new to this forum

[andaz]

Hello just going to introduce myself i am a binge drinker that lived in the Uk but moved out to Turkey a few years ago. Thought it would have been easier to stay sober but i was wrong. Its worse i have an shop over the road that sells me drink even though he has been told not to. Its a holiday resort so everyone is on the drink. And as soon as have been off for a while a get the compulsion to drink. I forget the depth of dispare i put everyone including myself threw. My husband works away so it is so easy to start as i am not policed. His mate he works with his wife was an alcoholic and was found dead from the drink. She was found in a pool of blood and vomit on the floor. He is so terified that will happen to me. I have had my last drink yesterday and was in a right state. Was on it for 5 days. I even got the shop guy to brink me a bottle of vodka over and hide it in the garden. I just hope and pray this is the very last time. I hope i can get some strengh from this forum i never need to drink again. I suffered from panic attacks when i was younger and that fear is always there incase they come back. The only thing that stopped them was a big drink. :new: I am not very good with computers so not sure what i am doing

[vlad]

new to this forum

Welcome Andaz! Keep reading and posting - a good place to start is to download the My Way Out book. There are also some good threads about too such as the Toolbox thread in Monthly Abstainance.

[Tabbers (a.k.a. KTAB)]

new to this forum

Hello Andaz and welcome. Well done on admiting to your self that there is a problem, you have taken the first step important step. You say your husband isnt around to police you, you have to realise that the only person who can make you stop this cycle of distruction is you, yourself. I would agree about downloadling the MWO book and reading it. It will help you to formulate a plan of action. Everyone here has battled or is battling this also, you are not alone and will get plenty of non judgemental support and advise. May I suggest you check out the Newbies nest in Just starting out and post and read.
Keep safe
KTAB

[gyco]

new to this forum

hi andaz,your thread cot me,notice some replied,this a great site,for being another alternative to AA,or whatever else is out there,as long as you have an enabler,its very hard to stop,the booze will never go away,and most of all,we find a way to get it,ive been honestly doing this for 10 years,drank for 40 years,im 56,your taking great strides by just posting here,congrats,this sobriety thing beleive me is not easy,as you stated the only other alternative is eventually death,there are some that can mod,i happen to be one of those,but in the end its the same old thing,you end up getting back to where you were,when you stopped,then the cycle starts all over again,it is a long journey,here theres no such a thing as failure,the will to try to help ones self,is all you need to do welcom again gyco