Newbies Nest

[FreeFly]

Newbies Nest

Fuckety fuck! (soz for language) Just taken a trip down the rabbit hole. Felt so damn good for those two days - why am I so useless!

Hi Melissa - people on here are truly lovely. I'm probably not the one to talk to right now though.

[lovemygirls]

Newbies Nest

I'm new and would like to become a member...can anyone let me know where to put my cc into the system so I'm a member. I've tried to find it in the source engine but no luck. Any suggestions? Thanks!

[hadit]

Newbies Nest

Hello Melissa, and welcome. You have made a good decision to check out MWO There are lots of people here that can help. Since finding MWO I have been able to reduce my al intake from 1.5 bottles of wine a day to 1 to 2 bottles A WEEK. Cutting down "gradually" seems to be working for me, but it does take a lot of determination. I gain lots of support from others on MWO. I really couldnt have done it without the support of all the wonderful people on this site. I would check out as many posts as u can:welcome:

[lovemygirls]

Newbies Nest

It's ok CantBelieveI'mStillAtIT~ It was not so long ago that I was drinking 2 1/2 big bottles. I would black out and my husband was just waiting for me to say "I need help". He knew that I needed to say it, I'm the most stubborned women you can meet! LOL! But one night, I could not get to bed...so embarrassing to myself and husband. He could only carry me to the bed. I've done some really crappy things lately. Like last night, the wine bottle was in the refrigerate and I would take gulps because I was feeling so bad and thinking about the damage I've caused. We all have our own "war stories". My hubby saw that the bottle was almost gone and what do I do...turn it around on him. I'm so shameful of the things I've done!

[lovemygirls]

Newbies Nest

Nice to meet you boozer. Yes, it's something that you really want! It has been hard for me but when you call AA hotline, which is what I did when I knew I needed help. For me and my profession, this can not be on my insurance..period! But I feel like I have some new friends already here. Thanks for the welcome!

[hadit]

Newbies Nest

Good Morning Nesters Its going to be a very nice spring day in OZ. Its been such a horrible winter, everyone cant wait for some sunshine! Cant Believe, I have slipped up many times. It took me a long time to realise that I needed to learn from theses slips Why did it happen? What do I need to do next time al is on offer? What plan do I have in place to say NO!!! Its very much a learning process. Slipping up is part of that learning.............from little children to adults we learn from our mistakes IF we want to!!! I know today is going to be a tough one,my plan is in place. If I slip I will just get back up and try again. You cannot change what happened yesterday but you can learn from it. Today can be the first day of your af life. Dust yourself down and jump back on board.

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

LoveMyG's...You haven't done anything most of us haven't done ourselves (see my comment on drinking vodka out of a hairspray bottle). We have blamed, cussed, lied, stolen and deceived like nobody's business. Gulping from a bottle of wine? Child's play around here. You are in a good place. We here in the nest are serious about getting AL (alcohol) OUT of our lives for good. It's not easy, but when you have the help and advice of others who have walked in your very shoes, and they are succeeding, well, it goes a long way. Like Boozer said, there are caring people here. I certainly couldn't be the almost 10 months sober without them. Do we make mistakes?.... We sure do, but the worst thing you can do is give up. It will take some real grit to get past the first couple days, but you stick close and you will make it. Lav is our nest mother, she'll give you the links and help you find your way around this site. I find it confusing...so I don't wander off too much. There are other threads and you will find support anywhere here....but if you are serious about quitting...this is the place to be. We are NOT going to tell you what you want to hear....we are like that guy on tv, 'it's raining cold hard facts up in here'. Take it step by step...don't think too far down the road...if you are like I was, my really tough times started at 5 when I got off work. But I work from home and soon 5 became 3:30....sometimes 2:30...by 8 pm I was passed out. So maybe you only have a few really witching hours to get passed and you're ok. My habit began in my late 20's...and I am turning 52 this month. A lifetime of bad habits....getting headstarts on parties...drinking to be social...drinking because of a good day, drinking because of a bad day. Once I hit the bottom...I just ran out of options...it was rehab or AA. The thought of this getting out would be agonizing to me. That's when I found this place. It took me a solid year of trying to moderate and have a decent relationship with AL...but it was too strong. IT ALWAYS won. So like any unhealthy relationship, once I cut it off, I started healing and moving in a positive direction. So pull up a twig, and tell us about yourself. What did you google to get here? Byrdie

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Can't Believe, I was out with a customer and his wife (as well as several coworkers)....He knows I have ulcerative colitis, I've known him for years and years...but he's a heavy drinker, and when I declined a drink in front of everyone he said, "Come on.....what's ONE DRINK gonna hurt?" The pressure I felt was incredible...but I looked out over my glasses, raised one eyebrow, and said, 'It isn't YOUR colon!' That shut him right up. Not a word about it since either. This is what Lav is talking about when she speaks of having a plan. You just gotta have your pitch when you get an a$$hole determined to make you have a drink. Don't give in....they WANT you to fail! Other heavy drinkers WANT YOU TO FAIL! They don't want you to be doing what they can't do! How DARE you! So have your story ready....BTW, AL does not seem to affect my colitis....but no one has to know that but us!! I sometimes say when questioned that it is like battery acid to my insides. It works for stubborn cases. Most of the time, however, when I say no, no one thinks a thing about it. Most people don't care at all! The ones that make a big deal about it are the ones to whom AL is a big deal. (Cause I was one of 'em!).
You are still here after falling in the hole....well done, my new friend!!! Here's a hand now, get on outta there, and we'll work on it. Byrdie

[sunshine_gg]

Newbies Nest

Wow Byrdie! I don't think I've ever come across anyone that insistent and rude - Good for you! Yes, I also noticed that a LONG time ago... hardly anyone really cares what/whether we are drinking. It's mostly US who make a big deal out of it.

