Appreciation, and praying to be present tomorrow

[Mina]

:new:I stumbled upon this site tonight, and have found it very helpful to read through the threads and comments. Thank you all for your humility, honesty and inspiring support for each other.

Last night, I drank two bottles of wine, one red, one white. I did the same the night before, and the night before that. Different from what many describe here, drinking wine does not put me to sleep. Yes, it progressively lowers my level of consciousness but it kind of energizes me like a coffee. And I'd been using it to fuel me through quite a demanding and stressful project that several people were waiting for. It's involved me sitting alone in front of a computer screen day and night. Anyway, I finished the project last night -- and I'm alarmed by how much I've been drinking.

I'm learning from your site that "AF" is alcohol free, so that's what I am for the past 24 hours. I am seeing many of the effects others have described from drinking wine: some weight gain, terrible fatigue in the morning, redness and tired skin. It's a hard way to live!

I'll let you know how my AF goal proceeds tomorrow, one day at a time. Thank you.

[Blue Sky]

Appreciation, and praying to be present tomorrow

Hi Mina and Welcome:welcome:

You sound exhausted. Hope you can wind down over the Easter weekend now that your project is finished.

Read posts on this site, you are not alone. Lots of good advice especially under toolbox in the Alchol Monthly Abstinance Forum. It helped me to write down all the negatives alcohol was causing in my life. A month on it's amazing how much better I feel in health, wealth and happiness! I've lost 7 lbs in weight too without even trying!

Good Luck.

[Yogamomma]

Appreciation, and praying to be present tomorrow

You've arrived Mina! Am glad your stressful project is over with and, maybe, use this as a transition for your heavy or ALL drinking to be over and done with as well. Perhaps consider it as a "turning of the page" to a clearer, more present new era. There's lots of help here and we look forward to seeing you here a lot!

[MissMerlot]

Appreciation, and praying to be present tomorrow

Welcome Mina...

I'm glad you stumbled upon this site...I am still thankful that i did.
Wine was my drink of choice aswell and in a week i got through copious amounts of the stuff.I loved it,and i guess the love affair isn't over for me just yet.
I am trying to drink only one night a week...and only one bottle.

Today i am af 7days....which is a big deal as i never got beyond 4 anytime i tried before.

It has been really tough i must add as for 5yrs i've been used to a glass at my right hand but to be able to jump on hear and rattle out your feelings,fears and anxieties really helped lower my stress levels (which at times were through the roof)

Hope To Hear From You Soon...
Good Luck on day 1
:welcome:
annie
x

[MissMerlot]

Appreciation, and praying to be present tomorrow

sorry...day 2

[Mina]

Appreciation, and praying to be present tomorrow

Thank you, from Day 2

Thank you, all, for your welcome messages and support. I did not sleep well last night, and am exhausted right now. I was going to go to the gym but there's no way. If I get a bit more rest maybe I can go later.

Just to be clear, the level of consumption I described has been building for years. In the early part of this decade, 3-4 glasses a night, 3-4 nights a week. During a traumatic divorce in the middle part of the decade, I was alarmed one night after I drank 1.5 bottles of wine at home alone. I started going to an AA meeting almost every night but I found little power or utility in those exercises. I still drank. I also went through some intensive therapy for 3-4 years, and tried various touch-healing and trance therapies (but they get really expensive really fast

And here I am The trance that has retained a hold over my behavior is the 'wine-trance.'

I do feel that I passed a milestone here this week, and that this is a turning point to a new life. My plan is to slow down the amount of work and responsibility and worry I upload/take on. And allow more space to observe my own thoughts, meditate, work through my internal energies rather than outsource their numbing to wine.

Most people around me don't know what's going on with me in this way because I drank fairly fine wine, which ameliorate outright hang-over symptoms (fewer chemicals, etc.); I drank alone at home; I already drink a lot of water (almost a gallon a day); and I work out regularly. But that was interrupted a few months ago when I ended up on crutches and physio for damaging my leg on a flight of stairs. Was I drunk? Yes!!

No one else knows that . . .:thanks:

[decastille]

Appreciation, and praying to be present tomorrow

:welcome:Welcome Mina!!