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    New here, need help

    Hi all,

    I just stumbled onto this site while researching alcohol addiction and withdrawal. I guess I'm what you'd call a 'maintenance' drinker. I rarely get drunk, but maintain a steady buzz all day, every day. I drink prolly close to a 5th of vodka a day, and sometimes some shots of tequila.

    My health is rapidly deteriorating from the alcohol. I have multiple health issues, which I'm sure are worsened, if not caused, by the alcohol. I know I'm very malnourished, as I have NO appetite at all, and can barely eat much of anything. I don't sleep well at all either. It has become a pattern of drinking just to feel normal, passing out, waking up in the wee hours after only about 4 hours sleep, then sitting up for another couple of hours and having a few more drinks, then go back to sleep for a few hours. Then I get up, TRY not to drink as long as I can, only to have horrible withdrawal symptoms, so I start to drink again to relieve them.

    I can't continue this pattern any longer. It is literally killing me, and I know if I don't stop I will certainly die! :no:

    I have attempted many times unsuccessfully to taper down, but it just doesn't work. I'm desperate to get off this stuff, but don't really know how, and it scares me to death. It's ruining my life and destroying my health.

    I think the biggest hurdle for me is the withdrawal phase. I think once I get over that hump, I should be able to abstain with the help of MWO and possibly even AA if needed, though that's not my preference.

    I've come to realize that I can't just quit cold turkey. I need medical intervention ans the withdrawals seem to be severe after only a couple of hours after my last drink. I'm going to look into checking into a detox program to get through the withdrawal phase. I've ordered the book for MWO and will read that and give it a try as it sounds very helpfull.

    Who else here has been at this point and was able to turn their life around. Any tips or advice you can give me?

    Thanks!

    :flush:

    #2
    New here, need help

    Welcome, White Rabbit! You are not alone, and you are in a great place. There's SO much support here, and no one will judge you. Have you read MWO yet? I think the book would really be helpful for someone in your position. It talks about the different options for meds and supplements. 'Never tried the meds myself (sensitive system) but the supps made ALL the difference in reducing and eliminating the cravings. After drinking for 20 years, I am on day 31 AF. You can do this!!! Post all you want. Talk to us. Fight this thing with everything you can! Like you said, it's your life at stake.

    You have a very beautiful avatar, BTW.

    Hang in there!

    LilBit
    "If you fell down yesterday, get up today." -- H.G. Wells

    Comment


      #3
      New here, need help

      Hi WhiteRabbit ... Welcome!

      I'm in a similar spot as you - I drink a quart (5th) of rum or vodka a day, all day, morning to night, never get drunk, just need to "get by" ... sip by sip by sip ... at work and at home. I am recently noticing different withdrawal-type symptoms that are creeping in, which I never got before, when I go without for any length of time (which is always a small length of time), and I'm getting scared.

      This week, I'm trying to taper down (again) ... I'm only on Day 2 of tapering right now. Yesterday was pretty difficult. As I mentioned in another thread, I was coping "5 minutes at a time" at some points, but did my best to get another extra "5 minutes, etc." under my belt before taking a swig or two to stave off the shakes and anxiety, and chasing it each time with a big glass of water or two........ Today, is somewhat better ... I've had about half of what I'd normally have by this time, have been drinking water like a mad woman, and am feeling pretty OK.

      I've never gone to a detox facility, or been through full, scary withdrawal. If I could do it easily, I'd go to a facility - and I may end up having to. I'm just hoping this taper works.

      I think it's important to listen to your body. From what I read, withdrawal can be quite dangerous.

      Please know you're not alone in your struggles. There are so many of us! Read through the different threads, google lots of stuff, learn as much as you can, post here a lot, try some different things - supps, vitamins, etc., drink tons of water, green tea, warm lemon in water, etc.... you probably heard most of that before, and so have I .... but I've just written it all down (again) today to keep it in mind.

      **hugs** .... Nice to meet you!
      AF for two years. Slight relapse. Working on it at the moment.

      Comment


        #4
        New here, need help

        Hi White Rabbit. Glad you are here. That does sound scary. You will find a ton of support here. I am too new to give you a ton of advise, just wanted to say hi and wish this new journey of your well. Keep us updated!
        Give a man a beer, he'll waste an hour. Teach a man to brew, he'll waste a lifetime.

        Comment


          #5
          New here, need help

          Welcome WhiteRabbit . . .

          :welcome: White Rabbit, great that you found this forum, somehow I think you are meant to be here to help others . . . as well as yourself.

          Hi 42Cat, Colbe, LilBit and others to come ~

          White Rabbit, your patterns sound very much like my Dad's . . . which is helping me to understand what he must have gone through . . . I have yet to learn the why of it all. Hence one of the many reasons I am here and learning more each day.

          Are you taking any vitamins at present? Your comment "No Appetitie" is a huge concern. Do you drink any water, juices (with vitamins), eat fruits at all, etc.? Sometime ago, I heard Vitamin B is excellent for healing the liver. The good people here will tell you more about supps. and vitamins.

          The fact that you are here and Willing to Help Yourself is an enormous 1st step. Like the others said "You are Not Alone, this is a Great Place to Start".

          I look forward to learning more about you . . . :l I too, love your Avatar is he/she your pet or companion as I prefer to put it?

          Comment


            #6
            New here, need help

            Welcome White Rabbit.
            Stick around - keep reading and posting... we're here to support you.
            "The person who says it cannot be done should not interrupt the person doing it"

            Comment


              #7
              New here, need help

              Thank you all so much for your support and encouragement.

              LilBit, I haven't read the book yet. I just ordered it yesterday, but am looking forward to reading it. It sounds like it's been very helpful to many of you.

