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    Do need help?

    Hi everybody, :new:

    This is my first thread so here goes.

    I am from Australia, I am 42 years old and have 3 teenage children. I drank slightly when I was pregnant with all three children. I was always glad when I finished breast feeding because I could start drinking mainly wine again.

    As time has gone on I have gone from no drinking Monday-Thursday then starting on Friday night with 4 good size glasses of wine. On Saturday I might have 2 glasses of wine with lunch then at dinner time I will share 2 bottles of wine between 2 people. Other times I will drink during the week, maybe 2 or 3 glasses of wine a night. I seem to be a binge drinker.

    I am fit and attend the gym at 6am Monday-Friday but I do struggle with this if I have had a big weekend (too much alcohol). I still manage to maintain my weight ok, however I never get the results I want at the gym probably because of the alcohol.

    The things I have noticed during the last year is that my health has deteriorated. I am often fatigued, unhappy, weak muscles at the gym (unable to lift much weight), my short term memory is not like it used to be as well.

    Does anyone else have these symptoms? Is it a sign of drinking too much?

    Thanks for listening. :thanks:

    #2
    Do need help?

    Hi Millie!

    :welcome: Hope you're OK, I know it takes a lot of courage to take that first deep breath and post your 1st thread so :goodjob:.

    I, too, am 42. I've got 2 younger children (9 and 7) - I WISH I was as motivated as you re the gym but I know that my weight can fluctuate by 1/2 a stone purely because of the wine.

    My history was previously Monday-Thursday no drinking and then really binge drinking (didn't realise that term had reached Oz!) Friday, Saturday and Sunday but am now questioning myself which is I think what you're doing and you've got to say that if that's what you're doing then perhaps it's time to change ..... Also my 9 year old is getting very, very, AL aware (it's on the curriculum here in the UK) and we have some quite hard hitting ads here - I suppose it's a back-handed way at getting to the Mums just like you/me.

    Anyhow, I found this site at the beginning of the year. To cut a long story short, I've found TOPA and am now on my 2nd lot ... and for the moment sticking with it. For me, it's TOTALLY reduced cravings. Really not bothered about wine during the week and then I don't have that race with hubby with glass for glass at the weekend - result for me, anyway.

    What are your plans, Millie? Even if you just log on, read - I'm sure that'll help - but you've taken a big step by your first post so well done and GOOD LUCK! :lxx

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      #3
      Do need help?

      Hi Millie08. I too am new. Day 3 for me and logging onto this site is the best thing I have done in a long long time. I am 43 and have 2 children, age 13 and 11. I suppose I am a binge drinker in that I seem to live by the maxim that an open bottle is an empty bottle and I would always have a other bottles to follow that. Wine usually. Beer too. The weekends are my downfall as I often feel I "deserve" that relaxing drink. The fallout is horrendous though, the price so high. Days of barely functioning, not being really there for my children, there in body (just about!) but not in mind. Just flat. It takes days for the clouds to clear. The self loathing, depression and guilt are suffocating. Like photogirl, my children are also becoming very AL aware as it's also discussed in the schools in Ireland, the land of saints, scholars and a serious drink culture! I want something different for them. I want to lead by example. I know I have only been here 3 days, but the support I have received and the caring encouragement can only be described as incredible. As soon as I wake up in the morning I turn on my computer to read the threads and gain strength from them.. The weekend is fast approaching and although I have been drink free for 3 days, I have to really be put to the test. That terrrifies me. I know, however, that by staying here and by posting and reading, I really have a chance. I am determined to beat this and so can you. It's a journey but a very worthwhile one....Best of luck to you....Juno

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        #4
        Do need help?

        millie08;592621 wrote: Hi everybody, :new:

        This is my first thread so here goes.

        I am from Australia, I am 42 years old and have 3 teenage children. I drank slightly when I was pregnant with all three children. I was always glad when I finished breast feeding because I could start drinking mainly wine again.

