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    Newbies Nest

    That post is special to me, too. I had to ask myself the really hard questions... and the answers weren't pretty.

    Star, I am wondering if you'd like to take the full moon honors? This is a busy time of year (in my day job) and I'm afraid I'm going to miss someone....you just pull down yer britches and .......eheheheh. Can I pass the torch? B
    All you gotta do, is get thru this day. AF 1/20/2011
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      Newbies Nest

      Ow wow, Byrdie- What an honor to hand out the full moons-

      I'd be happy to, BUTT, about pullin' down the britches :blush: can I at least keep my spanx on?
      :heartbeat:

      Star:star:

      08-13-15

      I am only one drink away from never being sober again.

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        Newbies Nest

        :H:H:H Star, NO BUTTS!! Sure, keep yer spanx on!
        Enjoy!! B
        All you gotta do, is get thru this day. AF 1/20/2011
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          Newbies Nest

          Hi Byrdie and thanks for the post and the moon. To think that Nanette and I will be two of the last to get the awesome Byrdie Full Moon!

          To get serious for a moment, I realize that I, too, am more focused on 'hanging on by my fingernails' and not fully appreciating the gift of being free from the bondage and the chance for a completely changed and improved life. A chance not everybody gets.

          It has a LOT to do with attitude, I realize. A million people can't have one thing or another, due to diabetes, allergies or whatever, and live with it. We can too. And I hope to do it with good grace.

          I remember reading in a post, how the guy just wanted to get his 'quit' established firmly and move on. Not to spend everyday obsessed, either with drinking or trying not to drink. Counting days for the rest of his life.

          That would be ideal for me: that AL would just cease to be a constant issue in my life. To get to a place that it's just an occasional twinge of temptation, like other similarly deprived people get. Not to spend hours out of a day agonizing over it. Just dismiss it: 'I don't drink, thank you'. Finally, ACCEPTANCE, as you posted.

          Thank you for your 'moon service', Byrde. And now we will be getting the awesome Star Full Moons! Thank you Star from everyone!
          AF since 12/2/12
          http://hamsnetwork.org/taper/

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            Newbies Nest

            Almost free, I understand how you feel. I took the posture of: Fake it til you make it. I counted the days for the first 30...and then I counted forward when my 100 days would be. I didn't really count in between there...I just knew the days were slowly adding up to quite an investment. I hit my 100 days on April 29th, 2011 which happened to be the day Will and Kate married. I didn't care, it was a big day for me, too. Everyone was celebrating! I wasn't so new that I was teetery, but wasn't an old hand at it either. 100 days was important to me...I could get to the end of an evening and realize that I hadn't thought about AL all evening. I was more comfortable in socail situations and wasn't scared for myself. At 100 days, a lot of things changed for me and I knew that I must guard my quit with my life. Like Lola said the other day, each day I've had I thought was better than the previous day. As I approach 2 years, I am so glad I stuck it out to see the miracle that can happen. It IS a miracle. Just like you said in your post, AL is now a passing thought, not an obsession. There's no question that the first 30 days are the hardest, but for me, remaining AF was what I had to do. My head wasn't rewired. Just like in Ktab's post, it went right back to where I was. This was ME, tho...I can't speak for everyone, but I knew in my heart of hearts what I had to do. One night I was at a company meeting, and sitting there in the hotel room were 2 small bottles of wine (one red and one white). I thought, no one would have to know! Then the next thought...these are 2 small bottles of wine, it wouldn't be enough. So I took the laundry plastic bag and covered them so they looked ridiculous sitting there. Just as ridiculous as I'd have looked sneaking and drinking them.

            I guess what I'm trying to say is that when you set your mind to this goal, and you give yourself a chance to get there, it IS worth it. To look at AL as if it were a spoiled peice of fish I wouldn't touch for a million bucks? Priceless. But you have to give yourself a chance to get there. It sure doesn't happen over night...but neither did my drinking problem. Hope that helps...Byrdie
            All you gotta do, is get thru this day. AF 1/20/2011
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              Newbies Nest

              Yay to that Byrdie!

              I remind myself regularly that it has taken 23 years of solid drinking to get into this mess.......I accept it will take some time to get out. That seems fair to me.

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                Newbies Nest

                Aww AF - thank you! I will do my best to live up to the high standards set by the one and only Byrdlady!
                :heartbeat:

                Star:star:

                08-13-15

                I am only one drink away from never being sober again.

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                  Newbies Nest

                  Wow Star! I feel like we should have an official ceremony or something. Congratulations. I'm sure you'll be a real pain in the @## from now on.
                  ~nurdl
                  :notes:
                  we are human beings with alcohol problems not alcoholics with problems caused by drinking

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                    Newbies Nest

                    Bennii I hope all is well with you. We started a day apart and today is day 7 for me. I have had alcohol thoughts today alot. I thought I would check in with you and maybe that would help me.

                    What's up buttercup? Hee Hee
                    AF Since 11/02/12 :wings::bananacomputer::lilangel:

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                      Newbies Nest

                      Now now, nurdle! I agreed to distribute the awards but Byrdie is still gonna get to be the grand pain in the arse she always has been. Nobody does that like the Byrdlady
                      :heartbeat:

                      Star:star:

                      08-13-15

                      I am only one drink away from never being sober again.

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                        Newbies Nest

                        Well thanks....I think! :H
                        All you gotta do, is get thru this day. AF 1/20/2011
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                          Newbies Nest

                          I'm going to miss Birdies butt but I look forward to seeing Star's :H
                          AF since october 8th 2012:new

                          How to get Alcohol free in 6 minutes :H
                          http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ow0lr63y4Mw

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                            Newbies Nest

                            Hi Everyone,

                            And thank you Byrdie for your post. I hate that feeling you described of being afraid for yourself and what you might do when alcohol is around. Doesn't that just say it all about how powerful this compulsion can be?

                            I can't tell you the number of times I had fully resoved to quit when I woke up, and all I had to do was stumble on a mini bottle in my dresser drawer or somewhere else I had hidden AL and within a minute, it was down the hatch. Not even a struggle.

                            The scene you describe in the hotel room is something I would dread, even with a lot of time. Maybe that will change, but to be alone, with no one around and two little bottles of wine there, just calling your name. Of course, I would already know without a doubt that I would have to go get more, much more. But I hope I don't find myself in that situation ever! I admire that you got through it.

                            It's funny, just talking about it fills me with a combination of fear and thoughts of AL, which have luckily been pretty dormant today. God, it's amazing how little it takes to awaken that beast! No doubt about it, AL is cunning, baffling & powerful. A very formidable foe. Thank God you are all here!
                            AF since 12/2/12
                            http://hamsnetwork.org/taper/

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                              Newbies Nest

                              Hang with us AF. We all have those thoughts going through our heads now and then. It gets better. It's good that we're all in this together.
                              ~nurdl
                              :notes:
                              we are human beings with alcohol problems not alcoholics with problems caused by drinking

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                                Newbies Nest

                                Good evening Nesters,

                                Please just remember this -
                                a thought is just a thought, you don't have to act on it!
                                When an AL thought pops up, recognize it & push it right out of your head. It works for me, I'm sure it will work for all of you

                                Star, good luck in your new position! Byrdie has been an excellent assistant nest mum....the more the merrier

                                Wishing everyone a comfy & safe night in the nest!
                                Lav
                                AF since 03/26/09
                                NF since 05/19/09
                                Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

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