questions about quitting

[drunky]

Hi. I have been drinking 3-4 pints of beer almost every night for the past two years. Sometimes I switch it up and drink half a bottle of wine. Whenever I have committed to stop for any period of time I can't seem to get past day 3. The exception was last year when I was injured (not from drinking-from triathlon. I am one of those high functioning types). I was then able to abstain for seven days.
The biggest problem I have is insomnia. It hits me as soon as I stop drinking. When I do sleep I get horrible nightmares. I can tolerate this for a night or two but by the third night I convince myself that it is healthier to drink and sleep than to abstain and not sleep.
Does anyone have advice for about dealing with the insomnia and the three day hurdle? I am broke right now, I don't mess with prescription drugs and don't have health insurance to cover them. So cheap holistic remedies are preferred. I have tried valerian root but it doesn't seem to do much for me. I would really appreciate some advice. Thanks!

[Boss.man]

questions about quitting

Yes yes yes. I have long experience with using alcohol as a sleep aid, although I can only speak from my own experience and reading.

I drank for 25 years, in the end primarily to fall asleep. After all, after 5-6 stiff drinks, I would be asleep, right? I started stopping in August 2008, and finally got it sticking well in early 2009. At this point, I'm not AF. I still have alcohol in small amounts periodically. Fortunately, I haven't touched hard liquor since May and have come to a stable peace with going to bed "naturally" without my habit.

Sleep itself is a complex thing. It starts when your pineal gland secretes melatonin which it naturally does each evening based on circadian rhythm, day/night cycles. It continues through four stages, and with good sleep there is an established cycle through them.

Alcohol enhances and breaks the cycle in a number of ways. In some of my reading indicates that alcohol elevates serotonin, which is the sole ingredient needed by your tiny pineal gland to make natural melatonin. So it's easier to fall asleep with alcohol because you flooded your brain with serotonin so your pineal has plenty to work with. Unfortunately, alcohol withdrawal undoes the elevation, and you need to pee anyway, so alcohol sleep means just 3-4 hours of sleep, and the remainder of your night is disrupted. So the next day, you'll have alcohol withdrawal which causes a low mood, depression and anxiety, and you'll meet that by being over tired and frustrated.

The "addictive" part of alcohol is a chemical attraction with your opiate sensors, which are part of your primitive brain, Amygdala, also called your "Lizard brain". You can google all these terms for more information. Parts of the brain evolved at different times. This part of your brain evolved early, and as the name implies lizards and all higher animals have this part. The opiate sensors are SUPPOSED to trigger when you successfully work and achieve a goal. To some degree they trigger for bingo, gambling, playing solitaire on the PC, which is why these are enjoyable activities. They trigger for graduating school, attaining an award and being famous. As if by mistake, they trigger for some chemicals including chocolate, alcohol, and most addictive drugs hence the name opiate sensors.

There's two issues with your lizard brain. One is: LIZARDS DON'T SLEEP. Yep. Your Amygdala doesn't sleep. Since it operates your heart and breathing, this is a good thing. It has a role in activating dreaming and interacting with your more mature higher brain. More importantly, it's the "voice" that goes "boo" because it's always there, particularly when your higher brain is shut off and powerless. However, it also controls emotions, anxiety, adrenaline, and fight or flight response, which are quite unpleasant if they exhibit in the middle of the night when your higher brain is shut off. This causes incredibly awful dreams, night sweats and other unpleasant things.

The second issue is: It is NOT LOGICAL. In fact, it is the opposite of your logical brain. Your higher brain learns language, communication, ethics, society and how to be nice. None of these concepts rate at all with your Amygdala Your lizard brain wants a reward for successful food acquisition, and task accomplishment. Alcohol is an easy reward. So when your brain is away, your lizard is ready to play.

So when you stop drinking, there are multiple issues. One is the inability to fall asleep. The other is the inability to stay asleep, or if you do sleep to recover from the nighmares and stress of your lizard brain throwing a tantrum.

So what I found for myself, was that there isn't one solution to tackle all these issues. But if I chased the issues one-by-one I found a resolution which finally put my lizard to bed.

The first issue is melatonin. When you stop drinking your serotonin crashes, your pineal gland can't produce melatonin so you can't fall asleep. Here in the US melatonin is available in pill form. You can take 3mg as a "go to sleep" dose, and 5mg Time-Release (TR) is a good "stay asleep all night" dose. I also use a dropper form which is sort of a "I want to be sleepy right now" and that's just 1mg which lasts about two hours in me. If you stop drinking, your body's natural serotonin level should recover in 3-5 days, and at the end of a week you should be able to fall asleep naturally.

