Newbie here. First time actually. Hope I do this right.

[Nearly Sisterless]

I'm loosing my sister, once my best friend, to alcohol. She is very, very sick. She's an extreme case and is in end stage unfortunately. Still I drink allot and feel horrible or sick I guess is the right word with myself for not at the very least stop drinking on a daily basis.

I have questions though. Can I quit drinking so heavily even if my husband doesn't? And can I be successful without the expensive products?

They would be reasonable if I weren't missing income.

[DeeBee]

Newbie here. First time actually. Hope I do this right.

YES, you can quit!!!
YES, you can be successfull!!

I am so very sorry to hear about your sister, it must be heartbreaking for you to witness.

Wishing you a warm welcome -- we are here to support you and help you get a plan together:-)

[startingover]

Newbie here. First time actually. Hope I do this right.

Hi Nearly, welcome to you.
Deebs is right, you can do this, regardless of what goes on around you. Its might not be easy but it IS doable..
I am so sorry about your sister. Maybe this is very good time for you to stop.
Let us help you in any way we can.

[choppersmom]

Newbie here. First time actually. Hope I do this right.

Hi Nearly and :welcome: ! I am so sad to hear about your sister. What a terrible thing to have to witness. I agree with DeeBee and Starts...you can do this and be successful! Keep posting, keep reading, and reach out whenever you need it.

[Nearly Sisterless]

Newbie here. First time actually. Hope I do this right.

Thanks for responding.

I have to break away shortly and Mommy duties but I needed to join before I changed my mind yet again. I'm home alone all day I should have gotten on the computer much sooner today.

The situation with the sister is a disaster. You never want to be end-stage I assure you. She is in horrible condition both physically and mentally. Her family is torn apart and we all await the day that she either just doesn't wake up from her drunk or worse wraps her car around a tree or God forbid someonelse!

Okay I done my first step. I'm offically a member. Today is day one, this one is easy, the husband wants an alcohol free night. He does those without much trouble, I on the other hand will probably not feel so well tonight and not sleep a wink either. How do you fix the sleepliness?

[polaryzed]

Newbie here. First time actually. Hope I do this right.

Welcome NS . . .

I too am truly sorry to hear about your sister. Life can be so hard at times.

As DBee and Starts said YOU CAN DO IT. Many others here have and so can you.

Part of the key, in my opinion is to keep busy, extremely busy. I know for me when I found this forum I was sliding downward and didn't really care. All I knew was I was in control . . . or NOT . . .

Please keep coming back and let the good people here quide you through this trying and emotional time. I think you will find the inspiration you need to help you through these tough times.

God Bless and Keep You Well . . . :l

[Boo boo]

Newbie here. First time actually. Hope I do this right.

You can do it...

I can't imagine what it must be like for you NS. What a tragic circumstance. Our thoughts are with you. There is no doubt whatsoever you can make it. I think the products are fantastic, but there is no greater factor than your own determination - you can do it NS. If hubby wants an alcohol-free night it suggests that a part of him also wants to beat this thing. You could be of great support to each other through this difficult time.

On the sleeplessness front, I can totally relate. I wish I had a silver bullet answer but unfortunately I don't. I've been plagued with insomnia since I was a toddler; trying to sleep while listening to my alcoholic parents yelling and beating each other up. I have read others posts though that say that after they have been alcohol-free (AF) for a week or two, find that their sleeping patterns return to normal. That may be the case for you(?)

Take good care :l

Boo

[Nearly Sisterless]

Newbie here. First time actually. Hope I do this right.

Thanks for the tip that the sleeping patterns return.

I'm sorry to hear about your alcoholic upbringing. I don't know when it all gets out of control like that. My sister is finally getting a divorce after fighting over her drinking for years! She has two children 16 and 13. Can't even imagine being in their shoes!

