Hi. New here wanting to stop self medicating with alcohol

[Swan]

Hello :new:, but I'm familiar (and in love with) v-bulletin. I'm very happy to find a support group on line in a format with which I am comfortable.

I guess I may as well just share my little story here, now.

I've drank alcohol in a healthy/normal pattern since I started up until sometime last year. That's when I went from 2 750ml bottles of wine a week to 4. I knew I was loosing control of my drinking when I'd say I'd only have 4 glasses and would end up having 6 or 8.

I've been depressed since I can remember, but I never went on an Rx for it. After highschool I self medicated with marijuana with no ill effects & I never abused it (seriously, a tiny ammout would last me months). But after having children I didn't want to risk using an illegal substance, even in moderation. So I used alcohol on the weekends to unwind and not feel so overwhelmed. The only problem is that my family has a history of alcohol abuse and addiction and it's not nearly as easy for me to moderately use alcohol as it was for me to moderately use MJ.

So, here I am. I recently decided to not ignore my depression anymore. I just got home from my first doctor's appointment with a script for Zoloft. I was honest with the doctor about my use of AL, which was scary on a bunch of levels. I'm hoping this will address my anxiety, depression, irritability, sleeplessness, and sensory processing issues so that I can more easily quit using alcohol.

Speaking of, I don't really have a plan about quitting. I don't know if I need to stop forever (like my mom) or if I can moderately use as some point in the future (like my dad). I did drink alcohol this past weekend, but I will consider today being day 1 of AF (what does that stand for exactly anyway?). I want the medication to work it's magic for a while before trying alcohol again. I'm a little scared. I'm sure I can get through the week, but Friday and the weekend will be a test. Like I said I don't know if I really *need* to quit all together so that adds to my temptation to allow myself to drink moderately on the weekend.

If you read all this thanks

[tlrgs]

Hi. New here wanting to stop self medicating with alcohol

HOWS ABOUT JUST QUIT FOR A MONTH AND SEE WHERE YOU ARE AND HOW YOU FEEL .. GIVE IT A TRY .. STAY STRONG AND THINK POSITIVE

[last10years]

Hi. New here wanting to stop self medicating with alcohol

:welcome:Hi Swan - Glad you posted! You are very correct in going AF with getting on any new kind of meds. You will find lots of support here and people with just about every story and background. Good luck! If I had any advice, I would recommend you going AF (alcohol free) for some time with the new meds and to determine your overall AL problem and/or situation.

[startingover]

Hi. New here wanting to stop self medicating with alcohol

Hi Swan, Welcome!
Firstly well done on taking the first steps to treating your depression and dependence. Like Mr T says, start by giving up alcohol for 30 days and see how you feel. In any event, drinking on anti depressants will negate their effectiveness, and also, alcohol is a depressant in itself. It certainly wont be helping your symptoms.
Check out the toolbox thread in the monthly abstinence section and also if you can, read the My Way Out book. Both those things will help you put a plan together and give you tools to help you quit.
Read and post often, the support here is terrific. For me that made all the difference.
Good luck!

[Marshy]

Hi. New here wanting to stop self medicating with alcohol

Hello Swan & welcome!

Good for you for seeing your doctor and taking control of this.

There's loads of info here to read up on, and an abstinence section and moderation section which might give you some ideas about what could work for you.

AF = alcohol-free.

Wot's v-bulletin? :H

:welcome:

[Swan]

Hi. New here wanting to stop self medicating with alcohol

Thanks for the warm welcome

I think you guys are right, 30 days sans ethanol is a good idea. I need to know how this medicine is going to work. I've also been making some diet changes slowly and it's a good time to go AF for that too.
Alright, I'm off to update my plan in the drink tracker. . .


:thanks: again

[Swan]

Hi. New here wanting to stop self medicating with alcohol

Being New here I don't want to start a new thread just for this.

It's been harder than I thought. The zoloft has helped tremendously, however I still fell into my usual pattern this weekend. Friday, Saturday, Sunday--6 drinks each day. Actually that is less than before so I guess that's something. Friday and Saturday were both 3 & 3 meaning I had three shortly afternoon and 3 again in the evening so I wasn't too far gone either time so that's something too.

Anyway. I guess I wasn't really on board with the AF for me idea before, but now. . . I think I HAVE to. I don't think I can mod. . .at least now.

Also, the AL did negate some of the benefits of my antidepressants.



I need a new pattern. I need advice. I hate hate hate admitting I have a problem.

[rubywillow]

Hi. New here wanting to stop self medicating with alcohol

Don't worry about starting a new thread, hon, sometimes it's the best way to get attention. I noticed there are several people on chat right now, and that's also a good way to info when you're new, AND meet people. Read a lot, post a lot, and STAY HERE. The only way to fail is by quitting (trying, that is!). Welcome!

[Rags]

Hi. New here wanting to stop self medicating with alcohol

Hi Swan, and welcome to MWO
Hey, you're doing well so soon! Patterns and habits are able to be broken and replaced with new patterns, so hang in there. You also have a head start inasmuch as you've gone to your doctor for help so give yourself another pat on the back.
Did your doctor not tell you that alcohol often heightens the effect of some drugs? That's why the Zoloft appears to be less effective...... but without the nasties in alcohol, the drug will overall be able to perform better.
What with medication, slight diet changes and a positive attitude, you'll swamp it!!

[Winefree]

Hi. New here wanting to stop self medicating with alcohol

Swan, it takes about 6 wks for the zoloft to truly kick in, so you need to give it time to work. Read and keep posting. Take it ODAT(one day at a time)

[Lavande]

Hi. New here wanting to stop self medicating with alcohol

Hi Swan,

Welcome! This is the place to be.........
I have to agree with the others - give it 30 days then decide how you're going to handle things from then on. I started out trying to moderate and soon realized it wasn't good enough. I will be 30 days AF later this week and have decided to continue abstaining, quite likely forever. My attachment to wine was way too strong, I don't ever want to let that get started again. It's just not worth it to me.

Be sure to use the CD's too. They really help to reinforce all the new things you are learning, I love them.

Best wishes on your journey, check in often.
Lavande

[Swan]

Hi. New here wanting to stop self medicating with alcohol

Thanks guys
I am going to try to keep a positive attitude. I should be proud of what I'm doing so far & I guess insta-success is a little unrealistic.
Here's to a new day one

[masepal]

Hi. New here wanting to stop self medicating with alcohol

Wow...my story exactly. Just haven't gone AF. bet the meds would work better.

[polaryzed]

Hi. New here wanting to stop self medicating with alcohol

Have U thought about . . .

Hi Swan and hi Masepal :welcome:

Great that you found MWO forum. The people here will help you in ways you could never have imagined.

It wasn't until I found this website that I even admitted to myself there could be a problem. Then reading various ppl's threads and posts OMGosh! Amazing, Inspiring and a Very Compassionate group of People here at MWO.

Keep reading, threading, posting and if you think it will help Journalling.

Sometimes when you think you want that drink, you'll find being here will change your mind. Works for me anyway!

God Bless . . .

[Swan]

Hi. New here wanting to stop self medicating with alcohol

polaryzed;596749 wrote:

Sometimes when you think you want that drink, you'll find being here will change your mind. Works for me anyway!

I think this will work for me too. It's like an on-demand support group. Even if it's not busy with New Posts I find my self in the what I loathe about AL & what I love about being AF threads with more than enough to read and remind me.

One day at a time. That's it, right? I can do this.