I don't drink every day or every weekend. But I find it is hard to stop at one when I do drink. The first drink doesn't always taste so good, but the second one.....Hmmm....I live alone and sometimes give myself permission to have more than one beer (or glass of wine) because I'm not driving and heck, how much trouble can I get into all alone? But when I see 4 empty beer cans or an almost empty wine bottle, I think "uh oh"...
Two Christmases ago, I had too much wine at my sister's house and said some things that made them worry about me (things like not being happy with my life, feeling like a failure, still angry at the past, etc). I was very embarrassed and really regretted it the next day...I was feeling overwhelmed with work, school and possibly moving....
Some things have settled down since then, but my little sister just got married to a really nice, cute guy two months ago. I was her m.o.h. and it was a great wedding. I watched my drinking and didn't overdo it. Wanted to do a good job as her m.o.h. ...I have a big family (a few brothers are single) but I'm the only single sister now. No one is really putting pressure on me but I'm starting to feel skipped over, left out......(I'm over 40 - not a spring chicken and no prospects in sight - but I don't try that hard anyway)...
Everyone in my family drinks (some more than others). My maternal grandpa (was from Ireland and had the curse)...I felt a strong urge to buy wine the other day but resisted....I worry I might give into temptation with the holidays approaching, seeing the happy "newlyweds", etc....
:thanks: for listening. Peachy
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