        As time has gone on I have gone from no drinking Monday-Thursday then starting on Friday night with 4 good size glasses of wine. On Saturday I might have 2 glasses of wine with lunch then at dinner time I will share 2 bottles of wine between 2 people. Other times I will drink during the week, maybe 2 or 3 glasses of wine a night. I seem to be a binge drinker.

        I am fit and attend the gym at 6am Monday-Friday but I do struggle with this if I have had a big weekend (too much alcohol). I still manage to maintain my weight ok, however I never get the results I want at the gym probably because of the alcohol.

        The things I have noticed during the last year is that my health has deteriorated. I am often fatigued, unhappy, weak muscles at the gym (unable to lift much weight), my short term memory is not like it used to be as well.

        Does anyone else have these symptoms? Is it a sign of drinking too much?

        Thanks for listening. :thanks:
        Hi Millie08. I too am new. Day 3 for me and logging onto this site is the best thing I have done in a long long time. I am 43 and have 2 children, age 13 and 11. I suppose I am a binge drinker in that I seem to live by the maxim that an open bottle is an empty bottle and I would always have a other bottles to follow that. Wine usually. Beer too. The weekends are my downfall as I often feel I "deserve" that relaxing drink. The fallout is horrendous though, the price so high. Days of barely functioning, not being really there for my children, there in body (just about!) but not in mind. Just flat. It takes days for the clouds to clear. The self loathing, depression and guilt are suffocating. Like photogirl, my children are also becoming very AL aware as it's also discussed in the schools in Ireland, the land of saints, scholars and a serious drink culture! I want something different for them. I want to lead by example. I know I have only been here 3 days, but the support I have received and the caring encouragement can only be described as incredible. As soon as I wake up in the morning I turn on my computer to read the threads and gain strength from them.. The weekend is fast approaching and although I have been drink free for 3 days, I have to really be put to the test. That terrrifies me. I know, however, that by staying here and by posting and reading, I really have a chance. I am determined to beat this and so can you. It's a journey but a very worthwhile one....Best of luck to you....Juno

        Comment


          #5
          Do need help?

          Hi Millie and welcome.

          You will find lots of support here, plenty of people in the same boat, some of them further along in recovering their lives. You will also find plenty of aussies and lots of gym/fit people too. Lots of parents, my eldest is almost 6.

          I have been AF for periods in the past and my fitness levels have increased. Juno, like you, I will be put to the test this weekend but I am determined to be AF. One of the things that kept me AF in the past was always keeping close to MWO, when I strayed I fell. Stay close, read lots and don't be afraid to ask for help.

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            #6
            Do need help?

            Welcome Millie - Glad to read your post! Lots of support here and many genuinely interested people that can relate to just about anything. I'm AF day 6 and feeling great...the best advice I would have is to spend a lot of time here if you decide you want to be AF....LT

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              #7
              Do need help?

              Welcome Millie and Juno
              Best wishes as you begin your journey.
              "Decide-Which Voice in Your Head you Can Keep Alive" (Shinedown)

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                #8
                Do need help?

                Wow thanks photogirl and juno it's good to know that there are other people the same age with kids out there that are also struggling with the same problems.

                My kids are 2 boys 19 & 17 and a girl 14 so I already have one drinking and another who is experimenting, however my daughter at 14 thank goodness has not touched the stuff.

                Luckily the boys don't drink much at all only at party occassions and anyway the 17 year old is under age and I am not happy about that. However he has told me that he has been drinking at parties.

                Anyway my journey will start on Sunday and I say that because we have a wedding and a dinner party to go to and I want to start afresh on Sunday. Is that wrong??????

                I am getting married for the second time on 23rd May and my aim will be that I am not drinking a sip until the night of my honeymoon - then of course I will have some champagne. But I really want to do it this time. My fiance and my kids say "yeh right mum as if you will do that" but this time I want to show them that I will.

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                  #9
                  Do need help?

