Newbies Nest

[queen of denial]

Newbies Nest

im still here
today im starting day 17 AF

[ChickenNumber3]

Newbies Nest

HI Queen!
or should I say Isis?
Chicken

[TranqWilly]

Newbies Nest

Queen! Way to go.

Day 17 - what an incredible journey huh.

Chicken - I'm just waking up here = early round of golf today - no insects yet, breakfast not for another hour.

My dreams didn't give me any insights into your two avatar characters. Let me work on that one.

Off I go to get some birdies... bfn!
TW

[ChickenNumber3]

Newbies Nest

Yup well, me and the Mead made friends again tonight...dang it!!!!!!

Oh well, back on the bus again! Where is Sooty-I want to buy a ticket!'
*cluck*
It's still pm here!

[sooty]

Newbies Nest

Afternoon nesters. Lovely to be here again, the visitors have finally gone thank goodness, altho I did have some wine at our farewell meal last night, but straight back on my perch today!
Chicken tickets are free on the sober bus, I've got one with your name on it.
Queen well done on 17 days, you a right royal success.
Hi Maisie, hope you're keeping the coffee going - I'll have one white without sugar please.
Sunshine good news about your mum, hope she continues to make good progress and you coping with this without drinking shows how strong you are my dear.
Tranq just get right back on the bus - got a seat for you right up front.
Lav hows it going? Hope you're ok.
Warrior and Coach welcome to our nest, looking forward to getting to know you.
Things are ok in Sootyland, Mr Sooty gone to the cricket so house v peaceful.
Love to all of you xxxx

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Mid Morning Nesters,

Hope everyone had a comfy night here in the nest! We had 3" of rain over night so I'll be wearing my muck shoes today................

Greetings to our newest Newbies, Maisie, Paul & warrior - hope all is well in your neck of the nest!

Chicken - cleaning again? Please flap your wings and get over to my house. I could use your help, ha ha! Stay focused girl!
Queen, a big congrats to you on 17 days, awesome

TranqWilly, it broke my heart when we dropped our daughter off at college 4 1/2 hrs. away from home. I felt utterly alone being left with all male company - husband, son, dog, bird....... all males! It just wasn't the same after that
About the RLS thing! Personally with me, it's something that comes & goes. I suffered a pretty serious head injury, requiring surgery 9 years ago. For several months afterwards my legs visibly jumped all over the place, all day and all night. Thank God that went away. These days I occasionally have the creepy crawly feeling things during the daytime. Eeewww, they do creep me out!!
I have read that thyroid conditions and alcoholism are major contributors to RLS along with anything that causes mis-firing of the neurons in your brain (such as low iron levels). B/P meds (which I am on) and benzos (I take Benadryl at night) are supposed to provide some relief. GABA supplements, used here to control cravings & anxiety should provide relief as well. Overall, we should be able to control RLS by watching our intake of caffeine, alcohol, tobacco, etc and taking iron supps if needed, exercising, applying heat or cold, getting adequate sleel, etc.
OK - that's my .02 on RLS
Sounds like you passed your modding test, good for you. I'm not even willing to try because I'm 99.9% sure that I would just screw up and that is NOT an option for me. The longer I'm away from AL the less I miss it and that's OK for me.

Well, I need to get in gear here. Have a wonderful day one & all!
Lav

[Muddle]

Newbies Nest

Well, on to Day 3. I was very tempted have just one (yeah right) little glass of wine last night since I was feeling lonely, but resisted the urge. I'm glad because I now can call today Day 3, and not Day 1 again. Also, I'm a little skaky this morning, so I'm glad I didn't compound it with drinking.

This sounds silly, but before as soon as I stopped drinking the dark circles and puffiness left my eyes by the next day. I slept well last night, but woke up looking like something the cat drug in. Maybe I need more fluids for the puffiness? Will that help the dark circles, too? Any other ideas?

[openheart]

Newbies Nest

Hello my nest mates,
Day 5. Well, just getting triggered at 10:30 am by a spat w/ hubby. Went to reach for some tequila (don't normally drink that, but no wine in the house and knew there was a little airplane bottle of tequila somewhere) to use as a security blanket , but couldn't find it. So I found some cigs that I had bought long time ago to deal with a stressful time when we had a houseful of company and I was trying not to drink. Smoked a 1/2 one of those and feel pretty dizzy.