My hubby and I get along great never fight. We are like best drinking buddies. That's what sucks. He doesn't believe either of us have a problem. He wants a AF night because he doesn't feel well. The weekend was long and full of early drinking something we don't do except weekends.

Fact of the matter is I look at what has become of my sister and it scares the hell out of me.

[drink2much]

Newbie here. First time actually. Hope I do this right.

[pre]How do you fix the sleepliness?
[/pre]

I use valium/diazepam or nitrazepam. Easily ordered over the internet - if you need a link, pm me.

[Lavande]

Newbie here. First time actually. Hope I do this right.

Hi Nearly,

Welcome to MWO! This is the right place for you and a good time for you to get started on your journey. Sadly, maybe your sister's deteriorating condition is your wake up call. Learn from her tragedy and start taking care of yourself now, before its too late. Maybe you can let her know that you are doing this, it may give her some peace knowing you will do better.

Stay close to us, we will all be here to help you through.
My thought and feelings will be with you.

Lavande

[mica]

Newbie here. First time actually. Hope I do this right.

Oh, my. I am here to say that your found the best place to get through this. I am so sorry about your sister, but congratulations on not wanting to go that route. You CAN do this.

In regards to your question about sleeping, I can empathize. I also have a horrible time sleeping. In my experience, finding out how hard it was to get off of Ambien, once I became addicted to it, I have found that a very small dose (less than 1mg, you'll probably have to cut the pills) under the tongue really helps. I usually wake up about half way through my night and take another small chip of it. Most of the time it helps, but sleeping is a bitch, isn't it?

[savon19]

Newbie here. First time actually. Hope I do this right.

NS - Welcome!

I'm so very sorry about your sister.

I don't take any of the supp's (money's an issue for me, too). However, I've seen that it's all about One Day at a Time AND WANTING to quit! I know, easier said than done - but you Can do it. And you will start to feel better and even sleep better. It takes some patience, but I'm seeing that it's worth it.

And speaking of money - how is it that we can justify the money spent on booze?? I did... somehow. Crazy.

I think it would be very hard for me if I were living with someone who drinks. Mainly because that would mean it's in the house! And if it's here... I drink it!

Do you think your husband would agree to at least not drink in the house? Maybe he can go to pub or someplace if he really wants to drink...? That's a tough issue.

Maybe others w/husbands who drink will chime in about how they handle that.

[Boo boo]

Newbie here. First time actually. Hope I do this right.

Two great strengths....

Hi again NS

The fact that you and your hubby get along great is a HUGE big plus. That, along with your own wish to be free of the hold AL has on you guys, can serve as a really strong foundation for building a happy and healthy alcohol-free life together.

There's no doubt that if your hubby is in denial it does make things a bit tougher - at first. But if he observes you kick the habit and sees the changes in you - how you feel physically and how you feel about yourself - you never know what impact that might have on him. It could be wonderful That said, don't be afraid that if you stop drinking and he doesn't, that somehow you will 'lose' something good you have together. All the good stuff between you - and it sounds like there's a lot of it - is not about the alcohol. It's about truly loving each other, and your giving up drinking shouldn't jeopardize that, just make you stronger.

You're on the right track NS - go with it, stay with us, keep reading and posting. You can do it :l

Boo

[Boo boo]

Newbie here. First time actually. Hope I do this right.

This person needs support right now....

C'mon you fullas.........

[ezzmae]

Newbie here. First time actually. Hope I do this right.

Hi NS.

I have also married my best drinking buddy. I have gone AF in the past and he has cut down on this drinking just because I am not there to get drunk with him. He doesn't believe that either of us has a problem. But he does seem to enjoy life more when I am AF and he is modding, plus I am available now to drive home from the pub.

I let him drink around me and in the past it has always been something that I wouldn't drink so it lessens the temptation. Right now I am strong enough to allow a carton of beer in the house without wanting to drink it. He is only drinking 1 per night so this carton is going to hang around a long time. It took me a long time to get to this stage though.

Wishing you good luck.