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    First Time Here...

    Posting that is. I have been reading the forums (especially about Naltrexone) and am happy that I found you.
    My story is that I have drank to excess for about 25 years. Went into treatment 3 times..maybe even 4, I can't remember and each time I would quit for about a month to 6 months only to relapse again.
    The last time I went into treatment was after a binge of drinking myself to sleep for about 3 weeks straight. I woke, drank, slept. Sometimes I ate something in between but not often as it was hard enough to get enough liquor down me to quell the shakes and rapid heartbeat enough to pass out (relief) again. I usually had to throw-up over and over before I managed to keep enough down me for relief. I had to go into an emergency room when I could no longer walk to the bathroom to relieve my bladder. My legs were useless and I had to be carried out by emergency personnel. They sent me to a treatment center. After a few days I began to get back the use of my legs, slowly but surely. I still don't know why I lost use of them and heard not stories of anyone else having gone through such a thing but it was scary.
    After being released from the treatment center I began to go to AA. I had been before, quite a few times and figured I was just one of those for whatever reason could not be helped by AA.
    I tried hard and did ok for 6 months only to crash after an bad argument with my husband.
    I swore though that I would do anything in my power never to have to go to another treatment center. I tried to go back to AA but it was like my relapse was my excuse to drink "a little" again since I knew I could most likely work the program if I really wanted to. I just did not want to think that I could never EVER take another drink in my entire life again. It was just overwhelming to me even to consider it. Even when I was going to AA I was always feeling in the back of my head that I could never really stay off the booze for the rest of my life.
    Well, I vowed to never drink booze again. Just beer. It was cool at first, I got a buzz and was happy that I could drink in a more controlled way. And I did for a long time until I began to read about eating natural organic foods which led to making a lot of my own food. I even wanted to make my own vanilla extract from beans and 100 proof vodka. Only problem was that it did not take a lot of the vodka to make the extract and I don't like to be wasteful soooo, the only thing I could do was drink the vodka that was left over, AND when that was gone and I had no way to go for more, I drank the vanilla that I was making! And as soon as I could get more, I did. It was horrible. Only two fifths of vodka made me sick and the tremors, painful heartbeats, all of the misery came right back in no time.
    I sweated it out for 3 days drinking some beers to try and keep the tremors down. I know it was stupid to do it on my own but I did it. After that I quit for about a month then decided that it was ok to go back to only beer.
    And I drank beer for about 2 years and got sick many times still but nowhere near as badly as with the liquor. Nine to 12 a day (mostly only at night but occasionally I would have some in the morning or afternoon depending on how crappy I felt). They hardly gave me a buzz there at the end because I just could not drink enough to get the buzz I wanted.

    About 2 months ago I wanted to try some of the recipes I had been seeing on the food network and they included the use of wine in many of the recipes (how easily I could find a way to get more alcohol into me, what a joke) so I got some wine and long story short had a 2 month wine binge winding up with the sweats, shortness of breath, painful heartbeat etc just as before. During this drying out period when I was finally able to get out of bed and sit at my computer I begain searching for ANYTHING that would help me with my problem. AA was out of the question since I had tried it soo many times before.
    I read about Campral and thought wow, that might help me. If I don't crave alcohol maybe I can abstain from it. I had set up an appt to see my doctor and kept reading about it and suddenly the word Naltrexone started coming up, then the Sinclair Method was mentioned with a link that I clicked on and was elated to find.
    It sounded too good to be true but I just could not get enough of reading about people who were doing so well on the method and I figured I would ask my doctor about that and try it first.
    I was still drinking beer to help me get over the bout of wine so I got my prescription from my doctor and ordered the book that was recommended along with the Naltrexone (which I have not yet received) and began taking it this past Friday.
    The first night I drank only 4 beers, next night 2, and last night none. I don't know if having gotten past the sickness from the wine had anything to do with my cutting down (since I was finally feeling better) or not but I either way I am elated to think that I might be able to control my abusive drinking in some way and maybe even eventually quit altogether or at least be happy on much less.
    So here I am and I am here with lots of hope for better life. A life with a future other than trying to stay "unsick".
    I would love any and all advice as this Naltrexone is very new to me and also to my doctor who was kind enough to let me try it even though she was not too familiar with it.
    Sincerely, Brit

    #2
    First Time Here...

