Scary. Told my husband.....

[Guest]

Scary. Told my husband.....

Hey! I am brand-new but found this site last night. However, I was already on Topomax (this is week 3) and now I have ordered the other supps and the book. I didn't spring for the cd's yet, and now I'm wondering if I should have.

Anywhoo, my hubby also is 99% abstinent. Exceptions would include perhaps some extra-special wedding, or similar. He HAS noticed my every night bottle of wine and it is taking it's toll. I was pretty sure I wanted to be abstinent prior to stumbling (literally!) on this site. Please tell of your successes. I am a 40-something mom of 3 and only drink in the evening. It doesn't "directly" interfere with my parenting but I'm aware that on some level, it must. I'm also fairly sure I just want to stop and experience life as an alcohol-free person, although a part of me grieves in advance of quitting, for all those dinners prepared with a bottle of wine at my side that I will miss.

Thank you for reading this!

Skempy

[Jody F]

Scary. Told my husband.....

Heartfelt Thanks!

Hi all! I just want to send :h because I just found you all early yesterday morning, read the
book, called my MD (who is also a dear friend for 25 years) and he Rx'd Topomax in the a.m.
I picked up the med by 1 p.m . yesterday - did not order supps or cd's - but have not had a
drink in almost 48 hours! And it feels so good! Thanks for all the support. :l I went to bed
reading and highlighting the book last night, and I'll do it again tonight. It's 7:30 p.m. here, so
the difficult time has passed, whew. And it wasn't even that bad. I took 50 mg this a.m, and
50 this evening of Topo. It's hard to believe just 3 days ago, I drank 4 bottles of wine! Thanks
again. Best wishes to everyone, too! Jody

lush wrote: Ironically after my second glass of wine last night I finally got up the courage to tell my husband about this program. I felt like I was always having to hide something from him and it felt better to get it off my chest. He was beyond supportive, telling me how happy and proud he is that I figured it out on my own but that he had not noticed I had a problem!!! Goes to show what a controlled drunk I can be. I explained that the root cause for me is out of control anxiety which is just being made worse by the drinking but that I have had quite a few AF days and know I can do it. Guess I am really commited now that I let the cat out of the bag, no???

[lushy]

Scary. Told my husband.....

First of all Gypsi I am so happy your husband had the opposite reaction your were expecting. So glad. Why is it that so many men can just "give it up" if they have to? I am envious of that. And skempy welcome. I, too, have a 99% non drinking hubby who only sees how much is in the recycling and about 1-2 times a year will ask if maybe I am drinking too much. I get defensive and then he lets it go. I know for me it is affecting my moods, my mornings, my energy, but cannot seem to stop overindulging. This site has been a God send in that I have made some really nice friends and I realize I am not alone. I hope you will find that as well. Welcome. Were you on the Topamax for something else or had you read the book? How is it working for you? I am not doing topa, just the supplements but they seem to help when I take them consistently. Keep us posted on how you are doing.........

[skempy]

Scary. Told my husband.....

Ah yes, the recycling! Well I only put a fraction of bottles THERE. Yeah, I get defensive w/my hub, too. Sorry for the delayed response - I kept forgetting to check back once I realized I had hijacked someone else's thread :blush: . Still learning to navigate the waters here. I started Topa on doc's advice as I have wanted to combat the urge to unwind with a bottle of wine every night for a very long time. I do not know how to handle stress. I also love a drink when I am in a great mood. As a matter of fact, If it's after 5 pm, there are very few times when I would refuse a cocktail! However, I (had) decided today would be different. Although I've been on Topa for 3 weeks (now just at 75), I haven't slowed down my imbibing one bit, maybe just started a little later is all. I have not received the supps or book yet. (Should I order the hypno CD's? When do you listen to them? Do they help?) I simply woke up this morning knowing that this was the day. BUT just got a call from older child's school about an academic issue that I thought was resolved. Hubby is furious and I am already bracing for an intensely stressful night. Can I do this? It still seems like the right thing, I just think the support I would have had from hub will now be superceded, know what I mean? Oh well. The only person I can control is myself!

Lush: Are you abs or moderating? How do you find the supps work for you? I hope my pkg comes asap!

TTFN! and :thanks:

[Changeling]

Scary. Told my husband.....

I am in absolutely the same boat as you.
My husband loves to party - loast year I stopped drinking for 7 months and I am sure he was nothing but relieved when I started again. I always felt like an outsider - he was glad I was able to drive him everywhere - but hated everything else about me sitting there sober all night.
Best regards

[lushy]

Scary. Told my husband.....

hi there. I have to admit I am not doing the program in its entirety. I do the supps, but not on a regular basis as much as I should. I find that they make me feel healthy and, whether it is a placebo effect or not, I think they help decrease the cravings. My desire to cut back (I am going mods) comes from so many years of disgust with myself and I am just ready to do some nights during the week AF. I don't like it but it is getting easier and becoming more of a habit every week knowing that it is just not an option; I have to go 2-4 nights without. A lot of us are like you in that any mood is cause for a drink; happy, sad, mad, etc. What I really have to learn to deal with is not going overboard on the weekends when I do drink because my tolerance is way down from not drinking every night. I have heard good things about the CDs; it is just not something I think I need at this time. BTW, one thing I just discovered is when I log into the website I click on "new posts" at the top of the page and it will show you anything new that has happened on a thread. Very cool, and saves a lot of time searching around here. Keep us posted on how you are doing.......

[gypsi]

Scary. Told my husband.....

I too, am not doing the program in its entirty. I'm doing the supps, but I haven't started the cd's yet. And I can't do the topa (glaucoma). After yesterday, though, I think I will start the cd's today. Really bad, stressful day that sent me to the bar after two days AF. It seems at this point that I am unable to get more than two days in a row, but on the good side, that's much more than I was getting before

Now I gotta figure out how to handle the stress w/out running for the bar every time I get stressed out -

[I Like Brandy]

Scary. Told my husband.....

Sepnine;

I apologize for not responding earlier. I just noticed the post. I've been with MWO since 12/05 and the majority of my support has come from the people here. I did complete abs for the month (I think) and then I make sure I don't drink more than a few times a month. Sept. I drank 5 different occasions and not drinking more than one beer each time. I also try not to drink when I'm angry. Currently I take Magnesium, Zinc, Niacin and Calcium everyday.

Welcome to the family:welcome:
:h Brandy

[michael Culligan]

Scary. Told my husband.....

sophieschoice wrote: yeah! good on you lush! you'll find it so much easier with some support-and someone else to hold you accountable,although like you, after I told mine, I did have periods of wishing i hadn't !-because i wanted to go striaght back to drinking, without anyone knowing about it! - still working on that! but drinking is such a disease of secrecy, so many of us , i think wind up living double lives-shine some light in there! you hang in there- this is a good place to be!

DONT PICK UP THE FIRST DRINK.THINGS WELL WORK OUT FOR YOU.GOD BLESS YOU.

[michael Culligan]

Scary. Told my husband.....

WHAT GOOD WELL COM OUT OF YOU DRINKING THINGS WONT GET BETTER IT GOSE DOWN HILL