Dont think I can do this

[Doggygirl]

Dont think I can do this

Functional, I applaud you for seeking resources to help you sort out your relationship with alcohol. I had to end mine and I don't regret one moment of the difficulty.

I wasted YEARS pondering the question of whether I had a "drinking problem" or not. In the middle of the night, I would lay awake in bed and actually use the word that scared me, and I would wonder if were an alcoholic.

You know what? Truly NORMAL DRINKERS - those people who can take or leave a drink, and can have only ONE drink with no difficulty, DO NOT LAY IN BED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT WONDERING IF THEY HAVE A DRINKING PROBLEM as I did SO many nights.

Somebody pointed that out to me just a few days ago, and I had one of those "aha" moments. I wish I would have figured out the truth and simplicity of that a long, long time ago.

Only you can decide if you have a problem or not - but thought you might enjoy that tidbit of a "duh" moment that I recently had!

Best wishes to you.

DG

[Lonely One]

Dont think I can do this

Just wanted to add to the welcomes, Functional. I'm like you, and Blue, and so many others here - single parent holding it all together, and drinking way to much. Coming here and admitting that was hard but also was step one for me - saying "I know I have a problem" led to "how am I going to fix that?" and with the help of people here, I'm creeping towards fixing it.

I can only repeat the advice given above - read a lot, post, ask questions; check out the MWO book, the Toolbox thread, and join us on the ODAT thread if you think it would help. I find it v helpful

Take care
LO

[Boss.man]

Dont think I can do this

Functional - the drinking is causing the panic attacks. If/when you stop, they will continue for 3-5 days or so. But after that they will decrease considerably.

I also found when I was drinking my world got very small. I could only focus on basic functions, work, food, home, and limited family responsibilities. I felt like life had no meaning. Only after AL did my world open up again and I regained a curiosity and engagement with day-to-day living.

Please think about it. You owe it to yourself to end the anxiety and regain a richer personal life.

[Evie.Lou]

Dont think I can do this

Welcome Functional, We are here to support your goals...what ever they are. If you think you are drinking too much then that is a pretty good sign that you are drinking too much.
I recommend that you read and reread the MWO book so you will understand the program and then, if it is possible for you to stop for a month and see how you feel about it at that point then that might be a good way to get started. This site has lots of information about going alcohol free or learning to drink moderately. Stick close and read and post lots. I look forward to getting to know you.

[peacenik]

Dont think I can do this

Boss.man;576271 wrote: Functional - the drinking is causing the panic attacks. If/when you stop, they will continue for 3-5 days or so. But after that they will decrease considerably.

I also found when I was drinking my world got very small. I could only focus on basic functions, work, food, home, and limited family responsibilities. I felt like life had no meaning. Only after AL did my world open up again and I regained a curiosity and engagement with day-to-day living.

Please think about it. You owe it to yourself to end the anxiety and regain a richer personal life.

well said boss...drinking is soooo limiting, sobriety is freeing!

[redhibiscus]

Dont think I can do this

Welcome functional. I too suffered from panic attacks, and found out that alcohol affects the central nervous system, and during withdrawal my body would experience anxiety like you would not believe. This program is very helpful, but it is not magic. It is a program that addresses mind, body and emotions. Get the book and if you decide to get the supplements, note that the Calms Forte helps with anxiety. Also, the CDs have helped me to learn to relax. I started out drinking 5 to 6 days a week, slowly tapering off to 1 to 2 days a week. I have finally been AF the last 35 days and it is a miracle. I feel good physically, I am calm emotionally, and I am again in love with life. Please know that exploring MWO will help you on your journey. The people on this site are amazing. Good luck.

[Yogamomma]

Dont think I can do this


Another chimer-in for ya' functional. Am right there with you on the wine front but I also had/have a worse enemy...the dangerous mix of Red Bull Energy Drink and Vodka. The buzz but the false security of being alert and no slurs (for the first 4-5). I could finish my part-time job responsibilities and have one with lunch. Then one after I picked up my kid from school. One before the afternoon happenings. One while I cooked dinner. Then the bottle of wine with supper. Then another RBV or 2 at night time. A compounding problem with the anxiety here was a LOAD of added caffeine. I'd be waking up all night wondering if I'd ticked off my husband (based on, in my mind, how far away he was from me in our king sized bed), wondering if I'd spoken to my mom on the phone that night, testing myself if I could remember what I'd read to my kid at bedtime...I could make it ALL happen FUNCTIONALLY. But sooooooo DIS-functionally.