    Oh my god, Brit, you have been to hell and back. I am so happy you have come to this forum, and that you have found some meds that many people swear by. We each have to find our way out. You'll get lots of support here; I know, I've gotten it many times, and only today am starting to feel like a human being, after going through a similar, drinking around the clock binge!

    Keep us apprised of your progress and take care of yourself! I don't have much wisdom to give you at this point, but know you have lots of company!

    Ann

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      #3
      First Time Here...

      Welcome Brit...
      I'm so glad you found something that may help you. I don't know a lot about Nal but I'm sure others will come along that do.
      I just wanted to say hi!

      xo

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        #4
        First Time Here...

        Hi Brit,
        I relate to all you are going thru, I am 50yrs old and started drinking vodka at 13yrs...in my family drinking was the norm..

        I have been fighting the demon for the last 5yrs, have been in de-tox 3 times and same as you it didn't last long till the sneaky drinking started again thinking nobody would notice, coz we always knew where to hide it so well..! and that it wouldn?t hurt anyway...the one one we fool is ourselves..

        I tried AA as well, they are good, but to be honest this site bas given me so much strength and hope that I can do it this time.
        I found this site on friday morn, after I was scared I was gonna die if I stopped cold turkey,

        but I needed to, coz social services has my little boy and as of this week I gotta do random breath test and I gotta be clean, else I wont get him back in January.

        OK enough about me, but just to let you know I understand the hell you are going thru, so do all the guys on this site, they have helprd me so much and I feel cared for by people that understand and I don't feel alone thru all the shit & confusing pain, listen to them, they are a great family,

        I have been taking baclofen and for me it is working great, am still not 100%, but there is light at the end of the tunnel,

        Jan.

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          #5
          First Time Here...

          Hi Brit :welcome: I am so glad you found us and so glad that you are seeing some hope in your situation. We must always keep our hope alive and keep trying! Alcohol is so insidious for so many of us. There are many many people here at MWO who are staying sober one day at a time, and who are doing it utilizing a variety of methods and even combinations of methods. There is no right or wrong way. The best way is the way that works for YOU to stay sober.

          Strength and hope to you!

          DG
          Sobriety Date = 5/22/08
          Nicotine Free Date = 2/27/07


          One day at a time.

          Comment


            #6
            First Time Here...

            Hi Brit,
            I did have some experience w/ Nal. I tried the Sinclair Method to the exact plan. The thing w/ Sinclair, is that you are encouraged to drink (sounds wonderful, eh?) for a quite a period of time. The method is that Nal binds the receptors that tell us that al is fun. Basically prevent you from having a good time when you are drinking. That part worked for me. What I found, is that at some points I was drinking "more" because I found the breaking point. For the most part, I did drink less because it was almost pointless. The reason why I gave up on it is because, if your not careful, it takes the joy out of "other" things that you really like to do. For me that was my bowling and soccer league (I just started losing interest), and other things, like cooking and gardening. That is one of the side affects. Now I don't mean to deter you from this because it does work for some people. For me it wasn't worth it. It's worth a try and basically, it won't hurt you (unless you do the drinking more thing, try not to, it's not worth it, you still get the hangover). I'm all for whatever it takes to get you where you are going and trying different things until you find what works for you.
            For me, it was cutting off the wine completely. I was a hot mess when I drank wine (thank God I only drank that alone, so only my lucky husband got to bear witness to that). Then I switched to beer only. I would never get "as drunk" as I would usually get full before I could get to that point. Then I stopped drinking daily. Eventually, I set a day in mind that was manageable and quit. Now mind you, I am only on day 16 and have leaps and bounds to go. I also "threw" myself into this program as I had been selfish and mostly read others posts without offering help. I don't have alot of advice, but try to lend support or advice where I can.
            So that's it. Maybe not a great success story w/ the Sinclair Method but like I said, it DOES work for others. Hope I was able to help. Stick around and let us know how you are doing w/ it.
            Remember, yourself is the best platform from which to jump!
            AF since 2/4/10
            Nicotine free since 3/31/10
            FINALLY FREE

            Comment


              #7
              First Time Here...

