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    #16
    Very New To This

    :new:~
    Hi ToBeTrue
    Like many of the post already your story sounds so similar to mine!
    I actually found this site by complete accident on sunday and ended up in the chat room for an hour... it was amazing! What I love is that everyone is brutally honest and leaves their egos out of it.

    I have been drinking excessively for many years and it is now up to at least two bottles of wine at home and can be more if im out.

    I finally decided about 3 weeks ago that I couldnt go on, I CANT be a social drinker no matter what I try to tell myself, I NEVER just have a couple. I have thought about little else over the past few weeks and actually have cut back on the no. of nights I have been drinking.

    I like you thought it was maybe a cop out to not stop immediately but I have decided to stop Jan 1st, I dont like cliches so its not about it being a new year resolution its just that if I stop now in the party season Im more likely to fail and then comes the beating myself up!

    I REALLY want to do this and in Jan its not unusual for people to detox so I would get less pressure from friends to drink then hopefully when they realize im doing it for good I will be feeling stronger.

    These few weeks have also allowed me to really examine what I have allowed to happen and its the 1st time I have faced up to many things. It didnt stop be going out last week and falling over bruising my ribs but it did make me see I dont want to live like this anymore.

    As you are stopping on the 4th Jan lets keep in touch and help each other through it,
    just talking to someone whos going through the same will be great. My friends have no idea just how much I drink, they think we occasionally go out and get pissed and dont know about my drinking at home, right now Im not ready to share that with people I know so that why this website is SO fantastic!

    Please keep in touch
    "In the depths of winter I finally learned there was in me an invincible summer ."
    AF - JAN 1st 2010
    NF - May 1996

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      #17
      Very New To This

      TBT- I am fairly new here as well so welcome! I, like others here, can relate to almost all of your story except substitute vodka for wine.

      Your second to last paragraph really hit home on many fronts. I won't bore you with my details on this post but try and "crack this" asap because it can get worse and it did for me. I am also afraid of a life without drinking so I'm still looking for my way out. I think that if you stick around this site the good people here will help you achieve whatever goal it is that you are looking for. Wishing you all the best on this journey.

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        #18
        Very New To This

        Closer To Free;773038 wrote: TBT- I am fairly new here as well so welcome! I, like others here, can relate to almost all of your story except substitute vodka for wine.

        Your second to last paragraph really hit home on many fronts. I won't bore you with my details on this post but try and "crack this" asap because it can get worse and it did for me. I am also afraid of a life without drinking so I'm still looking for my way out. I think that if you stick around this site the good people here will help you achieve whatever goal it is that you are looking for. Wishing you all the best on this journey.
        It's when that switch happens and instead of downing a bottle of wine a day, it's the vodka that you know you're in trouble.

        And the reasons you do it are completely bizarre - the funniest one is that a bit of you thinks nobody can smell alcohol on you! And if you're really pissed at your life that day - which is most of the time - you can just throw in a few glasses of wine on top round about 10pm and curse the world until your heart's content. And yet if you're like me, you can continue on that path for a few years and still just about hold on to the fraying bits.

        And then there's the stop start stop start so your effectively binging. And god the withdrawals - I swear I was awake for a straight 72hrs this time, I was so shit scared.

        These vits work. I feel 100 times better than this time last week.

        Best of luck new people. We deserve this if we reall want this.
        "It's a scientific fact that if you stay in California you lose one point of your IQ every year."

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          #19
          Very New To This

          Hi TBT,

          I just found this site today and I read your post. Your post reminds me so very much of my drinking pattern - the same. And, I know it is a real problem. And, I am trying to pick a good day to stop. And, scared about not having the luxury of still having a social drink or 2 now and then. But, I have been trying that recently and after a couple beers at the pub, I just can't just leave it that - I find myself ordering 3,4,5,6... Then hungover at work next day (miserable). Then, I can go a day without going to pub (most times, not all), but second day I end up back a pub even though I don't want to - it just happens - I don't know - its like I don't have control. So, anyway I am glad I stumbled on this site too and glad I saw your post, as I saw myself in it. Hope you stay here and write more.

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            #20
            Very New To This

            Hi This Way Out
            :welcome:
            Welcome to MWO, I only found it last weekend,
            after a few days AF Im afraid I have fallen badly by the wayside and again last night which was suposed to be a meal out & a couple of drinks ended up being probably 12 drinks and home at 3am.... another wasted saturday!

            I am getting so fed up of it I really think its time but like you say, one AF day and you feel great again so end up drinking....
            "In the depths of winter I finally learned there was in me an invincible summer ."
            AF - JAN 1st 2010
            NF - May 1996

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              #21
              Very New To This

              Hi Chillgirl,

              Nice to meet you. Sorry about your falling. Same also happened to me Thursday night. Friday I was completely disgusted with myself and thats when I found this site. This must be a familiar pattern with some people. My so-called plan (idea) was to just drink on Wed and Sat night and keep it in moderation. Then I decided just Sat night only. Great plan. But, this last week, somehow it ended up to be Mon, Wed and Thurs. So Friday I felt like a failure. Now, today is Sat, starting to feel better. When I drive past the pub tonight will my car automatically turn in that direction under it own power again? This cycle is insane. I don't want this.

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                #22
                Very New To This

                Hi TWO
                I have drank every night since tue and usually stay home sat, watch tv and have a couple of bottles but I feel crap today and dont want to feel crap tomorrow of I will have wasted another weekend!
                Im going to try not to tonight but its so hard as i tell myself, go on its saturday, you can stop tomorrow. Its the usual cycle and I hate it,
                "In the depths of winter I finally learned there was in me an invincible summer ."
                AF - JAN 1st 2010
                NF - May 1996

                Comment


                  #23
                  Very New To This

                  I think you have a good plan. I found that I couldn't quit on my own, no matter how many times I made promises to myself. It takes more than just putting down the drink. Getting the help and support in recovery, following a plan etc was the only thing that helped me accomplish longer periods sober. Welcome to MWO.

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                    #24
                    Very New To This

                    Hi Peoples,
                    The thing that really suprised me about MYO when I joined ( Yonkers ago) was that the main contributers were female. Not by design; just reality. Is it easier for men to admit to a drinking problem? I know that I could say to friends that I was an alkie and so couldn't drink and they just shrugged and said " So what?"
                    Is there a hidden group of us out there?
                    Long Road
                    Nobody can make you feel inferior without your permission--
                    Eleanor Roosevelt

                    Comment

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