No big superhero story yet...I'm only on day 2 AF but day 4 without my super cocktail (had a glass of wine and 1/2 beer on St. Patty's Day). I'm already feeling great but am facing a Friday night with the fam...we usually get some video games or a movie and a bottle of wine and enjoy relaxing together. My strength will come, hopefully, in trying to cheerfully create that event w/out drinking. Or perhaps I can pray deeply and be able to just squeeze by with ONE glass of wine. Don't know if I'm that strong yet!

BUT!! Am soooo proud of myself for getting to day 2. I'm a fitness instructor (ironic, isn't it?) and over the past two days I've felt clear-minded in my instructions and not so "false" in my "live as you teach"-ings.

I've just found this welcoming place, functional. It has gotten me to day 2. I start my day here...visit midday...and try to seg in before the day is through. For me, it serves as a reminder of the "why" am I doing this, for the "what" I am shooting for (reading all the success stories), and the "who" else is out there that is JUST LIKE ME. No one likes to be floating around in a sea of struggle alone...and I've found that I am not!
:new:

[OverIt2007]

Dont think I can do this

No one likes to be floating around in a sea of struggle alone...and I've found that I am not!



So true!!! We are here for one another, and we do understand what your going thorough.


Good Luck!


:welcome:

[spedteach]

Dont think I can do this

I agree with you so much. I would think that the alcohol was calming me down, helping me cope when it was really so much of the source of my anxiety and panic. Especially in the middle of the night. Or when I was interacting with other people I was always thinking do they know I've been drinking?
spedteach

[IAD]

Dont think I can do this

It's funny ( but not funny ! ) My friends use to ask me.....how much Tequilla I wanted....I'ld say 2 fingers worth.....then opened my two fingers wide! ( Stupid.....IAD ) (Just a passing thought.....IAD )

[help4me]

Dont think I can do this

Functional, I can totally relate to where you are, but in my case, my husband and family are on their last leg with me. Don't let your drinking get to that point. It's not a good place. I've read the MWO book and have been following the program for just about a week and feel so much better. You definately have to get to a point where YOU want this. I know for years, I just kept "trying to quit", but it never lasted more than a couple days. The hypno CD's that are available here have been a great relief to me. I'm finding myself wanting to rush home ....to listen to them (not drink my wine!) Stay close. I know I am.

[42cat]

Dont think I can do this

Functional ... I could have written your post almost word-for-word, except my drink of choice is rum (or vodka) and diet (lol - as if that helps) coke.

Seriously ... I could feel myself in your post. The driving. The panic. The difference a drink makes in that regard.

I'm still struggling. I wish I had the perfect words, but I'm still trying to find them myself. BUT ... I do want to say ... don't give up the fight .... You / We WILL get there.

I just edited this to say one thing .... I had a blood test not too long ago that turned up elevated liver enzymes that scared me .... and I cut down/out the booze ... and it made all the difference with the driving and anxiety thing. Just had to get through a day or two of the "tireds" and it felt awesome.

I'm not saying I haven't relapsed a little .. (I have) ... but I know how good it felt ... And it's not that far away time-wise ... just a few days ... a few days! If you can get through the couple of days of "blah", you'll be on your way.

Fight it .... Fight for what you want ... I am. Let's do it.

[shelley1]

Dont think I can do this

so true boss man...well said

[Functional Drunk]

Dont think I can do this

Thank you guys so much for your support...it is so humbling ... I feel like a loser amongst people that have made it...I am so buzzed right now and dont regret it but I will in the morning...when when when will it hit me that I cannot continue this way...I love my bf and my son and daughter so much ....I feel like I make it through the day and help them and then at night I drink and fail.....So not ready to stop ....dont think I ever will be able to...but I so do want to be better. I am a good person and have a lot of love to give but I dont know why wine is my life....HELP ME!! I cannot lose the things I love so much...

[peacenik]

Dont think I can do this

but you might if you continue on this path...think about it...you know what you need, you know what your kids needs.

i never thought i could quit and it's taken alot of time and alot more energy, but before i wasted so much energy on drinking!

my night time panics attacks are GONE. i would wake up and worry and my heart would race and i thought i was going to die...now i sleep soundly and deeply.

you can do this when you are ready...think about how you think about it (kudos to chief), and start a plan.

peace!