My hubby has been really good during this initial time of sobriety. Supportive and loving. But I think he had enough of my sensitivity this a.m. and reacted. It feels like he is always happy and enthused and talkative when *he* is talking and when it is about him or what *he* thinks. Interrupting me constantly--he talks fast and enthusiastically--I am more of a thinker, ponderer, slower more relaxed speaker. I think he gets impatient with me sometimes. I got hurt feelings and I think he just got tired of walking on eggshells around me. This process isn't easy on any of us, I s'pose.

I did a whole post to the nest this a.m., and it felt so good to reach out--but then I noticed that I must've forgotten to hit submit and it is gone--so--here I am having hoped for responses to my post, but alas you guys never got my post (pity party).

I really look forward to checking in with the nest in the a.m. and before bed and when I am having a tough time. Yesterday, Friday, I even checked the nest from work as it was a Friday and was out of my element as I wasn't going to go home and drink. Loved your posts--open, and tender and real. Thank you, all.

Have been feeling melancholic. Lavande--I really appreciate the health aspects that you share--it helps me so much to understand the chemistry of this process.

TranqW and Chicken--welcome back on the bus--wanna sit next to me? TW--I, too, am taking my child (son) to college next week. I get these pangs now and then and am anticipating a hole and some emptiness when he goes next week. It's a big step--we will be empty nesters. I am trying to focus on how it will feel to have a clean house without a teenager around to make their mark. I always love your posts, TW, they really speak to me. You have such a way of writing from the heart and in a way that makes so much sense to me.
Chicken--your posts are so fresh, honest and open and funny and you share your vulnerability in such a way that makes me care so much. You are showing me a way to give of myself which I have always retreated from. And I love your Avatar--and you created it? WOW! You are definitely creatively blessed and have a big heart.
Maisie--good for you for being strong last night--we are with you in post and spirit. Way to go on DAy 3!
Sooty--thanks for driving the bus--it's a relief to just sit back and ride.
Welcome, coach--very glad you found us--love the idea of a life coach. Will be looking forward to hearing more from you.

Well--I'm going to hit submit reply for sure this time. Have a smooth day, everyone. I will be checking back to nuzzle up to hear some soft chirping and feel the warmth of your fuzzy feathers.

Openheart:h:h:h:h:h

[warrior22]

Newbies Nest

On to Day Three

Got through second night AF. Evening was great, once I had set my mind to not drinking. All the kids had stuff going on with friends, so hubby and I were able to have dinner out together (a mini date). And the first time that I can remember, we had dinner out without ordering wine! I had worried before that it would be hard and we'd be bored. But No! It was great. Great dinner, nice talk, and then we were able to take a long drive exploring some back roads (we'd NEVER have done that after a bottle of wine --or more-- at dinner).

Once again the sleeping thing didn't go so well; tossing and turning for a couple of hours. And then my hubby (trying to be nice) let me sleep until 10 a.m.! That won't make sleeping tonight any easier. But I'm not complaining! A couple of sleepless hours is a small price to pay for waking up feeling great (not hung over), feeling good about myself. Despite my worries, I'm suffering no withdrawal effects at all (except for the insomnia). I think the supplements might be helping--I'm doing the full recommended set.

Tranquilly, I left my son at school last weekend, too. It's hard (he's 8 hours away), but I'm so excited for him! He's really jumping into the adventure of a new life, new choices, new experiences. Makes me wish I was going to college again! I miss him, and I call him way too often. I still have two daughters at home, though, so that makes it easier. Do you have younger ones at home still, or is he your last?

Maisie, I'll be keeping tabs on you. I think you and I started our AF time together.

------
2 days AF

[sunshine_gg]

Newbies Nest

Hello fledglings!

Warrior... WAY TO GO on day 3! See? No luck required!

Openheart... I think you are right... it is NOT easy for our loved ones, either. And, they DO feel like having to walk on egg shells... they want to but cannot possibly conceive what exactly it is we are going through and why it is so difficult. They want to help but often don't know how - and it doesn't help if WE don't communicate clearly what we need/want them to do.

Maisie... you're doing fabulous! Congrats and embrace the not finding Tequila as a sign

Lav, I'm with you... my failure is almost guaranteed if I try to moderate. Checked that one off the list. How's the Q-tip hair? :H

Sooty, glad you survived your company!

Chicken, my dear... LOL, I'll take the whole fam damily! I've got an ancient horse as well (33 this year)... maybe we can start a geriatric equine facility? :H

Queen... time to change your name... to Queen of Action! Big huge fat congrats on 17 days!

