First Day in Long Time

[Crusinthrulife]

Yesterday was my first time being Alcohol Free in such a long time I can't remember. I'm an evening drinker and usually have 3 glasses of wine an evening. Last night I almost went and got a bottle; even considered drinking a beer which I had in the house, but fought the urge by drinking lots of water and then took a sleeping pill and went to bed about 10:00 pm. I slept through most of the night and woke about 5:30 a.m.

I was a caretaker about a month ago for my dying mother-in-law. Since she died I have found out about my husbands financial infidelity (another $24,000) - so life goes on and I have decided I need to take care of me and stop drinking myself into being numb. I only married two years ago and it has been the roller coaster from hell; with one lie after another lie - things I should have known before we married. My fantasies of the "knight in shining armour" have diminished and I'm not sure there is any hope left for this marriage.

It's been very difficult to focus on taking care of me when there is so much else going on. I also moved, changed job and my baby went out on his own, all in the last year. So to not drink last night was a big goal for me; tonight I go for day 2.

[redhibiscus]

First Day in Long Time

I am on day 2 also. And in the last year my son moved across the country so our house is quiet. Financial infidelity I have experienced in the past with my husband, and I thought I would literally lose my mind. But for some reason at that time I did not drink, but I also couldn't eat and I lost 25 pounds. I remember being so scared about not paying the bills.

You are right, you need your wits about you as you have your work cut out for you. I hope you and your husband can work through the lies and make a go of your marriage. Having an empty nest is a mixed blessing and a huge adjustment. If you need to talk, I am here as I have made a committment to not drink in September.

[Gold]

First Day in Long Time

Well done on day 1 alcohol free cruisin. You've had a lot to deal with and it's good that you have decided to take care of you, only with a clear mind and focus can you make any decisions you need to make.

Best of luck to you.

[Lavande]

First Day in Long Time

Hi Crusin,

Congrats on your first day - that's the toughest! Just keep putting one foot in front of the other.
I agree with Gold, you need a clear mind and focus to make positive changes in your life.

Please join us on the 'Newbies Nest' thread. We would love to get to know you better & help where we can.

Here's to day 2

[Muddle]

First Day in Long Time

What a huge accomplishment, Cruisin! I had my Day 1 ten days ago and am just keeping at it each day. I keep trying to remember even when things are rough and I think I have a reason to drink, the AL doesn't fix anything. And whatever escape it may provide is so temporary. The financial part is hard, but I remember for me, it was the lies that cut me the worst. I'm so glad you are here.

[lifeisgood]

First Day in Long Time

I can totally identify with the "drinking myself into being numb" comment. That's pretty much how I feel. Good for you for stepping "away" and going to sleep.