              It took a ton of guts to post that. A ton.

              Look there (your strength and inner motivation to overcome this) when temptation keeps barking at you to just let him innocently outside to pee. He's going to run away again -- only a matter of time. It's his instinct to do so. But you open the door, or not.

              It's been a "best friend" for too long, and knows how to push your buttons and get a belly scratch from you.

              Best of luck. Heal the body. Tend the soul.

              And reach out to these good folks here.

              M

              Comment


                #8
                First Time Here...

                Hi Brit,

                Welcome to MWO, this is a good place!
                Thank you for sharing your story, that was very brave. You have had a very long & difficult struggle with AL. I hope the Naltrxone continues to helps you, that's great! Please keep reading & posting here you will receive a lot of support which helps so much.

                Wishing you continued success & good health!
                Lav
                AF since 03/26/09
                NF since 05/19/09
                Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

                Comment


                  #9
                  First Time Here...

                  ladyjan can you describe how bac makes you feel i have got some but too scared to use it, scared how its going to make me feel
                  Twitch

                  Comment


                    #10
                    First Time Here...

                    OMG! Thanks so much for the encouragement everyone. I was embarrassed yesterday about all I revealed and was almost too ashamed to come back but reading all the kind words from you all made me cry. Thank you!
                    I am sorry that any of you have had to suffer but I am glad that you are here to help me see that I really am not alone.
                    LadyJan, I so hope that you can get your son back. That must be so painful on top of everything else. I wish that I could hug you and tell you that it will all be ok but I can give a mental hug and just did

                    Shirazgirl, 16 days is wonderful especially on your own. I applaud you.

                    MrS I know that monster is knocking 24/7. It has let me have hope so many times before only to catch me offguard time after time. And yes, it is my best friend cos it is there when every else turns away. It soothes me when I am down then tries to kill me. Hope and help is all I have against it cos willpower was never there to stand up for me. Thanks for the kind words.

                    Doggygirl, Thanks for the warm welcome and encouragement and way to go on your sobriety and your freedom from nicotene. I quit smoking 4/15/2005. I always thought that it would be easier to give up drinking than it would smoking.. I was wrong!

                    Hi Angelcakes and ty for the warm welcome

                    Crazyforwine, I guess you have done the round the clock thing too and know what horror it is. Just a slow and painful death cycle. I hope that you and I both can find happiness outside of that place. To me, (at the time) it seemed the best answer to a life that had become unbearable and it is really a wonder I survived it! I am pretty certain that I will not live through too many more of those bouts if even one more.
                    Anyway, thanks for the encouragement.
                    Thanks to all of you!
                    Brit

                    Comment


                      #11
                      First Time Here...

                      Hello Lavande and thanks! I think I will be around for a while (sure hope to be cos if not it will probably mean I fell again But I don't want to think of that!
                      Thanks for the welcome.
                      Brit

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                        #12
                        First Time Here...

                        private message

                        tawnywitch;740084 wrote: ladyjan can you describe how bac makes you feel i have got some but too scared to use it, scared how its going to make me feel
                        Hi tawnywitch, check your private messages
                        ladyjan

                        Comment


                          #13
                          First Time Here...

                          :welcome: Brit~ I'm glad you found MWO , I'm fairly new here too , the people here are amazing , looking forward to our journey , we're all in this together:l Em
                          Non Drinker 9/09
                          Non Smoker 6/09
                          Tennis Anyone ?

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                            #14
                            First Time Here...

                            hi and :welcome: brit,this is a great community with lots of support and advice,no judges chambers here. hope you stick around.dont quit quitting :goodjob:


                            :congratulatory: Clean & Sober since 13/01/2009 :congratulatory:

                            Until one is committed there is always hesitant thoughts.
                            I know enough to know that I don't know enough.

                            This signature has been typed in front of a live studio audience.

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                              #15
                              First Time Here...

                              Just a quick little note to say I am just beginning week 3 on the Naltrexone and TSM and am feeling happy and very very hopeful!
                              I found The Sinclair Method forum and have been posting there but remembered that this forum is actually where I first read about Nal so wanted to let you all know things are going well.
                              Cheers!
                              Brit

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