I'm on day 15, I believe. I'm starting to lose count and that's just fine with me. I want this to be a permanent state. Went to visit my 'new' horse this afternoon and picked up some hay for Miss Sophie. The new horse won't be mine until the Spring... no sense in getting him now, since I'll have to board for the winter (no barn here yet). But he's got my name on him and his current owner (a good friend of mine) will hand him over when I'm ready Although, he is not an attractive horse in my eyes... him and I have some sort of connection - had from the first time I walked up to him. He was badly abused before my friend got him outta there and bears permanent scars. A couple of months ago, I had one of THOSE rides with him... the kind I read about, but never experienced myself.... where you are thinking you might go this way... and your horse is already turning... where you inadvertently exhale and your horse ... stops! :H In short, a soft, subtle, willing, attentive horse, completely in sync with his rider. Just awesome.

K... enough babbling... I really should get SOMETHING accomplished today. Have a wonderful Saturday evening!

[queen of denial]

Newbies Nest

Tranqwilly,
if you don't mind me asking what was it like to drink after so many days AF?
i was at a local festival today and there was a lot of wine...I wanted some so bad and that old voice in my head started telling me i could just drink in MODERATION ..i was scared & i told myself i am allergic maybe later, maybe tomorrow and i left.
I have tried so many times to drink in moderation with no luck..

[Trailrunner]

Newbies Nest

Queen, me too! I may even moderate for a day, week or two, or a month, but I always end up at a point where I'm drinking at least 2-3 a night and usually 6-8 a night. Moderation isn't an option for my mental programming.

I'm on 7 days AF tonight! (Oh Yeah!) I still don't know that I'll go forever w/out AL, but I know it would take at least a LONG time being AF for me to reprogram my habits, through maturity, which means years-decade, whatever. I'm 31 and have been doing this since I was 15 so I'm still young, but will need a LONG time since I'm very prone to addiction. ODAT.

[Muddle]

Newbies Nest

Day 3 continues. I'm just so tired. I don't remember this total exhaustion when I stopped before. But, then the depression wasn't this bad either. It has been challenging finding an anti-depressant that works for me. The wine didn't really help the depression; it was more of a distraction. And I never knew what affect it would have--it either made me totally happy or hysterically sobbing. But then I'd have to deal with both the depression and the guilt the next day over the stupid things I'd say. I've ruined potential friendships. I'm not really tempted to drink tonight, but just want to feel like other people do. I've had issues with depression on and off since childhood. It was a long time before I realized that not everyone hurts this much inside for no real reason.

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters!

How's everyone?
Lav (the retired nurse) feels the need to have a little talk with anyone that may benefit from my experience. If not, please feel free to ignore this
Back in January I dumped the Rx antidepressant Lexapro for the last time. I think I was on my 3rd or 4th trial with that stuff. I was anxious, frustrated, depressed and still drinking. You know what happens when you drink & take Lexapro everyday? You make an ass out of yourself & fall down a lot!! I mentioned this once before - the last time that happened was Christmas Eve, how embarrasing! I started on a good, natural herbal product called Amoryn. It took a while but it really did the trick, took care of the depression & the anxiety. By March I was ready to go AF and have stayed AF since!
I wanted to mention this just so everyone knows that there are safe options out there, things you can do for yourself especially when your MD doesn't understand the extent of you suffering. Did I mention that I have left my chosen profession after 27 years of service? It was time to take care of ME
If you're at all interested look at: AMORYN Mood Booster | Natural Antidepressant | Supplement for Depression & Anxiety

Maisie, congrats on your 3 days, well done! The puffy eyes will probably resolve by keeping yourself well hydrated and watching your salt intake - always does with me!
openheart, you are doing very well too, good for you! Take a look at the Amoryn, it will chase away the blues, honestly.
Warrior, 3 days, can you believe it? I'm very happy for you, keep up the great work!
Sunni - my Q-Tip hair could win 1st prize today, OMG!
Hi queen, hope you are well!
Trailrunner, you've got 7 days, awesome! Be proud & happy!

Wishing everyone a fantastic, restful, safe night in the nest. Sorry for the lecture.
BTW - I do not work for the company that makes Amoryn - just love their product and wanted to share

[dill]

Newbies Nest

Hey, Lav, I was on Lexapro a couple years back for depression. I had hoped that it would help me quit drinking. I had the opposite. My drinking got worse and the alc affect was much stronger. I decided to go off the lexapro, so I did it gradually, but not gradually enough! Geesh, the withdrawal was horrible. Hallucinations, palpitations, ... I think it messed up my thyroid, because I ended up with over active thyroid for a while that summer. It's back to normal now, thank god!

I'm going to look into the Amoryn. Thanks!