I can be brutally honest with myself. Or here. Or even with ONE friend in 'real life'.
But not with my mate, my parents (who DO know - I did tell them I have a problem) or other very close friends... I can not. When Mr. Wonderful brings up, or even just asks how I am doing... I almost panic. I want to hide. I'm SO ashamed, I feel so humiliated, and there is also a bit of defiance 'Leave me alone, I don't want to talk about it' kinda feeling.
I don't think this is good or healthy. For me OR for the ones living with me. But just the thought (right now, even) of really spelling it all out brings up tears. Why?
Am I alone in this? Anyone else feel like this?
Comment