My Biggest Trigger is...

[savon19]

ANGER!! And what's yours?

I Really came close to going to store for a bottle today (already!). And this is after a month and half AF...

Won't go into details of what made me angry, but driving home from the "situation", I came SO close to buying both AL and cigs (I've quit cigs now for 30 days!)...

One of the things that popped into my mind that I think actually helped was when I said the thing we use on quit smoking site: N.O.P.E. (Not One Puff Ever)... and then I added: COPE!!

This is the hardest part of it. Finding Different ways to cope with strong feelings, anger being the worst.

I'm still shaky about it, and it's a couple hours after the fact. I honestly don't know if I'll make it through the day...

Although another thing that's helping is kind of a funny one. I bought beautiful piece of salmon yesterday that is in frig. Didn't eat last night, so Really should tonight. And if I drink... POOF. That won't happen. I sure don't want to waste it!

(Hmmmm. Wonder if it would still be tasty tomorrow??)

[Lavande]

My Biggest Trigger is...

Just don't do it Savvy, just don't do it!!!!!
Drinking or smoking are not options anymore, right?

I've worked my way through anger by doing something physical - taking a walk, painting a room, cleaning out the chicken coop - whatever!!!!

Congrats on both your quits - keep em going!!

[MommyDearest72]

My Biggest Trigger is...

Hi Savon....I wonder how you stopped smoking...thats something I want to do next....Pls stay strong and do whatever it is that you've been doing- it must've worked! Peace and Love-L.

[caysea]

My Biggest Trigger is...

Hi All
Yes anger was one of my biggest triggers. The way i resolved this was to realize I would let no person or thing be the reason i ever drank again. If it is a person you are angry with, is it not losing more by allowing them to be a reason you drink. It is as if they got even more from you than what ever the situation was . They took the most important thing from you your sobriety. Are you getting even with the person or ruining your life.{i know the getting even thing is not good i am working on that].
I really liked that you could step back and look at the situation. That is something i am learning. My answer to being angry before was to go grab a beer. Now you and I are learning the coping skills we didn't develop when we were young. Way to go thinking through the situation.

Stay Healthy and Keep Fighting
AF 5-16-08

[lilmea]

My Biggest Trigger is...

Savvy-Hang in there. Don't let that person have so much power over you that you give up your sobriety.

You are doing great so enjoy that salmon, af.

[jessie]

My Biggest Trigger is...

Savvy, you are great for overcoming the moment. Anger and frustration are my big triggers ( I seem to have over come the loneliness) but only time will tell what will hapen when anger comes my way.
You're strong.

[hippie37]

My Biggest Trigger is...

My biggest trigger is my emotions or feelings. When I allow my often warped sense of what's right and wrong in, my emotions will usually take over (IF I allow them too). The primary feeling is usually a knee jerk reaction and needs NEVER to be acted upon. I usually take a time out and try to listen to what my intuition is telling me. That has only come with building up a sense of awareness around my feelings so I'm able to tell the difference between the two. It will get easier Savon if you keep using the tools you are using and don't act irrationally on that first thought. It's those thoughts that cause us to feel the way we do about ourselves and the situations we find ourselves in. It's why I drank for so long because my core beliefs about myself were that I was weak, inferior, no good etc. So I had to behave in a way that compensated for those feelings and in effect why I drank. I had to change completely the way I viewed myself to be honest. I had to learn to love myself and not give myself a hard time over things.

You're doing okay! Give yourself a break and be proud you didn't drink today and you're 30 days from your last fag! Well done!!

Love and Light
Phil
xx

[Hippy Chick]

My Biggest Trigger is...

My biggest triggers are anger (usually at my teenager) and boredom both which I am trying hard to work on.
Caysea said it so well about not letting someone else take away something that is so important to us.
Enjoy your salmon Savon.
Hippy Chick

[savon19]

My Biggest Trigger is...

Hi - ALL of you responded in such a positive way. Thanks so much for taking the time to give me some strength through your words. IT WORKED!

I managed to stay both sober and smober (lol - the word used for those not smoking!)... and I did this WITHOUT cleaning out a chicken coop, Lavande, I'm happy to say!

Although my anger wasn't exactly about one person, it still caused that "knee-jerk" reaction that Hippie mentioned. The one that used to put me in robot-mode, auto-driving to buy AL. The lesson for me is that I am stronger than that (*&^*) Robot!!

And, to be totally honest, buying AL would just be an excuse to buy smokes - which is probably what I'm yearning for more than AL at this point!!

I agree with you, Jessie, that Frustration is a very close second to Anger as a trigger... I came close to giving in to that one a few days ago when the software for my new external HD wouldn't install! In the past (LIKE saying that!!)... that would have called for a "time out", chain-smoking while thinking the problem through... (yeh right).

Loneliness & Boredom often come intertwined... but can definitely be triggers. They may be more insidious, but that can mean they can wear you down until you "give in" to the urge.

Due to the fact that I did NOT give in to this urge yesterday, I was able to go get haircut and interviewed with people about an interesting volunteer position.

Had I bought booze... the afternoon/evening would have been a foggy memory at best today, and I would have woken up praying I didn't get on phone or email (YIKES).

Oh... AND I cooked the salmon which was Delish!

I hope I learned a good lesson from this. And I hope it may have served as encouragement to others - showing that it IS possible to do this... and the outcome is soooo much better if we can be strong.

One last thought (sorry, too much java!)... I've noticed this maybe more about quitting smoking, but I think it's true, too, for quitting AL: each time we conquer an urge, it does makes us stronger. It accumulates and builds.

Thanks, again, for helping me to think all this through!

[dlw]

My Biggest Trigger is...

MY TRIGGER- Myself! and being alone- I also figured out that I cannot even moderate AL. it grabs me into its clutches when I am most vulnerable, Like a beast tapping on my shoulder waiting for me to let my guard down!

[Cinders]

My Biggest Trigger is...

Savon,

My biggest trigger is simply being awake.

I will drink when I am angry, happy, bored, stressed, just plain living.

I finally figured that out.

Love,
Cindi

[OverIt2007]

My Biggest Trigger is...

Savon,

Greetings from your neighbor and friend. You came close to the edge, verrry close, but the end result was that you conquered and WON! I am very proud of your progress, I know its a battle, somedays are easier than others, but the point is that you are doing it. Im in awe of you, friend, and you are inspiring me and many others. Even when you dont feel it, or even know it.

I am with Cinders, everything seems to be a trigger for me too, and some days its just easier to give in than fight the battle. Some days I just dont have that fight in me.

Looking forward to posting more, my computer has been down for months!


Love,

Overit