Why am I not as strong as all of you

[Blanchieboo]

I want to know how you are all so strong....
I come on this forum every day....I don't always post because I have been drinking and I don't feel worthy.
Most of the posts I read are people who are strong and not drinking. I don't even want to hear it sometimes...how everyone is AF and doing great...... Tell me how to get there.
I AM SO FRUSTRATED AND TIRED OF THIS..... I dont get drunk everyday, but I drink everyday....I know it is a problem, and I know I can stop, but I dont.
What is it? I feel helpless.
I start the day knowing I will not drink and I end the day drinking.
Please help

[aprilmoon]

Why am I not as strong as all of you

Blanch,

I'm new to this AF life. It's hard. I wanted to drink last night so bad I could almost taste it. I went to bed still wanting to drink.

I got up this morning and decided that I was going to have a good day. I have had a good day.

I wish you the best. You can do this. We can do this.

[Seacailin]

Why am I not as strong as all of you

Hi Blanchie
I can so relate to that feeling of helplessness. I have been told that I have to want to be sober more than I want to keep drinking. My life had become so unmanageable and my health was deteriorating. I felt that I had to stop. I still have slips, but have had more sober days in the past 7 months with MWO and AA than I have had in the past 5 years. Do you have a plan for sobriety? Let us know how we can be of help. You are not weak. You just have to be ready.:l

[j-vo]

Why am I not as strong as all of you

Sounds familiar to me Blanchie. I think starting off slowly, with small, short-term goals may help. I don't think you should think long-term about not drinking. That's always thrown me off. Make your goals attainable. Write some things down, things that you want to see yourself doing. What is the time of day that you begin drinking? A diversion at that time is a must. Change around your schedule a little. Go out shopping when you usually have a drink. Small, attainable goals. Write down your successes. They will come, a little at a time.

[keeta]

Why am I not as strong as all of you

Blanchieboo

I am one of the "not so strong ones" as well so I am likely not the one you wanted to hear from. But I just wanted you to know you are NOT alone.

When it comes to remaining AF, I still don't feel strong, and every day I have to make a solid choice to not drink. I still work hard at it, still make the positive affirmations when offered AL..."no thanks, I don't drink", and keep myself busy during times I normally drink. I am taking lots of suppliments, and trying to exercise. What sort of things are you doing?

There is a "Tool Box" thread in monthly Abs.

You CAN do this. Just keep faking it until it comes naturally

I wish you all the best in reaching your goals, Bb!

[Pan]

Why am I not as strong as all of you

Blanchie, get all alcohol out of the house and don't buy any more. Do it one day at a time. You say you know you can stop but you don't. I stopped by not having alcohol in the house. Not there, I can't drink it. I'm 21 days AF but I would really like a drink now. If I had alcohol in the house, I may find myself having a glass of wine. But I don't. Take the temptation away.

[Still_Fighting]

Why am I not as strong as all of you

I like what j-vo said. Make one small step at a time. Many times to distract myself I will go out to eat instead of sitting at home. If I'm having a craving, I have to go somewhere that doesn't serve alcohol. It can be as expensive as drinking, but after I'm full the craving diminishes significantly, AND it'll be one night I can count as sober.

Also, I think you're focusing alot on the people who have been successful staying sober. After looking around the site for a few weeks, it looks to me like there are alot more people on this site who are still working on their sobriety, so don't feel too out of place.

I've worked really hard, and haven't been able to go more than 8 straight days alcohol free. But I keep trying, working on that formula that will work for me. Where I'm at right now, I know you have to have a serious plan in place, and you really have to work it. Right now I'm thinking I have to focus alot on all the elements of the program, EVERY DAY, no matter how good I feel. I must exercise, listen to a hypnosis CD and take supplements every-single-day for a few weekds (and I have no idea if that will get me where I want to be).

Don't beat yourself up. Each time you try, you learn what works for you and what doesn't. Don't use a day of drinking as a discouragement. Forgive yourself and use it as a learning tool which can (hopefully) make you stronger. This way you learn about what works on good days, and what fails on bad days. Above all you've got to start your program with a real desire (which you clearly have) and a definite plan. I know, it sure is a huge struggle.

I look forward to hearing what first step you come up with,
Still Fighting

[aprilmoon]

Why am I not as strong as all of you

panicked;556924 wrote: Blanchie, get all alcohol out of the house and don't buy any more. Do it one day at a time. You say you know you can stop but you don't. I stopped by not having alcohol in the house. Not there, I can't drink it. I'm 21 days AF but I would really like a drink now. If I had alcohol in the house, I may find myself having a glass of wine. But I don't. Take the temptation away.

I had to get the rum out of my house too. If I had some last night, I would have drank it.

[Angelcakes]

Why am I not as strong as all of you

hey blanchie...I think a lot of people (like you said & like me) just don't post when they've been drinking...so it makes sense that your gonna hear mostly positive stuff here.
You've probably cut down your drinking since you've been here?? so that's an improvement right?? Look at each & every drink you DIDN'T have as an achievement - there's probably quite a few.

xo

[coda]

Why am I not as strong as all of you

After my Sunday incident, I dumped the vodka down the toilet. I think this is the best advice. Get rid of every last drop. I wouldn't have a hope if I had *any* here. I have a bottle of Marsala (cooking) wine. I'm seriously thinking of ditching that too as I don't trust these urges.

[Angelcakes]

Why am I not as strong as all of you

ditch it coda

xo

[startingover]

Why am I not as strong as all of you

Hi there Blanchie, I was wondering where you were hun.
Firstly, you are NOT a failure, I think most people go through that time when they know they should stop drinking but find it so difficult to motivate themselves to stop. I know I went for years and years feeling that way. Stopping for hours or a day, and then feeling bad because I couldnt continue. What finally stopped me was a defining moment when I got alchohol poisoning. I thought I was going to die. Then I decided that come hell or high water I was not going to drink again. It was so hard, i didnt feel strong, I felt my life as I knew it was over, good and bad...I felt I had a nothing life if that makes sense. Over time I am realisng that I have to make a new life for myself, without drugs and drink and whatever comes up I no longer have that option to numb.
You will do this when your time is right, you've done it before, can you remember your defining moment then?
Whatever you do, stop beating yourself up for not feeling a certain way, that will never help you. PM me if you want to talk.
Take care x

[akgirl]

Why am I not as strong as all of you

I feel just like you. Really not as motivated as I should be.


I will do it for my son.......baby steps, it will happen.

:l
Ak

[rustop61]

Why am I not as strong as all of you

Blanchie

You have been given lots of great advice. Lots of us have been in the same position. I know how tempting it is to keep drinking and stay away but dont. I also know how frustrating it feels to see everyone else achieving longer AF time but we all had to start somewhere. I came from drinking a bottle of wine every day and have had more AF time since joining MWO than in the last 20 years. Baby steps, take it ODAT and stick at it, there are lots of us in the same boat. Good luck.

Rustop

[garlando]

Why am I not as strong as all of you

Hey, Blanchie, this may sound stupid, but dump all your alcohol and only go to the shop first thing in the morning. Do not go in the afternoon because then you will by AL. I'm really not someone to talk as I've not been great lately. I also wake up with the strongest of convictions and any stupid thing idea can change my mind. On day three (again) though and hoping for the best.