              42cat, thanks for the welcome It's kinda weird, but when you're a 'maintenance' drinker, nobody really knows what you're going through on the outside. It's not as obvious to the rest of the world, which I think can make it even harder at times. But yes, after doing some research on withdrawals, I realized I'm gonna need some medical help to get of this stuff. I'm going to the county detox this weekend for an evaluation and see where it goes from there. In the meantime, all I can do is keep maintaining the booze to feel normal. :nutso:

              colbe, thanks for your support! Yes, I am actually getting quite scared. I've never been this bad before, and I'm rapidly going down hill, so it's time to put the brakes on!

              polaryzed, yes, hopefully one day I'll be able to help someone else having the same struggles with this poison as me. I have TONS of supplements. The problem is, I can't take them on an empty stomach as it makes me very nauseous, but I have a hard time getting much food down. I do take a sublingual, liquid B-Complex though. But the lack of appetite is really what drove me to try to get off this stuff. I don't think I'm even eating enough to support my basal metabolic needs. I'm down to 113 pounds. :helpme:

              I have multiple health issues, and I don't know why it didn't occur to me sooner, but it is ALL from malnutrition. I looked up the symptoms of malnutrition, and I have almost all of them. And the malnutrition comes from drinking alcohol, which kills my appetite and irritates my digestive tract. I'm scared to death to even think about what shape my liver must be in!

              DeeBee, thanks for the welcome and support!

              This seems like a really great place to be. Very supportive and caring, and we're all in the same boat. Glad I found this place!

              Oh, and yes, my avatar is a pic of my beloved companion, Baxter.

              Comment


                #8
                New here, need help

                Baxter needs you too...how are you doing today, any better?
                Give a man a beer, he'll waste an hour. Teach a man to brew, he'll waste a lifetime.

                Comment


                  #9
                  New here, need help

                  Hi Colby. I'm ok at the moment. Same as usual though... drank myself to sleep, was up by 3 am unable to get back to sleep, so got up and had a couple of drinks then went back to sleep around 6 am, and just got up about an hour ago. So far I don't feel too bad. Waiting for the withdrawals to kick in :/ I've started taking some glutamine along with my B-Complex, so hopefully that'll help a little. I have a docs appointment later this afternoon, so I'm trying to hold off with the drinking as long as I can.

                  Comment


                    #10
                    New here, need help

                    That is great that you are taking the steps to take care of yourself. I hope you are ok and that you can get on a road to recovery very soon! I think you are almost there! :goodjob:
                    Your dog is beautiful!

                    Comment


                      #11
                      New here, need help

                      Whiterabbit, im impressed that you are going to your county detox. ive never been a mainance drinking..just a get drunk drinker. Anyway, good luck and keep talking.

                      Comment


                        #12
                        New here, need help

                        White Rabbit, you have my heart felt concern - let us know how it went at the doctor...
                        I'm with you in this struggle.
                        make the least of the worst, and the most of the best - everyday.

                        Comment


                          #13
                          New here, need help

                          Good to see the follow-up . . .

                          :goodjob: on the follow-up White Rabbit . . .

                          Hopefully the L-Glu and Vit -B will help to start you on your way to a healthy recovery. It is so Great to see you are there for yourself, we will help you as much as possible.

                          Please let us know how the doc. appointment goes.

                          Oh yes and there are some amazing people from various time zones that will be more than happy to read and thread with you in the wee hours of the morning when you need encouragement and inspiration at those times as well.

                          Be well our new found friend . . . :l

                          ps. you can get the book from your library, it took only 2 days for me to get the book and several to read it . . . lol (slow reader) Great Read!

                          Comment


                            #14
                            New here, need help

                            Hi white rabbit. I am new here also. I am a get drunk as fast as possible so I can pass out and not feel anyting kind of person. Although our styles are different, we are very much the same. I am on day 11 and this site has helped me so much. I am not the AA type, so this is so perfect. The first part is realizing it and wanting to do something about it. Slowly but surely you will get there. I hope all goes well at the doctor.

                            Comment


                              #15
                              New here, need help

                              Thank you all once again. What a great, supportive place this is! Glad I found it!

                              Well, I was trying desperately to hold off having a drink until at least 2 pm. Almost made it. By 1:30 the withdrawals were starting to get bad (shakes, anxiety etc), so I'm having a drink to try to settle it a bit before going to the docs.

                              Btw, the doc I'm going to today is a gyn. I've missed 4 cycles in a row. Previously I was diagnosed with endometrial hyperplasia (abnormal thickening of the uterine walls). He put me on progesterone, which I took for 2 months, then my cycle just quit. Yet again, I'm starting to think it is alcohol/malnutrition related. The doc seems to think I may be going into early menopause (I'm 45), so he took some blood work last week to check my hormone levels. Today I go in to find out what's up. I really don't want to go on any hormone replacement therapy, as my body is under enough stress already.

                              I guess it never occurred to me before that my health problems were due to alcoholic malnutrition, but now that seems to make the most sense to me. I haven't discussed with my gyn the alcohol problem or my lack of appetite, so it's not likely he would think of that either without me mentioning it to him. Guess I should just be honest with him and let him know eh?

                              I guess when I go into detox they'll address the malnutrition and lack of appetite as well. At least I hope so! It's getting me very worried, as I can barely get any food down at all anymore. I'm barely able to get down a few crackers, or a little fruit. I'm really looking forward to getting off this poison, getting my health back, and having a normal, healthy appetite!

                              Thanks once again for being so supportive and caring. It really does help to know there are others out there struggling with this beast too, and that they care. You are a great bunch of people!

                              :thanks:

                              Comment

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