Hi to the old timers. Just rechecking in as a newbie to this new board.
I've been on Topamax - very successfully for several months. I'm 37 next month. Found this program earlier this year. I was a very heavy drinker. Every day. A LOT every day (even used to sneak at work). I functioned so well that people had no clue that I had consumed as much alcohol as I did every day. Anyway, Topamax made it possible for me to drink at first a LOT less ever day. Then I could go whole days and consecutive days without drinks - remarkable and wonderful for me! Thank you MWO. I titrated up to 300mg/day but found it a little too heavy a dose for me. I found Topa was the most helpful to me at 200mg/day (100am and 100pm). Now I can do just fine at 100mg/day (50am and 50pm). It wasn?t always easy mind you. I went off of it in early July when I went on vacation and started to tell myself that I planned on drinking this day or that day - even deciding I would drink too much - and never quite went back to taking my topo regular for a while again. I found myself sliding back into drinking a little more and a little harder than I should until I really tied one on the last weekend in July. I stayed out all night and drank so much I did a few things I really regretted. Well. I am back on the Topamax - very regularly. And as before - it's extremely helpful (coupled with my own resolve of course). I have actually not had ANY alcohol in the last 19 days! time to decide I can do the 30 day abs period I'm taking the All-in-One supplement and have been for a while now. I love the way it makes my hair and nails grow as an added benny. I haven?t' really kept to any other part of the program except the All-in-One powder and the Topa. But so far I'm doing so great. I just wanted to check in.
I wish everyone starting out all the best and want to offer encouragement that it does work and feels great. I am in such a better place and it isn?t scary - or boring not drinking. I have fun. I enjoy life (EVEN MORE!). I?m just now seeing how nice it can be on this other side. I?m sorry we have such a struggle just to be here though. Hugs and kudos to all of us doing this!
I also had one other purpose for posting (and I?ll post this Q on the medication section and in a separate Antabuse post as well). Because of my slip the end of July, I wanted to make extra sure that I didn?t have another drink for a while - I can worry about how to moderate later - I?m actually fine with not drinking right now (did I say that?). Moderation will always be an option at a later date. But then I know I will be making a level headed decision that I want to moderate and not just my addiction telling me to choose moderation because I can?t see myself living without another sip of my precious alcohol! So even though at this moment I?m fine, what about some Friday driving home and the desire hits to pull into the liquor store? So I ordered some Antabuse on-line and they came in the mail a few days ago. I took one the first night and one the second night. The problem came when my blood pressure shot up a little and I tried to double check the pills I took. They didn?t look like any of the pictures of Antabuse that I?ve found on the websites - in either the 250mg or 500mg tablet. My pills are white, round, appx 1.25cm diameter, scored, DUMEX is stamped above the score and 110L below the score. I stopped taking them of course but would like to know if they can be identified. I understand the hazards of ordering abroad - I should have checked this all out before taking any! They came in bottles that had Antabuse labeling but not any outside packaging (i.e. boxes). And there was no cotton or silicon moisture packets that sometimes come in pill bottles. Don?t know if this means anything or not. I?m really racking my brain to remember if the safety seal was tightly in tact or not, but can?t be sure. This all sounds pretty bad I know. My only defense is that I have to believe that it was, because had it not been, I hope that I would have noticed something like that! Anyhow, Anyone able to identify this pill correctly or any thoughts from anyone on Antabuse out there?