Alcohol is the beast

[golfpro]

I am not really sure why I am posting. I guess it is tough to talk to people about certain things and this forum allows you to say things in an anonymous way with other people that can relate.

Last week I started drinking pretty heavily by myself. Then an old friend and his girlfriend showed up and we really started drinking. He then brought out a bag of weed and I haven't smoked that stuff since college, and back then I only did it a few times (it is much stronger these days). Well long story short, four days later after a couple bottles of Captain Morgan, smoking, and not eating I ended up in the hospital.

Although in pretty bad shape I was able to check myself in half way sober. I spent two days in the hospital connected to an IV line and wires connected all over my chest so I could be monitored. They performed every test possible from an EKG to a catscan, must have taken my blood 6 or 8 times over two days, took my vital signs every four hours, and even had a person sit in my room all night to just monitor me.

After all the tests, blood work, etc. they said I need help with my drinking, but I couldn't be any healthier for a 38 year old male. I could go out and run 10 miles or ride my bike for 50 miles without any problem right now. I feel guilty for going to the hospital because there are people out there that really need help (I did need help when I went to the hospital). I didn't drink for four days after getting out of the hospital, but tonight I have had a few drinks and scared I am going to start this cycle over again.

My mom was trying to get me to go to the Betty Ford Clinic the past couple of days, but I have resisted. My parents are too old to keep putting up my crap, but I don't know how to quit.

Well that's all I have for now and hopefully this will help someone before things go too far for them.

[catch22]

Alcohol is the beast

Hi golfpro,
Deep down i know why you are posting,
Sound like you do need help with your drinking, just because you can run 10miles or ride your bike for 50miles doesn't mean to say you have a problem.......I hope your own post will help you as well (as others) and i also hope things do not go to far for you a well.... to quit drinking... it takes one day at a time!
Thanks for you posts.....

[Guitarista]

Alcohol is the beast

Hi Golf pro.
Great to see you here.
I was also a heavy drinker, who could run 10 miles etc...any time. This doesn't mean that our body wont eventually shut down through alcohol abuse, and/or alcohol poisoning. You were in hospital because of alcohol abuse. Or, if you like, self abuse. This is not you being healthy, friend. This is you, on your way out. Why not re-assess where you are now, where you want to be, and what you're going to do about it. Read lot's here, and keep asking questions. You must get yourself a plan. Can you see a doctor where you are, to help you put a plan together? It sounds like you are in a dangerous place. Chin up, and do the work.
Best wishes............ G.

[Elpis]

Alcohol is the beast

Hi Golfpro,

Welcome! I am glad that you posted. Do you have a problem with alcohol (big AL)? Only you can answer that question. I can tell you a little bit of my story. I am 10 years older than you. I can’t tell you exactly when my drinking got out of control (assuming I ever had control). I can say that when I was 38 I was drinking pretty steadily (not every day… and only in the evenings) and in pretty good shape, meaning that my height and weight were proportional and I could pass a military physical fitness test. Ten years later – about two weeks ago to be specific – and untold liters of wine, liquor, and whatever else that contained big AL later, I was about as low as I could go (see the thread “Dying” that I started a couple of weeks ago). My body was shot, I was sweating just sitting in my office chair, I was winded walking up a modest incline. The organs in my abdomen ached almost constantly. As the title of my thread suggested, I was dying. I HAD to quit. Now the damage is done and some of the damage, but not all, will heal in time IF I continue to abstain. I can’t have back my children’s birthdays. I can’t have back the broken promises. I can’t have back my wife’s disappointments. The kids still approach me cautiously, not sure which daddy is “in” at the moment. All I can do is move forward.

I wished I could turn the clock back ten years… but I can’t.

E-

[brightlite]

Alcohol is the beast

Golfpro,

AL is the Beast, the devil, satan and his only intent is to take you down! Read as much as you can on these boards you will begin to realize that you are on a road to destruction unless you do something about it.

Elpis, I'm your age and as Cher says "If I could turn back Time"!!! Keep on reading and posting....it's good to see you are in a little better place.

