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    #1

    Feeling Bitter?

    Morning, Afternoon, Evening to all,
    I would love some insights into how you cope with the feelings of anger/bitterness towards those that can drink. I don't take it out on anyone ( not that I am aware ) I just get really frustrated and feel spiteful towards people who can drink...eg...walking past a cafe/pub on a weekend and seeing people laughing and drinking and I think " Yeah keep laughing B**ch". I mean that is just so awful to even think, I am not like that with anything else. I understand it is normal to feel this envy but thought maybe you could put a spin on it to put it into a better prespective?
    Much Appreciated :h
    Sez
    Sober since Jan 17th 09
    Smoke free since 20th Nov 08 :H
    Tags: None
    #2
    Feeling Bitter?

    Hi WannaB!

    Hmm... to be honest, I don't feel like that. Anger or bitterness towards 'normal' drinkers.

    I'll go back to what I've said a few times in the last little while... I view my condition as an allergy to alcohol. I can't drink. As if I couldn't eat peanuts. Or shrimp. No need to have misgivings.
    Okay, WHO put a stop payment on my reality check?

    Winning since October 24th, 2013

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      #3
      Feeling Bitter?

      I used to get 'jealous' of people sat outside the pub drinking. The pub was opposite work and I could see them through the window.
      Listen for God's voice in everything you do, everywhere you go; He's the one who will keep you on track. Proverbs 3:6 The Message

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        #4
        Feeling Bitter?

        I used to have really 'bitter' feelings towards people, who, on a Monday morning would boast about how drunk they got at the weekend. I used to say, 'Well, I had a totally alcohol free weekend!!!'
        Listen for God's voice in everything you do, everywhere you go; He's the one who will keep you on track. Proverbs 3:6 The Message

        Comment

          #5
          Feeling Bitter?

          Sez, not sure if this will help at all but here are a couple of my personal thoughts on that topic. (and I totally understand what you are talking about!!)

          1) I came to the realization that for me, there is no "get to drink." I'm an addict, and if I have one drink that means I "have to drink" more. Having to drink is no fun. I remember so clearly how my entire life revolved around alcohol. I have absolutely no interest in going back there.

          2) It is SO important that we fill the space in our lives that used to be filled with drinking activities with something else. I don't long to sit in a bar because I now have more interesting and fun things to do. But that doesn't just happen - you have to get out there and make it happen. Explore the world you didn't have time for when drinking!

          Best wishes,
          DG
          Sobriety Date = 5/22/08
          Nicotine Free Date = 2/27/07

          One day at a time.

          Comment

            #6
            Feeling Bitter?

            I really don't miss drinking or envy those who drink. Occasionally I feel left out a bit when my friends are having a glass of wine, and remarking on how good it is... but I am very much aware that drinking it really doesn't make them any happier or better off than they would be without it... and that if I were to drink it, it would be a disaster. So... really, it just isn't that big a deal. Learning that alcohol is just not something that enhances life, or that, if absent, diminishes life... that's part of outgrowing the childish dependency we all had/have on the stuff. It's good to let it go.

            Comment

              #7
              Feeling Bitter?

              I've never really been angry/mad at people who could drink. I was angry/mad at myself because I couldn't drink the way they do. After way too many wasted yrs of trying to mod or control my drinking I realized I didn't want to drink the way they do. I never wanted to have a drink and stop. I once told someone I wouldn't get a glass dirty for just one drink. I'm an addict and that's the way my mind works. One is too many and 10000 are not enough.
              It actually took alot of pressure of once I came to that realization. I have to reajust my life the way a diabetic would have to.
              AF since 7/26/2009




              "There is nothing noble in being superior to other man. The true nobility is being superior to your previous self."--Hindu proverb.

              "Sobriety isn't a landing but rather a journey." anonymous

              Comment

                #8
                Feeling Bitter?

                I don't really feel bitter toward anyone...just alittle anger with AL, himself...I guess that I was alittle jealous when people were drinking egg nog/whiskey over the holidays...I bought some flavor extract a got the taste that I was sooo craving. I was afraid it might send me on a binge but I was fine...ate tons of cookies and was glad to be sober.
                sigpicEyes on the PRIZE, a SOBER Future !!!

                Comment

                  #9
                  Feeling Bitter?

                  A lot of wonderful advice on this thread. Thanks to all. Yes, I am jealous of people who can have a drink and not get swept away. But I can't. So I hope that I never do again. Good luck!
                  Matt

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                    #10
                    Feeling Bitter?

                    Have you gone AF yet Wannabe? I know that I used to feel that way when I was still drinking and trying to stop. The AL still had its hold, I didn't really want to stop and I was really envying the others who didn't have to stop. When I went AF those feelings left me, because I realised that I was happier with drink. By not even having to drink those feelings become irrevelant, as do a lot of others.

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                      #11
                      Feeling Bitter?

                      A Work in Progress;537040 wrote: I really don't miss drinking or envy those who drink. Occasionally I feel left out a bit when my friends are having a glass of wine, and remarking on how good it is... but I am very much aware that drinking it really doesn't make them any happier or better off than they would be without it... and that if I were to drink it, it would be a disaster. So... really, it just isn't that big a deal. Learning that alcohol is just not something that enhances life, or that, if absent, diminishes life... that's part of outgrowing the childish dependency we all had/have on the stuff. It's good to let it go.
                      brilliant!

                      Comment

                        #12
                        Feeling Bitter?

                        i sometimes feel jealous, but then i wonder if they are like i was and maybe struggling with a serious problem themselves...so many people drink alot, and we can't be the only ones who felt the need to stop.

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                          #13
                          Feeling Bitter?

                          oh yeah

                          I have to admit I do resent people who can have 1-2 drinks and stop. It's because I am jealous!

                          I also feel bitter toward those skinny little things who say "Oooo, I ate SOOO much yesterday and gaind half an ounce and I am so scared I will be a size 2 or 4 tomorrow!"

                          I can only wish upon those girls a serious UTI or yeast infection! :H

                          Comment

                            #14
                            Feeling Bitter?

                            Hahahhahaha.. UpNorth... yeah, I can emphasize with the scrawny girlie jealousy!
                            Hmm.. wishing a yeast infection on someone.. never thought of it ... thanks! :H
                            Okay, WHO put a stop payment on my reality check?

                            Winning since October 24th, 2013

                            Comment

                              #15
                              Feeling Bitter?

                              I'm with Peacenik on this one, I look and wonder how many at that table are struggling with al - it's really not that uncommon.

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