feel bad

[lovemylife]

I feel real bad today. I was having my bday party last night and i was really drunk and out of control.

And today, i feel so awful and low, i don't know why...maybe it's because i know i lost control over alcohol again... I just need to post it here and need to shout it out or i'll getting stressed and hate myself...

BTW-i'd been drinking almost everyday these few days and i really feel bad about it...I want to start my 3 days AF...please give me your support, i really need it now...:upset:

[DancingGirl]

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Lovemylife - we've all been there and struggled out (and in and out...) You can do it too.

Here are some hugs :l:l:l and a big wish for a better day. Start counting AF hours to get that first AF day.

Love,
Dancer

[greeneyes]

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Hi love! Yep, that guilt and shame.... Arrgggg! OK, that was yesterday, can't change that. Let's move on.

https://www.mywayout.org/community/f1...box-27556.html

Read through that and write down the things that ring your bell. The act of writing it down has an empowering effect so really do it.

Hang close! You can do it!

[christyacc]

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First of all, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!

Secondly, and certainly not last, don't beat yourself up. You can't change what happened, just learn from it. We have all been there, trust me! I am starting Day 1 today for what feels like the millionth time! I am not sad about it, I am not going to beat myself up. by beating ourselves up, we are merely giving up and giving ourselves an excuse to drink again because we feel so shi**y about ourselves. We need to break that chain.

Hang close to the boards, that helps. Occupy yourself.....drink lots of water and have some protein. Join the thread 7 days, or if that seems like to long of a time to commit, try the thread to string a few AF pearls together. Just no matter what, don't give up and never ever hate yourself.

[Amazon]

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Feel Bad

Happy birthday!

I can really relate to how you're feeling. I've had many, many (too many!) days like this myself. Alcohol is a depressant. We drink it and then wonder why we feel bad.

The best thing you can do today is to take care of yourself. Drink plenty of water, take an aspirin if your stomach can take it, and try to take a nap. Gatorade or another brand of sports drink might help. Some people use feeling bad as an opportunity to call up AA or someone else for support like your physician, therapist, or a friend. A person with some long term sobriety or a trained professional will really understand what you're going through. You have to do something different to break the cycle.

If you feel really bad, call 911 and get yourself to a hospital!! Alcohol is really toxic and depression can be dangerous.

You've been given another day of life. At the very least, try to find meaning in that. Know that we care. I do.

[lovemylife]

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Hi DancingGirl, Greeneyes and Christyacc,

Thank you for your support, i've been trying to quit so many times and yeah...i still failed today, i usually can control my drinking after some AFs but after a few days AL i will lose control again.

I know i shouldn't hate myself, but i really can't help it...cos i feel real bad. But, i will stop that right now. maybe i still can't feel good about myself but i at least i will try to move on.

Once again, thank you for reading this...hugs n kisses to you all

[lovemylife]

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Hi Amazon, thank you for your support. hugs n kisses for you too

[colbe]

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Happy Birthday! Why don't you plan another party, and try it again. Your friends might think your crazy, but that's ok. Just deny it. Tell them you forgot, but your real birthday is really next week, so you have to do it again. Maybe you'll even get MORE presents!

[lovemylife]

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Hi Colbe, good idea...lol

[Autobahn]

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Hey Love - just a quick note to say hang in there! It's a long and difficult journey but is so worth it. Quick question - do you have any ideas why you drink the way that you do? Do you get bored after a couple of days? Does the stress mount up to the point where drinking is your release? Does your mind feel like a mouse trapped in a wheel? That's the way it was for me, and I used alcohol as a way to shut it down and I am still in the process of learning how to rewire my thinking - and part of that is examining the reasons behind my first drink.

Anyway, best of luck to you and happy belated birthday!

[lovemylife]

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Hi Autobahn, honestly i am a pesimism and that always made me sad and depressed. when that happened i went to AL and I am just so forgetful that whenever i want to drink i will forget how the hang over and the guilty feeling i had after i drunk and lose control. I am trying to make myself happy, really, but it seems as difficult as stop drinking. i would like to find help, but my conditions just don't make it possible.

I really don't know what to do, i just hope this bad feeling will stop cos this make me want to drink again, just like now. I feel bad about last night, but i still want to drink, it's crazy, isn't it? thank god im at work right now, so that made me impossible to drink, but how about after I off from work?


well, of course i will not touch any AL or at least i will try not to touch it, cos i know i will feel worse tomorrow if i drink again tonight. My mind is really unstable now, and i think saying it out will make me feel better...thank you for reading this and for the supports. I really need that now.

[Autobahn]

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lovemylife;719534 wrote: ....I really don't know what to do, i just hope this bad feeling will stop cos this make me want to drink again, just like now. I feel bad about last night, but i still want to drink, it's crazy, isn't it?

Nope, not crazy at all. You want the bad feeling to go away and alcohol is the easiest way to do it, right? It really is baffling, cause once you start feeling better then your mind tells you that you can control and enjoy it this time around - that's the power of alcohol.

Just take it one day at a time, and focus on today. Have you read RJ's book yet? Great info in there that will help point you in the right direction, as well as on this website. I'll be sending good thoughts your way!

[lovemylife]

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Autobahn, yeah i had read the books and i stopped half way, i think i should read it again. well, at least keep my mind busy from those negative thinking. I want to start to like myself but it's really hard when i don't know where to start.

i think negative thinking is an addiction too and it's more danger than alcohol.

[Boss.man]

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I'm here for you too. Been there, done that. It CAN get better. Believe in yourself...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DXGwhjUQzrY[/video]]YouTube - Affirmations

(Ignore the first 10 seconds and last 10 seconds as an ad for "The Secret". Otherwise this is a great video I use for inspiration.

[lovemylife]

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Oh Bossman, thank you very much for the Affirmations link... it works just like magic, it really help me a bit and i think this is really a good start..