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    Coming Clean

    yep its about time I came clean and face the music ive been avoiding for a good few years. Ive always known ive drunk to much and to be honest enjoy it to such an extent that I drink every night and have done apart from a few nights for years. My wife likes a drink as well but doesnt suffer the after effects I do and she knows little about them. HUGE anxiety attacks that seem to be with me 1 hour after waking up until I get home from work and have a wine. Ive been taking meds for the panic attacks which now seem to have stopped working and now its crunch time. Ive gotta sort this shit out before it gets me too twisted. My life is chugging on and no one has ever told me to cut down drinking or stop because I suppose from the outside I look alright but the inside feelings of guilt and disgust I have for myself are all too true for me. I have a beautiful wee 4 yr old daughter and I dont want her seeing her father as a soak and a drunk. I dont get aggresive or do stupid things when I drink, in fact thats a lie. Ive fallen off my bike uti a few times and have had drunken breakdowns when Im in tears, and also hangovers I dont do very well! Why im here. I need help. I want to drink in moderation but dont know if I can. So that means cutting down towards stopping. The panic attacks I have are so deliberating and have sent me to the edge so stupidly to function at work Ive been taking meds to take the edge off which I know has the same chemical effect as alcohol. The question is.....How do I do it!!!!!!! Im gonna be busted soon so want to try and get my life back on track without the booze.

    Thats it!

    #2
    Coming Clean

    Congratulations for wanting to make a change and for coming clean on this site.

    I am also a high functioning drinker who knows the pain, lonliness and sadness that being under the contoling grasp of alcohol brings. I've been trying to moderate with out success and am coming to the cold hard fact that I cannot live a good and happy life if I keep letting alcohol rob me of my dignity, health and overall happiness.

    I am also afraid of how my constant drinking around my kids will effect them. I have a 4 year old too and am embarassed at how much he sees me drinking. Not much of an example I am afraid.

    Thanks you Sheri for the direction on starting out. I am ready to start again - this time with a goal to be AF. Moderation is not an option - just made things more painfull. I am going to try to get through tomorrow AF - my first Saturday without alcohol in a very long time...but it is certainly time for me to stop.

    Coming clean, what ever path you chose to take I wish you the best of luck in your journey...

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