Why is it.....

[sdlovespackers]

HI All!!
Ok...so I ordered all my stuff like Wednesday or Thursday...I don't remember...and don't get me wrong, totally want to make the change...but why is it since I ordered I have drank more than I did before?? Almost like "hurry...do all you can before you need to stop or learn to moderate"....I'm not sure yet...I'm guessing ...for me...it's all or nothing, but I don't want to tell myself that cuz that freaks me out more than anything else...why???? I dunno. I just tell myself "do moderation"...we'll see where it goes from there....I think if I feel the success of that...I won't be so afraid to go the next step...how in the hell did I let this consume me???!!!
Grrrrrrrr!!

[Hoosierdaddy]

Why is it.....

I think it comes down to wanting it

After waking up at 3 AM with anxiety several times after drinking and feeling like crap all of the time and the growing health concerns I said enough is enough. I have tried to quit before and ended up going back to moderation and then to a regular 12 -pack drinker. I did that because that was my lifestyle and what my friends and I did and it was fun -- but it was adding up.

I found the old AA expression very poignant one day, "I am sick and tired of being sick and tired". It is became so real that I had to choose: health and happiness or start drinking earlier and earlier until something happens -- sickness, DUI, loss of job, loss of family (not abusive or anything but still not a good thing to be drunk all the time), and worst of all -- loss of myself.

The tapes, supplements and support will help when you decide you want to stop and to stop for you and be willing to fight the beast. At least that is my take....good luck and read alot of the posts -- they help for perspective.

[Kirova]

Why is it.....

sdlove -- When I've quit AL in the past (multiple times), I'd typically go "all out" the night before -- sort of like a "last fling." Not sure what the point was because it always made me feel like crap on my first day AF (oxymoron considering all the AL coursing through my system). I've written elsewhere that moderation didn't work for me -- even after 3 years AF. I agree with others that we're wired differently. I know at least for me, once I have a little, I think I can have a little more, and that turns into a lot more. Try not to freak out about what lies ahead....just focus on today. That's where you'll find success. The supps have worked for a lot of us, and I hope they work for you as well. Many hands and hearts are here to support you.

Hoosierdaddy, I can totally relate to "I am sick and tired of being sick and tired." That was what drove my decision to stop. Here's to fighting the beast!

[j-vo]

Why is it.....

sdlove,
Good decision to make your life better. We only have one to live, so let's live it to the fullest. And I can totally relate when you say, "get it all in now!" That's ok. When you start, do it ODAT. Every morning, wake up and say, I'm not gonna drink today. Or, I don't drink. Read the book thoroughly so you can develop a plan that will work for yourself. If that plan doesn't work, go onto plan B. I know that when I started here, my ideas of where I wanted to go with this drinking thing were so different from what I want now. It changes, and you need to recognize when you need to make the changes. Good luck.

[FloridaBoy]

Why is it.....

sdlovespackers;524567 wrote: HI All!!
Ok...so I ordered all my stuff like Wednesday or Thursday...I don't remember...and don't get me wrong, totally want to make the change...but why is it since I ordered I have drank more than I did before?? Almost like "hurry...do all you can before you need to stop or learn to moderate"....I'm not sure yet...I'm guessing ...for me...it's all or nothing, but I don't want to tell myself that cuz that freaks me out more than anything else...why???? I dunno. I just tell myself "do moderation"...we'll see where it goes from there....I think if I feel the success of that...I won't be so afraid to go the next step...how in the hell did I let this consume me???!!!Grrrrrrrr!!

:welcome: A lot of us seem to be wired differently...we have no AL off switch. Just the way it is. Read a lot of posts here and you will most likely 'find yourself'. Once I realized that the hangover lasts longer than the buzz the decision was easy.

[river0123]

Why is it.....

SD, I also did what you did. I drank more than ever when I knew I was about to try quitting. I had all the stuff on hand, just not quite ready to wave the white flag. Looking back I can see that it was all leading up to this disastrous "crescendo". My last night drinking I barely woke up in time to vomit and gashed my wrist on the dresser. I'm grateful every day my kids didn't wake up to find me dead that way.
I just wanted to say I do understand that "rush" to drink all you can before you can't. But this sober life is so sweet compared to where I was and I am grateful every day for MWO. I wish you the best.