Anywhoo... I had a very hectic last week, a lovely Thanksgiving weekend, and it will take me forever to catch up with everyone :H

Hope all you Nestlings are having a cozy, happy, AF evening!

[ImHereNow]

Newbies Nest

24 days . . .

well Nesters, I'm on my 24th day of my 30 day abstinence. I've made it thru weekends, weeknights, parties, dinners, boredom, hubby's extended business trips, joys, lows, stresses, celebrations - even poured the last of some white wine leftover in the fridge on a pot of mussels I was steaming last night. My plan was to be alcohol free for 30 days before even thinking about making a plan. This has been the most painless abs period I ever had. I am at 75 mg of topa and never increased it as I wasn't having cravings. At some point I'm going to go out to dinner and have a glass of wine (likely my birthday weekend after next) and really don't know "the rules" when it comes to topa and moderation. It looks like some of you still drink AND take meds - yes? I'm also going to try different threads on this site and Moderation Management for suggestions from people that have moderated and abstained and what worked and what didnt work in their "plan". I know that sitting home and opening a big bottle of wine is a "no-no" for me. If I stick to sharing a bottle of wine with hubby when we go out to dinner - its a much safer alternative - and something we'd do a few times a month - not a few times a week or every nite. And I think I should plan (in advance) SAFE "tipsy" nights once or twice a year. Like New Years Eve - which is our anniversary too - or a night on vacation. I don't mean drink the way I used to - to the point of blackouts and drooling - but likely have a few more drinks, midnight toast, etc. and still be able to get myself to bed and undressed under my own power. I got this idea from the HARM reduction website. Suggestions welcome!!!!!

[daisy45]

Newbies Nest

Lovemygirls, welcome! Boozer, Lolab, Lav, Sunshine, Byrd, Can'tbelieve, hi!
On the subject of friends, I have a certain crowd of girlfriends who get together in one anothers houses for very big booze-ups over the years. They want to get together and the first question is 'are you still off the drink?' If it's a 'yes' which it will be from here on in, they delay the night until 'I'm back on it'. I have said to them to go ahead anyway, I'll go. It seems they are waiting for the expected 'failure' to come my way. All I can say at this stage is 'let them wait'. I have a feeling I'll be dropped from the company on those nights and you know what.......I am not bothered. Hope they don't but if they can't accept me the way I am then....

I do have other friends who don't really care and I am going out of my way to rebuild neglected relationships and do other things with them - activities, lunch, dinner, exercise.

It's just a natural thing that we will all encounter. I was one of them and never liked a sober person watching what I was up to while intoxicated, so really what can I say.....just glad I'm not in that place any more.

[hadit]

Newbies Nest

Daisy, What can I say ...WELL done! Whether we drink or not, shouldn't make a scrap of difference with REAL friends!! Real friends will respect your wishes!:goodjob:

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

Another long day done & dusted for me

Hello & welcome to lovemygirls Melissa - glad you found the Nest!
There is no need to become a subscriber right now, you are alreday a member just by signing up.
I was a big wine drinker myself & did the same thing. Once I found MWO I decreased my intake a little each day until I was down to just one glass/day. Quitting safely is important! I also downloaded the MWO book from the Health store here & read about the supplements, light exercise, healthy eating & the Hypno CDs (which I highly recommend).
Arm yourself with a good plan too. Look in our https://www.mywayout.org/community/f1...box-27556.html for lots of great ideas. Stay close to the Nest we are only too happy to help in any way we can. Putting the shame behind you is difficult but doing so will free you up to focusing on building your AF life

CantBelive - what happened & why??
Glad you are with us, let us help!

Hi there Sunni!

ImHereNow, I haven't heard of that website you mentioned.
I thought I wanted to learn to drink moderately when I first came here but changed my mind by the time I hit 30 AF days. I asked myself honestly if I was ready for just one or two glasses & the answer was No! That's when it hit me that AF was most likely the better way for me to go. We each have to make that decision ~ just be totally honest with yourself & stay safe.

daisy, changing habits, changing friends is all part of the process & it's perfectly OK. I put a lot of value on my sobriety too

Have we seen greg lately??

Byrdie, you can bake up something with that bleached flour & send it up for my chickens - theyll love you!!

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

OK,
Just ordered a copy of the bread book from Overstock.com for $14.70
Thanks for the suggestion

Wishing everyone a safe night in the Nest!
Don't forget we have nest belts & plenty of butt velcro if needed

Lav

[tomthyme]

Newbies Nest

amybody out there? are there still chats on this site?