New to this forum - support needed

[DoneDrinkin]

Hello,

I am new to this forum and I would like to introduce myself. I'm Steve and I'm 35 years old. Over the past 15 years, my drinking has increased from reasonably normal levels (3-6 beers a week) to 2+ bottles of wine a day. In that time, I've lost my marriage, a fiancee I loved dearly, 3 dream jobs, all my friends. I've alienated my family, endangered my health and lost the respect of my children.

I don't know why it has taken me this long to realize it, but Saturday I had somewhat of a "eureka" moment, when I suddenly realized that alcohol has been the cause of much of the unhappiness in my adult life. I know what you're thinking.... DUH, EINSTEIN.

I know now, but it wasn't clear to me. I was functioning perfectly well. Physically in good shape, didn't think there was anything wrong with drinking that much. All my problems were caused by something or somebody else.

What caused my moment of clarity? I was watching a TV show for the first time - "intervention" (after well over half a bottle of vodka), and the truth became painfully clear to me that I was already a long way down the path to self-destruction. I saw pieces of myself in all the alcoholics on the show, and for the first time, I saw the sadness and pain I have caused my own family in the eyes of the intervening loved ones.

So, here begins my journey. My last drink was Friday May 15. I hope it will be last for good.

I feel great. I have mental clarity for the first time in many years. I am starting to feel alive again.

Thank you in advance for your support. I know I will need it.

--Steve

[choppersmom]

New to this forum - support needed

Hi Steve and welcome :welcome: I want to say congrats on almost a week AF...that is absolutely fantastic! You have to a wonderful place that is full of support and encouragement.

I have seen the Intervention program and it sometimes make me cringe because I will see myself in all the alcoholics too. It is very sobering (pun intended :H) They have given me an ah-ha moment a time or two

I am sorry for the losses you have endured due to drinking. You are now on the right path so that the losses don't have to occur again. It won't be easy, but it will be worth it.

Stay close, read, post and ask questions. You will get all the support you need. I look forward to getting to know you.

[startingover]

New to this forum - support needed

Welcome Steve! Isnt that eureka moment priceless?
You are doing great with your AF time so far, at least you will be over the initial withdrawal.
Oh, and it gets better and better.
Have a look at the Toolbox thread in the Monthly Abstinence forum, that will give you some help if and when things get tough.
Are you taking any med or supps? They might be worth considering for the long term too.
Well done for getting started. Stay close to the boards and soak up the inspiration from all the lovely folk here.

[~iirene~]

New to this forum - support needed

Hi Steve. The first step is to openly talk about your drinking problem.
HOW TO SCREEN FOR HEAVY DRINKING
For me it took many instances of embarrassment until i found out drink was causing all my misfortunes.
you will learn here how to recover.

best of health to you on your journey. sounds like you have a great start.

[DoneDrinkin]

New to this forum - support needed

Thank you both for your responses. I am looking forward to getting to know you all too.

I am not on any meds... I didn't know there were meds for this! I don't feel sick, or an overwhelming urge to drink. Should I still look into meds?

What I do feel is that I have more time on my hands than I ever remember having. I've started running again, and working out in the evening when I would typically begin drinking. This is great because I get home late and I am ready to have dinner and go to bed.

Thank you again. I will look at the Toolbox thread.

--Steve

[startingover]

New to this forum - support needed

No, you dont NEED meds, just sometimes its as well to be prepared for all eventualities. I take supps, Kudzu and Lglutamine for cravings. I have been sober almost a year and find that this keeps me on an even keel.
Good stuff on the running. I have started again too. You will soon fill your extra hours with good satisfying activities just make sure you give yourself time to adjust to the new you. Some people say they get bored with too much time.

[DoneDrinkin]

New to this forum - support needed

iirene,

That link made my chuckle. How many times in the past year have I had 5 or more drinks in a day? No need to count. 365. 366 on a leap year.

Sad, but true.

