So today day seven i had the conversation that my hubby has been afraid to have...about me not drinking all week...and the fact that i wont be drinking again.And he was like what never? and he made me feel that all of this has been in my head?? and in fact the problems with my drinking have been very real..the rows, and the fact he loves telling me the next day what i did..is this called enabling? i think he prefers me drinking that it makes him feel more powerful and "above me", i told him al isnt a part of my life anymore, i dont smoke havent for three years so why would i want to start smoking in the future? by the way he doesnt drink, well hardly, i feel deflated i suppose...but i havent done this for him or the kids ive done it for me. i just wanted to write this down and i wonder if anyone elses partners have been this way?...oh and he said "well yre not alchololic are u?" when its so obvious i had a drink problem..
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When you can look a thing in the eye,
Acknowledge that it exists,
Call it exactly what it is,
And decide what role it will play in your life,
Then my beloved,
You have taken the first step toward your freedom.
Iyanla Vanzant -
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Shelley, I'm sorry your husband wasn't more supportive for you, but you're doing the right thing coming here for support from people who understand. I can't share any experience I'm afraid, I'm single and have no support but other people here have partners so hopefully they'll be able to share with you.
But anyway, you're doing brilliantly - day 7, woohoo!! Well done! Keep going, stay strong!
LO -
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It's not easy to tell people what it's like, and no one who hasn't been there really understands anyway. Maybe it's best to simply put the thoughts on the shelf and keep your resolve. For me it's like the elephant in the room, but it must be a pink elephant because my spouse doesn't see it, never did and probably never will. Doesn't change what I'm doing, but it does make for odd conversation sometimes.Comment
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Hi shelley
I have a similar problem with my husband ..he like to go out and to club and we likes to have a drink or two or three but thats it...he just like the night club atmosphere ,but when i tell him i have to stop drinking he says he will be there for me and will support me and help me..but come fridays night he will go out ! he needs that he doesnt have a problem to stop and we are in the restaurant business so at night after a busy night he will drink a few glass a wine to relieve his stress...he really does want to help but really doesnt...:beach:Comment
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nobody that is not an alcoholic, could posssibly ever understad us, and never will...I go through this same thing with parents/friends... thats why we have to stick together, we are all we have is each other!Comment
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