How did this happen?

[42cat]

How did this happen?

Thank you, Popeye!

[jessie]

How did this happen?

Hi Cat,
You are unto something very important when you describe our problematic drinking. Obsession.obsessed, obsessive!!! I sure that if there was a pill to stop obsessive thoughts then the alcoholic population will be halved.
What do you others think?

[DoneDrinkin]

How did this happen?

jessie,

Absolutely! It's all part of the "disease".

--Steve

[ladybirdheart]

How did this happen?

My heart goes out to you Cat. I planned to taper off over three weeks but found the process rather agitating after a few days so I stopped with the help of the CDs and supplements (l theanine really helped me as well as the usual ones). Please don?t do what I did which was not let anybody know what I was going through. For some reason I shut down and did not post here during acute withdrawal . I have yet to learn to honestly reach out when I need it; I tend to make a little joke or do nothing. I so admire your honesty, courage, and ability to ask for what you need. I think because of your ability to be both introspective and express what you are going through, you will more likely keep perspective and not be overwhelmed by any given moment more than you can bear in light of the big picture. It will be uncomfortable but it can be done. When I had a brief relapse after twenty days, alcohol had a completely different affect than when I was drinking every day. It was not what I was ?looking for? and it was not such a physical problem to stop. I am a one day at a time person now and like thinking about things that way. There are many ways out; there are many here for you as you find yours.

[Luvwins]

How did this happen?

Little by little

"Obviously my (our) changes in thinking and behaviour didn't happen overnight, but occurred little by little over the years. I don't have any traumatic event to blame. I drink because I'm bored and lonely - and I don't even have an excuse for that .. I'm married, have great kids, a lovely house, etc. My drinking makes no sense to me.... yet I'm obsessed with it."

42Cat: Your description describes my situation to a "T". I am another mom who drinks alone. Since joining here a year ago things are better but not good. I guess one thing I can be grateful for is the progression down the path to more and more has stopped. I never made it to a fifth a day and never around the clock but I can see now I sure could have.
Your post is great - thanks!!

[paula]

How did this happen?

My story is just the same, I'm completely obsessed. I am seeing a counsellor, I'm taking campral. Nothing seems to work. I'm scared I'm killing myself. At the moment I'm in a big deep hole, that I can't get out of.

[hart]

How did this happen?

(((Paula))))

Hon I'm struggling to. But one thing that does disturb me, to be honest, is talk of drinking and driving. PLEASE budget a taxi into your expenses. If you EVER hurt someone due to drinking and driving it would be real hard to live with the guilt. PLEASE< PLEASE take a tax or bus!

[paula]

How did this happen?

Thanks hart, I have never driven while drinking. I always get a bus.

[42cat]

How did this happen?

I have. It was wrong. I've never admitted it to anyone except on these boards. It is a huge, ugly, shameful secret ... If my family (a husband and two teen girls, my mom, my dad, my bro - a doctor, my husband's family) ever knew - I can only imagine how they'd react ... I'd be thoroughly shamed - and deservedly so.... And if I'd ever been stopped by the police.. Yikes, the embarrassment, shame... (but again, deservedly so).

Why have I driven after drinking? The main reasons were completely stupid ones: The liquor store is up the road and I needed more. I could and should have walked. Driving was unnecessary. Very wrong.

It is my plan to never, ever do it again, ever.

Btw, thank you again to everyone ... thank you all so much for your replies. It means a lot to me and has really helped in my struggles lately.

Today has been a good one so far. A few "sips", but tapered nicely. Hoping for better tomorrow, and then better again, and then God willing (and myself willing) AF for the weekend. Sounds like an odd time to go AF, but I find I actually drink more throughout the week ... more time by myself during the week to drink, I guess. Silly but true.

Thanks again, all.