I am on Day 5 and I'm not sure if it's a craving or just my demons playing tricks on me thinking I'm really ok, and I don't need to not drink, and that I can manage 5 days, so I don't have an issue.
I haven't had anything to drink since Saturday evening when I said goodbye to my oldest daughter going on vacation to France with my mother. She whispered in my ear, 'I don't want to remember you being drunk on my vacation.' It devistated me, and has since been my eye opener. She has emailed me since she's been gone and mentioned nothing of it, yet, today I replied, and told her I haven't had anything to drink since she left. Not sure if I wanted her to feel better or some acceptance......
I suppose I just need to get my feelings out there....pray that I don't hop in the car and get some beer. I have AL in the house, but as long as I never start with the beer (don't have any), I won't start in on the other stuff.
My husband is proud of me....my kids have been mentioning as of late how much I have been drinking which is less, but they seem to be mentioning it more....I want them not to remember their childhood of their mother being a drunk.....
My goal is to be able to moderate.....I am taking Nal and Bac.....the Bac is definately working. I haven't had 5 days AF since last year cold turkey and white nuckles!
Thank you for listening to me and being a sounding board.....
Christy
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