                  Hi Millie & Juno *wave*
                  I'm in a similar boat - I hit the gym & lift very decent weights....but I don't get the results I want & I'm sure it's the al. You won't perform at your peak after a big weekend - fatigued muscles, sweating a lot more etc & there are so many empty calories in al...wine really is fattening & dehydrating...If you wanna perform better at the gym and get your results cut the al down or out.
                  Stick around, I look forward to getting to know you.
                  xo

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                    #10
                    Do need help?

                    :hello2::colorwelcome::wave::groupluv:
                    :beach: life does change as long as you are willing to change yourself ..
                    best thing about the future it comes one day at a time..

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                      #11
                      Do need help?

                      Thanks angelcakes it is also good to hear that there are some gym junkies (as my kids call me) out there. I struggle at the gym so much some weeks depending on the amount of alcohol, it really zaps your muscles.

                      The support here is incredible it is so helpful for everyone. I was just reading the posts and there is heaps for today. Is that normal?

                      I feel this site will definately benefit me on my journey that I am about to begin. I am on school holidays here in Oz at the moment (I work at a school) so this is a good time to start. As I said I will start Sunday morning and we will see how things go.

                      You know isn't it crazy that you can go to work everyday and on some of those you are severely hungover and none of your work colleagues even know that you feel like dog do do. You seem to get really good at hidding the secret of what goes on behind closed doors.

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                        #12
                        Do need help?

                        Hi Millie!

                        Congratulations on your forthcoming wedding! All I'd say in the meantime is don't look for excuses ... it's always about to be the weekend or there's a holiday coming up or whatever - if you can moderate now then you'll be on your way to kicking the habit that has slowly crept up to all of us and bitten us on the ar*e when we weren't looking!!!!!

                        I'm 2 days this week after a short break over the easter hols but if you look at my other replies, TOPA definitely works for me reducing the cravings BIG STYLE!!!!

                        Glad you're enjoying your time here and getting the feel of it all - bit strange at first isn't it when you're like "I don't do forums" mg type of things!!!! But it's lovely to know that there are people out there - just like you going through the same thing and no matter how much you love your nearest and dearest :l:h:l:h, something like this is difficult to share and put into words.

                        Anyhow, got to rush as got to get my girls down to London for a couple of days over the easter break to show them some sights ..... avoiding pubs and wine bars of course!!!!!

                        Take care, enjoy the rest of your easter hols and continue with a plan till next weekend :lxxxx

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                          #13
                          Do need help?

                          Good morning all! (It is in Ireland!) :thanks: Thanks for the welcome Anglecakes and Seacailin. Many congrats on your upcoming wedding Millie and the very best of luck for the future. It's not a bad thing to wait till Sunday. Whenever you are really ready. It's in your mind and you are gearing up! Enjoy the dinner party and do not feel bad. You know you're about to embark on a great journey after it! I know all about not getting results from exercise and I know it is because of the empty calories in alcohol. The two definitely do not go together! I'm on day 4 now (feels longer!) and feel so much better though I am still dreading the weekend. Think I might just hibernate! Bring the kids for a day out in Dublin maybe. I will keep in contact with this site though as I know it gives me strength. Good luck Millie and :goodjob: keep in touch! Juno

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                            #14
                            Do need help?

                            Hi Millie, Juno, Photogirl

                            Reading your patterns is like going over mine - Wine is a problem and it's so easy for me to get into the habit of bingeing and not being a teenager, I'm 42, even in the UK that's not good!!

                            Started 30 days AF on Monday this week and I know the test will be the weekend. I've noticed my memory isn't what it was and it does improve when I cut down/out the AL also I like to run and some weeks my muscles don't seem to have any strength in them and that also happens to follow some bottle downing..... Too much of a coincidence???

                            As they say, keep reading, learning, posting etc and we'll all help each other through.

                            Bx

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                              #15
                              Do need help?

                              Thanks Photogirl, Juno & Mad Mommy,

                              Yes weekends will be the hardest habit to break. I can manage Monday to Thursday ok but come Friday night through to Sunday I lose it.

                              Good luck to all for the weekend.

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