Maybe we can help. Peace to all....(I don't say that lightly...if you aren't hearing voices...that's the peace I wish) Byrdie

[shellit1]

Newbies Nest

So glad to be here

I am new, and day 2 is drawing to a close. Thank God. I hear what you all are saying about thinking I can moderate. It hasn't happened in 20 years, so what makes me think it can happen now. It won't, so just need to accept that fact and move on. Tired of not sleeping well, tired of feeling claustrophobic in rooms, feeling anxious while driving....need I go on? Starting to be really paranoid about what I've done to my brain, heart and liver... I have done the vitamins, kudzu, and a couple of prescriptions....which I will continue to do, but now I won't be counterproductive with the wine.

Like I said in a post yesterday, looking forward to not consuming 500 empty calories per night, and getting back down to my old respectable weight. 40 pounds in 15 years....yikes. The longest I've gone is 7 days in a row, and that was on New Year's Day. September challenge here I come. :new:

[Clockwatcher]

Newbies Nest

Byrd, thanks...tried to moderate but even "moderate" was 5 beers weeknight, blowout Friday night and Saturday nights.....well guess what failure is====me trying to moderate...came to address it again on saturday after drinking friday night to the point I realized that after drinking as much as I could get my hands on I still wasn't happy; and of course my condition the next morning ( not deathly hungover but functional alcoholic dead tired ) made me be honest with myself for a rare moment which has lasted, so far, 4 days........been reading these posts a lot and they help a lot, especially late at night into early in the morning on the ipad...thanks