Starting out again

[Cheeks100]

Been away for a while.

I need to do something desperately. Class myself as a high functioning alcoholic - hold down job family (2 girls -13 and 9) household etc but slowly killing myself drinking far too much wine each and every evening.

I think its destressing me to drink it in the evening (and it does at the time) but I just end up feeling absolutely exhausted with no energy and hangovers all the time. I cant stop at one or two I just keep drinking until I pass out. Hubby also drinks until he passes out so we are a right pair.

Could do with a "buddy" who is in a similar situation to help get through this.

Cheeks

[tiptronic_ct]

Starting out again

Welcome back, Cheeks

I guess by now you know this is a great resource, and I know that I wouldn't have been able to taper my drinking to a fraction of my normal intake without the support I got here.

Stay close, do lots of reading again, and post.

Good luck!

Tip

[Popeye]

Starting out again

Hi Cheeks,

It's easy to get into the way of drinking every night but much harder to change as you know.
Using alcohol as a way of relaxing and winding down in the evenings is OK but drinking until you black out isn't. It can be very difficult to get away from the habit of pouring yourself a glass. I know that when I was drinking getting the first one poured down my neck brought a huge sense of relief, but then I was an addict getting my fix. The other drinks just followed each other until there was none left, or I was out of it.
I find it almost impossible to moderate. Two or three drinks just seems to annoy me and a waste of time; a prelude to the main event, so I decided to stop altogether. This meant changing attitudes and using all the tools and help at my disposal. For years I had been conditioning myself to believe that drinking this way was alright even though I knew that it wasn't so I set about re-conditioning the way I think about myself. Obsessing about drinking, or not drinking for that matter was one of the first things I had to deal with. I took a holistic approach and learned a lot of new ways of thinking about the problem and learning a lot about myself in the process. Alcohol had dug it's way deeply into my psyche, so I had to dig as deep to root it out.
Good luck to you on your journey, and try to have some fun along the way.

[cacky]

Starting out again

Cheeks, im like you. when i drink i drink until i pass out. im trying to go AF but did slip up saturday night. ive separated from my husband and i only drink when i dont have my kids. i need to learn as Popeye says below to "recondition" myself. iim ok AF when i have my kids because i have to be. if i can give you a piece of advice....your kids know what you are doing. mine are 10 and they are very aware of it.

I can be your buddy if you want.

[Lavande]

Starting out again

Hi Cheeks,
Welcome back! This is a good place to be as you already know.
I'm with everything Pops said - we have to recondition our minds, change our thinking about drinking in order to be successful.
You have two wonderful motivators - your girls! They do know what's going on regardless of how hard you may try to hide it. Think about how great it would be for them to know they have a sober Mom.
It's not too late!
Read the MWO book again, make a good plan for yourself and just do it! You won't be sorry

Wishing you the best!

[brightlite]

Starting out again

Hi Cheeks,

Yup...can't just have two glasses of wine. I'm right there with you.

Popeye your words hit home. Happy you are winning the battle.

[Cheeks100]

Starting out again

Thanks everybody - you are so kind.

Managed to walk to bed last night before passing out on settee - so already helped by coming on here.

I'm going to try for AF tonight. Havent managed it for weeks, months year maybe - cant even remember.

Fingers crossed.

Cheeks