MWO PROGRAM thread

[1morechance]

MWO PROGRAM thread

:upset:I'm a screw up
I drank last night and I'm paying for it today:upset: My partner is very upset today and just said "I'm sick of you" I'm sick of myself, why do I continue to do this to myself and my relationship I feel like crying and just hide under a rock, I hate my life at this moment. Please God help me. I know I should be able to beat this but right now I feel beat down and I don't know if I'll be able to continue trying:upset:

Please help me I can't continue doing this to myself

[dill]

MWO PROGRAM thread

1mc, YES you CAN and WILL keep trying! I mean it! You don't want to let the addiction rule your life. I know it's hard. I keep falling down along the way, too. I get disgusted and mad and frustrated too. But we can keep getting up and continue the fight! We are in this together 1mc! Don't you dare leave me to struggle without you. I love hearing from you here.

[1morechance]

MWO PROGRAM thread

thanks dill
you post brought tears of joy to my eyes, knowing that you're out there supporting me and we all support each other in times of needs. i will NOTgive up. i'm feeling better this afternoon. i've spent most of my day here and got some great support. thanks dill it means alot to me to hear from you. we will get through this together, i was just feeling sorry for myself, but i'm back and ready to keep on keeping on

[cuckoosnest83]

MWO PROGRAM thread

1MC, if any of us knew why we continue to do this to ourselves we wouldn't need sites such as this. I don't care what you call this thing be it a disease, an addiction, AL, a demon, whatever none of us would be here if it were such an easy thing to abstain from or control. 1MC, I have been on this site over a year and I still am not AF but I'm doing so much better than I was when I drank every night for 16 years. At least I have over a 100 days AF since joining this site. There are still many days I wake up hungover and disgusted with myself but come here and know I will find people that are going through the very same thing that I am and trying just as hard as I am to conquer this addiction. I think what we each need to do on this thread is begin to really, really focus on March. I'm taking the supps but will get my book, my cd's, and plan on starting the program again with a renewed sense of dedication to getting myself better. Spring is a mere 4 weeks away and I think we should each commit ourselves to achieving AF for spring. What better way to celebrate the renewal of the earth than by celebrating a renewal of ourselves. Hang in there, girl. I'm having a rough go of it too but from your posts I get a sense of a very strong woman and I know you can do this.

[dill]

MWO PROGRAM thread

Cuckoo, You know I have been struggling here lately, too, and have been weak at times. I agree with you about re-committing ourselves to an AF Spring!

Spring is a mere 4 weeks away and I think we should each commit ourselves to achieving AF for spring. What better way to celebrate the renewal of the earth than by celebrating a renewal of ourselves.

I'm with you.

[cuckoosnest83]

MWO PROGRAM thread

Dill, I think we all have been struggling and I think there is a fear of letting each other down which makes it hard for us to admit when we are struggling. It is comforting for me to know I am not in this alone and I look forward to an AF spring. We can do this! We just need to decide who or what is going to have control of our lives. Will it be us or will it be alcohol. I choose us.

[cuckoosnest83]

MWO PROGRAM thread

I love music and I find I can always find a song to relate to how I am feeling. I think this is a great song for us going forward. The title is "Don't Let Yourself Down"


Lyrics.com - your music community with the largest searchable lyrics database.

[dill]

MWO PROGRAM thread

Great song, Cuckoo! I love music too. It's really helpful.

[1morechance]

MWO PROGRAM thread

thanks cuckoo and dill. i'm feeling much better today no AL last night. thank you for your support. i'm off to work will check in later

[1morechance]

MWO PROGRAM thread

I'm also re-committing myself to AF spring. thanks cuckoo. I don't know what I woud do with all the support i get here. you're are right, i'm a strong woman and i can do this. we can all do this, we are strong and we will beat this! no AL today!!!

[cuckoosnest83]

MWO PROGRAM thread

Dill and 1MC, listened to the subliminal cd last night and plan on listening to the cleansing one tonight. I've also bought a journal because I plan to write in it everyday about my triggers, feelings, temptations, etc. I belonged to a small gym in a strip mall that recently closed so yesterday I went and signed up at another local gym. When I went AF for over 32 days last year I bought alcohol free wine so when I wanted something with dinner or after work and water or tea wasn't cutting it, I would pour myself a small glass of the free wine. It helped me curb some of the social cravings of alcohol. I just bought a bottle of red and white the other day. I'm approaching this as if I am arming myself for battle and trying hard to anticipate any obstacle.

Let's rock spring 2009.

[1morechance]

MWO PROGRAM thread

hey cuckoo that sounds like a good plan. i have a journal i bought awhile ago but never used. I'm going to take it out and do the same. i've never tried the AF wine, i'll give it a try this weekend. I am determined to give this another try we can do this ladies, this is going to be a great spring.

[startingover]

MWO PROGRAM thread

Hey 1MC, you sound great today! So much better than yesterday...I am so happy for you!

[1morechance]

MWO PROGRAM thread

Thanks Startingover, I got lots of support and feeling much better today. It hasn't been easy but it will get better.

[dill]

MWO PROGRAM thread

Cuckoo, you sound like you are really getting psyched up! I have been listening to the CDs pretty regularly, but what I am doing wrong is, I wait until bedtime to listen. I often fall asleep about halfway through. I am going to get to bed a few minutes earlier so I can stay with it! I really think they help. I am also thinking about looking into meditation. Something I can do on a quick break at work. Work is a huge trigger for me. I am a quiet person, and fairly tranquil. I work with a bunch of women in various school settings. I am a day here, a day there, because I am a school speech therapist. Anyway, because I am quiet and calm, everybody talks at me, not to me, but at me. It's like they are just releasing their stresses, and I absorb them. I almost feel like a tree being pecked at by woodpeckers. Do you understand what I mean? Anyway. I need to take more personal breaks at work so as not to be stressed out. I like all these people and care about them. I guess that's why they talk to me. It's OK, but it's not good for me just now.