[1967]

Alcohol is the beast

heya golfpro! i am going to be honest, for better or worse. if i were you i would enroll myself at Betty Ford.
what the hell... why not? quitting alcohol on your own is so difficult! it could take you months if not years to really kick it. i've been trying seriously now for 2 years... making promises to myself i want my life back and ... well.... today is day 10... i made it 4 months last Fall and then it started again. it's hard! I have to say I've gotten a lot done in the past 10 days! And I'm a lot less anxious... I am taking an anti-anxiety & anti-depressant. I went to my doctor and said "look, I can't do this alone... please help me?" his reply was 'of course ms." a true relief.
Betty Ford will give you skills to help deal with this problem. what is wrong with learning some tried and true coping skills? if I lived in the US, and I could swing it, I would definitely put myself in a facility like Betty Ford. No one has to know about. Nobody. Tell your parents you'll go on the condition that they discuss it with no one as this is your private life.
i wish you the best... at 38 you have a lot ahead and it will be a lot more fun if you can remember what you've been up to!

[betty boop]

Alcohol is the beast

golfpro to MWO .........

Firstly please don't feel guilty for checking into a hospital, you DID need it .........

I think that you have done the right thing by coming here, you now have a 24/7 support system consisting of real people that can empathise and not just sympathise ...........

I would seriously consider your parents offer of the Betty Ford clinic it will give you a really good start to kicking the beast ...........

I, like 1967 went to my doctor for help and within days was following a structured detox programme, and I am now on day 15 AF. Not a lot by some standards but a hell of a lot for someone who has not spent a day of the last 12 years without at least one bottle of wine and more often 2-3 bottles. Like Elpis I have disappointed my family, upset my daughter and spoiled many many special occasions.

Jump on board here and kick the beast ..........

Love & Hugs, BB xx Attached files [img]/converted_files/1004771=3465-attachment.jpg[/img]

[JackieClaire]

Alcohol is the beast

Hi Golfpro and welcome,
Like BB and 1967 I have also been on a home de-tox.
In fact I've done quite a few de-toxes that my doc has put a revolving door on her surgery.
I don't know why it's clicked this time,but I just can't go back to the way I was.
Dare I say that I have never been happier for many a long time.
Wishing you all the luck in the world.
It's now your choice.
Hugs.
Jackie xxx

AF since 7/7/2009

[Lavande]

Alcohol is the beast

Hi Golfpro,

Welcome, glad you posted!
Obviously you have a strong desire to quit drinking, that's the first step. Have you read the MWO book yet? You can download it right here from the website. After you read the book you ned to make a good plan for yourself, everyone's a little different. Things that need to be considered are the possible use of medications, the supplements, the Hypnotherapy CDs - which are very good, etc.
Do a lot of reading through the different threads, see what others are doing.
Most of all, don't give up, just keep trying.

Wishing you the best!

[Dreamweaver]

Alcohol is the beast

Elpis;695134 wrote: Hi Golfpro,

Welcome! I am glad that you posted. Do you have a problem with alcohol (big AL)? Only you can answer that question. I can tell you a little bit of my story. I am 10 years older than you. I can?t tell you exactly when my drinking got out of control (assuming I ever had control). I can say that when I was 38 I was drinking pretty steadily (not every day? and only in the evenings) and in pretty good shape, meaning that my height and weight were proportional and I could pass a military physical fitness test. Ten years later ? about two weeks ago to be specific ? and untold liters of wine, liquor, and whatever else that contained big AL later, I was about as low as I could go (see the thread ?Dying? that I started a couple of weeks ago). My body was shot, I was sweating just sitting in my office chair, I was winded walking up a modest incline. The organs in my abdomen ached almost constantly. As the title of my thread suggested, I was dying. I HAD to quit. Now the damage is done and some of the damage, but not all, will heal in time IF I continue to abstain. I can?t have back my children?s birthdays. I can?t have back the broken promises. I can?t have back my wife?s disappointments. The kids still approach me cautiously, not sure which daddy is ?in? at the moment. All I can do is move forward.

I wished I could turn the clock back ten years? but I can?t.

E-

I would give anything.......not to see the disappointment in my child's eyes. Everything hurts from the armpits down!