Staying asleep is harder. When you stop drinking your Amygdala is going to react to the loss of it's reward system. I can't logic with it, and it will throw a tantrum by elevating my adrenaline and giving me huge anxiety levels. In order to control this response, I needed to learn to communicate with the part of your brain that doesn't use logic or language. A couple ways I've found:

a) Deep breathing. Your lizard brain controls breathing, but to some degree breathing can control the brain. So learning to breath deeply, concentrating on the breath, for me will greatly decrease anxiety. You can google "4-7-8 breathing" for a zen technique that is easy to learn.

b) Exercise your body and your mind. Use your natural physical body to push toxins out, and to restore a natural metabolism. Our modern world is far too sedate. Cavemen were active much of the day. We need our healthy aerobics, strong exercise and physical movement every day. You also need to exercise your brain with challenges and growth. Only by being physically tired like a young person, can you achieve the sleep of a young person.

c) Faith. This can be faith in a higher power, or simply faith that you managed to survive every crisis so far in your life, and you will do fine with this one too. If the Amygdala is illogical, then fight it with illogic. Spend time obtaining some faith, and you can be the "sender of moods" as well as the receiver.

As for supplements, I have found Valerian useful at times. However, it makes me a bit queasy in my stomach. A dose that works for me has the side effect of lasting 24 hours, so I'm sleepy for over a day.

I use melatonin if I need help falling a sleep, and also as a remaining crutch for my old evening nightcap habit. If I'm feeling really needy I have a couple droppers of melatonine liquid which makes me a little drowsy and relaxed, just like my old friend used to do.

I've found Theanine useful, and use a Theanine/Gaba combined pill pretty commonly. Theanine is a mood stabilizer found in green tea, and Gaba is a brain chemical that promotes calming. This is not a sleep aid per-se, but it does relax. Prices vary but my favorite pill is $7 for a 30 day supply.

The key solution is free. Get on google and start learning about sleep. There are a lot of people dealing with insomnia, something like 20% of the adult population. At the very least, learning will make you tired and you'll sleep better. For me the biggest solution came from finding there's not one problem, but several, and to address each sub-problem with it's own unique solution.

I hope this information helps. Search this website too. There have been many threads on sleep and insomnia in the past. Good luck.

[Winefree]

questions about quitting

Wow, Bossman, you are a wealth of information on insomnia. You've done a great job in explaining the problem and offering many possible solutions. I can say I've tried many of them and agree not one thing will cure the problem. It's a matter of trial and error to see what will help the best for each of us.

Good luck to you drunky

Winefree

[drunky]

questions about quitting

thanks boss.man

Thank you so much for your thoughtful response! It is unbelievably helpful to me to have it broken down in such a way. I was actually just formulating my plan which includes a re-commitment to breath meditation, education, work, creativity, and exercise. I am happy that you have confirmed these as good ideas.
Congratulations on moderating your drinking. In the end, I still hope that I can drink socially. I come from a land of happy drunks who specialize primarily in beer and wine. My main concern is that I am drinking alone entirely out of habit. I am prioritizing drinking over eating. I hope that if I stop for 30 days I can break the habit and dependency and go back to drinking as a way of celebrating life's great moments. Maybe I am deluding myself. If I am I will re-assess.
Thank you again!

[universal]

questions about quitting

Drunky - you sound like you know what your plan is which is great. Boss man has given a lot of knowledge. I have also found that calms forte has really helped as a natural supplement for sleep too - 3-4 before bed and I find it helps me to sleep through the night. It is available here on this website as well as at health food stores and is not expensive.

Good luck!

[Teba]

questions about quitting

Bossman - Thank you for all the great info. I found it very helpful.

Universal - I also use the Calms Forte'. I take 2 at bedtime and sleep well. When I wake up I feel refreshed and mentally alert. No grogginess or hangover effect. It's cheap at Wal-Mart!

[queen of denial]

questions about quitting

Drunky,
I had the exact same problem as you talked about (insomnia, nightmares etc.)
All i can tell you is it did take a while but i am now sleeping better than i have ever in my adult life.
THe first week was the hardest & today is day 53 AF. The nightmares are GONE which is a gift in itself.
dont give up, be patient with yourself. At night i drink herbal tea or flavored water (not too much so i dont have to get up in the middle of the night to use r.r.) it also took me at least a month to learn to relax without AL. I am up to 6 to 7 hrs of uninterrupted deep sleep. the sleep issue and my fear of AL is what is keeping me sober at the moment and if I can do it I know you can.
Qof D