--Steve

~iirene~;618532 wrote: Hi Steve. The first step is to openly talk about your drinking problem.
HOW TO SCREEN FOR HEAVY DRINKING
For me it took many instances of embarrassment until i found out drink was causing all my misfortunes.
you will learn here how to recover.

best of health to you on your journey. sounds like you have a great start.

[LilBit]

New to this forum - support needed

Hi Steve! Welcome and congrats on your 5-day AF. If you made it this far, you can really make it anywhere you want to go. One of the things that strikes me, after being on these boards for a few weeks now is how many of us ended up with wine as our *best friends.* I once even told myself, "It's not like it's serious AL. It's only wine." Ha! I'm glad that you have a new, true perspective on what's been causing your problems and how to fix it. Good luck, and we'll all be there with you on your journey.

:welcome:

LilBit

[Bella]

New to this forum - support needed

Steve....you have my support. You have lost alot...but looking on the positive side...u have gained a "eureka" moment...i know what u mean when u say, a moment of clarity. Thank God for that TV programe eh!!!??? But i dont think that made any difference, u already knew there was something not quite right maybe. Anyway, good on ya for reaching out...u will find like minded people here... best of luck on yr journey. B XXX

[DoneDrinkin]

New to this forum - support needed

Thank you lilbit!

Really.. it did feel like a friend, every evening. That is a very accurate description.

I assume AF == "alcohol free"? If so, thank you. I have had a few cravings, but the feeling of being sober is so much better than being buzzed, drunk or hungover, that I'm resisting the temptation.

--Steve

LilBit;618541 wrote: Hi Steve! Welcome and congrats on your 5-day AF. If you made it this far, you can really make it anywhere you want to go. One of the things that strikes me, after being on these boards for a few weeks now is how many of us ended up with wine as our *best friends.* I once even told myself, "It's not like it's serious AL. It's only wine." Ha! I'm glad that you have a new, true perspective on what's been causing your problems and how to fix it. Good luck, and we'll all be there with you on your journey.

:welcome:

LilBit

[~iirene~]

New to this forum - support needed

Steve, this is a helper along the way. Sobriety Calculator
sobriety is a whole new way of living. this forum is the best around to help you.
you can't fail unless you allow it.

[Lavande]

New to this forum - support needed

Hi Steve,

Welcome to you from another former wino!
I am 8 weeks AF (alcohol free), don't miss it or the perpetual hangover............sure you don't either.
Congrats on your start, you are doing great! Remember, this will be an ongoing process for all of us. I know, in my case, I can neverdrink again. There really is just too much to lose. I am working on repairing some of the relationships I've messed up over the years - it's going to take a lot of time.

Hang in there with us, we can be a very supportive group. I am grateful for all of the help I have received.

All the best,
Lavande

[LilBit]

New to this forum - support needed

Yes Steve, AF=Alcohol Free and how sweet it is! It could also be CF (Crazy Free), HF (Hangover Free), FBF (Floppy Belly Free), ZBBF (Zero Bank Balance Free), PEBF (Puffy-Eyed B_tch Free), and a number of other ones!

Just my two cents on the meds and supps... I am not a big fan of meds, but the supplements really, really make a difference, especially L-Glutamine. I take 3000mg three times daily and it virtually eliminates any cravings. There's a lot of information in MWO and on these boards about the supps and meds, so please research it and do what's right for you.

As for the vino feeling like a "friend," I was out of town last weekend and walked into a grocery store for some sunscreen. When I reached the aisle with all the wines and liquors, I realized that I felt a sense of relief, as if an internal sense of panic had subsided. Funny, huh? Some friend, though. As one fish said to another fish while swimming through the tentacles of a poisonous coral, "With friends like these, who needs anemones?" :H

[startafresh]

New to this forum - support needed

Stick around here Steve, you can do it.
I'm 7 days AF and proud.

starta
:welcome::new:

[DoneDrinkin]

New to this forum - support needed

Thank you everyone. I am quite overwhelmed by all your supportive posts. It feels great to be sharing this journey with you all, and share in yours.

So I just got back from a 7 mile run, and I'm a little high on endorphins right now! I'd better go grab a shower before I stink this place up..

--Steve