Scary. Told my husband.....

[lushy]

Ironically after my second glass of wine last night I finally got up the courage to tell my husband about this program. I felt like I was always having to hide something from him and it felt better to get it off my chest. He was beyond supportive, telling me how happy and proud he is that I figured it out on my own but that he had not noticed I had a problem!!! Goes to show what a controlled drunk I can be. I explained that the root cause for me is out of control anxiety which is just being made worse by the drinking but that I have had quite a few AF days and know I can do it. Guess I am really commited now that I let the cat out of the bag, no???

[mojomuppet]

Scary. Told my husband.....

horray for you! here kitty kitty kitty.im glad you hubby is so understanding and im sure that is a great load off your mind.have a great day.

[Guest]

Scary. Told my husband.....

yeah! good on you lush! you'll find it so much easier with some support-and someone else to hold you accountable,although like you, after I told mine, I did have periods of wishing i hadn't !-because i wanted to go striaght back to drinking, without anyone knowing about it! - still working on that! but drinking is such a disease of secrecy, so many of us , i think wind up living double lives-shine some light in there! you hang in there- this is a good place to be!

[gypsi]

Scary. Told my husband.....

Good for you lush! You're way braver than I am at this point; I don't know how to tell mine, since we both drink and I'm worried that I'll lose him (I know, stupid way to think). I know I gotta, just don't know how yet...

[lushy]

Scary. Told my husband.....

No, not a stupid way to think. I am living with a non drinker who has never had life traumas of any sort and does not understand the concept of anxiety and depression and so I finally felt like I needed him to understand what was going on with me. It would be VERY difficult to have a spouse who drank because I could never give it up. I wish you the best. My husband said he was supportive but I know he does not even begin to understand what hell we go through in our heads.....lucky him!!! Are you trying for abstinence? Do you really think your husband would leave if you chose not to drink? I am here if you ever want to e-mail.........

[Beaches]

Scary. Told my husband.....

Yeah Lush. I am so happy for you. I am not to that point yet and haven't had the courage to let go of the secret. I think it's because my husband is pretty much a non drinker as well and I don't want to deal with him saying anything if I do have a glass of wine. Maybe that's up to me though to explain moderation etc.

I don't know. Getting there..not yet though. After a tough few days I was AF yesterday and feel good again today.

[lushy]

Scary. Told my husband.....

I told my husband after I shared my problem that I NEVER wanted him throwing it back in my face or there would be a real problem. And he agreed. In fact last night I really wanted a glass of some GOOD red wine I had bought, not the usual crap I buy, and I was just goingt to have two. I asked him, since he was already up, if he would get me a glass. He looked at me kind of sideways and I said, "Oh maybe you misunderstood me last night. I am not trying to moderate how much I drink but want to moderate how often I have to pour my own wine and want you to start doing it for me all of the time." We got a good laugh out of it. But I guess it depends on your husband's personality if he would get on you once you have shared with him. I can say part of me wishes I still had kept it to myself because now I feel like I am on a diet and I told the whole neighborhood and now they are expecting to see huge changes right away. Oh well. Nothing I can do about it now. I see nothing wrong with keeping it to yourself.....

[Saint Jude]

Scary. Told my husband.....

Lush, it must feel better to have that out in the open with your Hubby. It's great that you can have a chuckle about it too!
I remember one time my Hubby was complaining about me drinking the last 2 beers in the fridge... and I said something about them being "left-overs"... so it was OK!! He quickly informed me there's no such thing as "left-over" beer! Huh... Whoda thunk! (Not w/ my "Evil Twin" around!!)

[I Like Brandy]

Scary. Told my husband.....

Lush;

I know the feeling, it was the same conversation I had with my hubby(who does not drink) 11/1/05. Then I joined MWO 12/05.

I'm cheering you on!:h
Brandy

[Sepnine]

Scary. Told my husband.....

Hi Brandy, newbie here. Noticed you joined MWO in Dec '05. Can I ask how you're doing? Are you moderating? Did you do the full program (supps, CDs, Rx, exercise), and if so, for how long? (Topa is generally used for 12+ weeks only from what I've read.)

[lushy]

Scary. Told my husband.....

Thanks Brandy. I think it really, really helps to have a spouse who does not give one rip about drinking so I can not keep in the house if that makes it easier!!

[gypsi]

Scary. Told my husband.....

lush wrote: ... It would be VERY difficult to have a spouse who drank because I could never give it up. I wish you the best. My husband said he was supportive but I know he does not even begin to understand what hell we go through in our heads.....lucky him!!! Are you trying for abstinence? Do you really think your husband would leave if you chose not to drink? I am here if you ever want to e-mail.........

:thankyou:
To be honest, I think I'm rapidly coming to the point where my attitude is such that should he choose to leave me, I would have to accept it and just move on. I don't think I'm trying for abstinence, at least not yet. Living in small-town Alaska, there's not too many choices when it comes to entertainment, and I really do like my karaoke. But it would be so awesome to be able to go out and only have one beer, maybe two all night. I'm still at the evaluating stage with this; have not yet talked myself into buying the supps and cd's, probably because I'm scared of the (imagined) rejection I'll face once I start down this path...

[Guest]

Scary. Told my husband.....

Hi Gypsi!
you're right, it will probably be" imagined" rejection- I think when we're thinking about quitting - we try to come up with as many things that could go wrong as possible!I don't think it's going to be as bad as you think! in fact, you'll probably be really surprised how helpful and supportive people are-don't think about it TOO long -dive in and see where it takes you!glad you're here and that you've found this resource - good luck !

[gypsi]

Scary. Told my husband.....

Actually, I did dive in yesterday. Before I could talk myself out of it, again, I grabbed my cc and ordered the supps and cds. Hope they get here soon - :crossed:

[gypsi]

Scary. Told my husband.....

Finally told the spouse. Actually, he nailed me on it, as he'd noticed that I hadn't been to the bar in a couple of days. I knew it was foolish to think he'd leave me, and as a matter of fact he's become so supportive that he told me this am that he would completely stop drinking if that's what I needed him to do.
What an awesome guy I have!