Hey there!

[Miss_Dixie]

:new: Hi everyone, this is my first day here, just registered and all :-)

I'm going to read around a good bit before posting much, I'm sure. I have been wanting, for a long time, to cut back. Oddly, the more I thought about cutting back, the more I started drinking daily. Now it's rare that a day is gone without me drinking...and I'm a single mom, so I'm not doing anyone any favors by keeping this up.

[Suzanna]

Hey there!

Hey there Miss Dixie, I'm a newbie too. Been drinking wine everyday for a very long time. You will find alot of people here who share similar symptoms and stories and we all support each other. This is a great program. I have cut down alot although I am not taking the topamax. The book is great and you can download it for free for now. Welcome!:welcome:

[freckles]

Hey there!

dixie - i feel you on the harder you try the more you drink thing...i've found hope and i'm glad you're here!

[dazzed_23]

Hey there!

Miss Dixie, I'm a newbie myself...I can tell you that I've met really nice people who share the same feelings and similar symptoms. I just love how everyone is so supportive. hang in there! There sure is hope!

[jane]

Hey there!

Feeling lost!

Hi, Im new too! I have been doing the wine thing each night for 15 years. Im in my mid thirties now, a single parent all my adult life with a stressful job. This habit cuts you off from many aspects of proper living. I have tried to stop, but then I can spend nights without sleeping, as the drink has quite simply for so many years - knocked me out. It does make you down and I would wish for an easy way out, but as a single parent thats not an option as I have a child - who is now 15, to bring up. I really hope that there is an answer in this programme. I have nt seen a Dr yet about topomax. Have just moved countries and not sure of the system here.

[Miss_Dixie]

Hey there!

thanks for the welcome!

Thanks for the warm welcome! Tonight will be a big challenge for me. I have a big girls' night out to go to.

Instead of wine, I'm taking an appetizer. But I'm sure I'll end up drinking. I've started out ok, though. Instead of stopping at the store on the way home from work, I just came right home, took the rest of my vitamins, drank a bunch of water and took a long shower. Normally, I'd have been "woohoo, It's Friday, time to driiiiink!" @@

So, at least I won't be showing up at 8 with a couple of drinks down already, and that's an improvement. I really hope I can just have a glass of wine, or a weak vodka and soda and alternate with a lot of soda water. I'm pretty much assuming this is how this process will have to go for me. I'm not a good "do it now" cold turkey type of person :-)

[Miss_Dixie]

Hey there!

Not sure if this is necessary, but I'm home now.

[lushy]

Hey there!

Well, how did you do Miss Dixie? I know it is hard at social events. One of my biggest downfalls.....hope you did well. Please keep posting here. You will find you can make changes, if even small ones, by staying in touch here.....

[Miss_Dixie]

Hey there!

I didn't do well. I had wine and tequilla! After all that hope and talk on my part, I just fell right into it. So, today I feel like crap, my throat hurts, etc. (misc. whining, LOL!)

I'm glad I passed up the drinking before the event. And I have a new day to work on, so I will just keep trying I guess.

[Miss_Dixie]

Hey there!

I am supposed to go to a concert tonight with three friends who are also big drinkers. I really want to volunteer to be the DD but am scared I won't have any willpower once we arrive there. I am going to try to do though.

[Miss_Dixie]

Hey there!

I feel like such crap today. I hate white wine!

I just cancelled tonight on my friends. I am going to take my Broker's exam Monday (I was on a waiting list to get in early and just got that call) -- I am relieved that I have an excuse not to drink.

I hope I haven't killed so many brain cells since I was studying a lot that I flunk it.

[lushy]

Hey there!

Miss Dixie, I so know what you are going through as that was my weekend last weekend. I had no food to eat and too much wine and completely lost my Saturday. I swear I am never doing that again. It was a beautiful weekend here and I just blew it all away sitting in my house feeling like crap. I hope you start feeling better soon. Probably a good idea that you canceled your plans tonight. At least you can be assured you will feel good in the morning. Good luck on your broker's exam......

[Miss_Dixie]

Hey there!

I think the worst part of all of this is how I (apparently a lot of us here, too) beat myself up mentally with this.

I talk to myself at night, in the mornings about why and how this is so bad for me, but I keep doing it.

I'm starting a new career! If I DO NOT get a handle, I will not succeed. It is that important. I hope to gain strength.

[kayjay]

Hey there!

Hang in there, Miss Dixie

Hi there-

Please don't be hard on yourself, changing ANY habit is not easy. Remember, it's a process, sometimes accomplished in baby steps. The fact that you didn't drink BEFORE your girls' night out was a huge step. Previously, I've typically gotten half tanked at home before going out.

I know what you said about not doing things cold turkey, but in many ways it was easier for me that way. I'm sort of an all-or-nothing person, and it's usually easier for me to cut something out altogether than just do a little. That's why I see my ultimate goal of moderate drinking as such a challenge.

I really prepared for my first day of abstinence. I picked a date approximately 2 months in the future, so I had a lot of time to think about it. I chose a date significant to me (a special relative's birthday), and I chose the timing so that I wouldn't be away with my husband on vacation (when I ALWAYS find an excuse to drink heavily). I also squeezed it between any events I might find particularly difficult; like wine tasting at a nearby winery (DUH!), a special dinner celebration, my birthday, etc., etc. It definitely took some planning, but I figured it out. Just remember that your mind (that is ALWAYS interested in what's comfortable for you) will always come up with a convincing reason why it's not a good time to quit anything with pleasure attached. THERE IS NO PERFECT TIME. Just pick a date and stick to it.

I also found a smooth stone with the word "courage" printed on it. I carry it around in a pocket everywhere I go (right now it's in my bathrobe pocket). Whenever I start wanting to quit the abstinence, I touch the stone and remeber what it's for...to give me courage.

The insomnia thing was tough the first few nights, but I got through it. What has worked for me in the past, and what I tried my second night of sleeplessness was Valerian. You can find it in any health food store (and often pharmacies). It seems mild yet effective, I noticed no drug hangover or other problematic side effects.

Wow, I'm sure writing an epistle, aren't I? Sorry about that.

One of the biggest helps has been finding My Way Out, quite by accident. I was 2 weeks into abstinence when I stumbeld upon it and I've found it to be just what I needed. I have few friends that are in the same boat: either they are heavy drinkers and are unwilling to look at changing things or they have no problem with alcohol and can't relate to my experience. It makes a world of difference having a common experience with others and being able to talk about your issues and having people GET IT and be
supportive. The folks here are AMAZING! When I first read a posting, I thought, Oh my God, that's me!!

So, hang in there, Miss Dixie. I'm rooting for you!

Best,

Kayjay

[Miss_Dixie]

Hey there!

Thank you Kayjay! What a sweet and supportive post!

I am feeling MUCH better today. Having the studying to keep me busy and focussed is at least one goal I have (at least until tomorrow!)