A bumpy start

[luvtozin]

I'm in day 4 of being AF after about 6 years of drinking just about every day - the most i could ever get through would be 2 days except for a 9 day stint when I was a chaperone for a youth group.

I started the MWO program (hypno cds and supplements) a week and a half ago, but continued drinking through the first 8 days. On day 7, i picked up the MWO book again and read that if I wasn't taking an anti-craving supplement, I could try more Kudzu - so I did - the maximum dosage recommended and the next Monday, I didn't drink. I also re-read the directions for the hypno cd and was more intentional about thinking about goals before I started listening.

So here I am at day 4 - it feels like it has been such a long time since I had a drink. Last night I came home from work late and my spouse had opened a bottle of wine that had just arrived from our favorite winery. I thought about it for several long minutes, and decided not to have any. Today I came home proud that I had not stopped at the liquor store and found a bottle of wine outside the door - I think from one of my neighbors - one who I often borrow wine from when it is too late to buy any.

I don't feel like drinking right now, but I am scared. Will I really be able to keep this up? I am not planning to be AF forever, but I did note that it is recommended to be AF for 30 days. I do feel good and it has been great to remember what it is like to not drink. I will be reading more here to keep me going.

Thanks for listening

[ptg109]

A bumpy start

Welcome Luvtozin,
I've only been here a little over a week myself, but the information and support has been terrific. Keep reading and I'm sure that you will find a story or comment that helps you. My spouse is also still drinking and it does present an extra challenge. You're doing great - just take it one day at a time.

[akgirl]

A bumpy start

Hello and :welcome:

Sounds like you are doing great! Stay strong!

[MommyDearest72]

A bumpy start

I wish you strength Luv, in whatever your AF goal is! We are all here for you!

[savon19]

A bumpy start

Gee, that makes it harder when wine just keeps popping up! Good for you that you decided against drinking it.

I think 30 days AF is a really good goal. It's a long enough period of time to feel the good things about being AF. Some people decide to moderate after that...

[leaveinsilence]

A bumpy start

Luv you're doing really well:l I'm on day 12 AF now but found day 4 my hardest that was when I wanted to crumble but I didn't and I'm so glad that I didn't. Well down for turning down the wines, those first few days there always seems to be some temptation around.. I'm trying Kudzu too now...

Just take it little by little:l

[Doggygirl]

A bumpy start

Hi Luvtozin and welcome. Congratulations on 4 AF days! Those first days can be so challenging and you are doing it!! :yougo:

You mention you don't want (plan) to be AF forever. I assume you are here because drinking is somehow problematic for you. Are you thinking that somehow drinking will cease to be problematic? Just wondering. I think when I first came here I secretly hoped that somehow, something would magically change and I would somehow be able to drinking normally (i.e. 1 or 2 and then STOP). You might save yourself some of the grief that I went through and many others have been though by just sort of thinking about that one. For me that was quite the fairy tale.

Strength and hope to you on your journey!!

DG

[Meech]

A bumpy start

Good words here. I like you Doggygirl have thought for a long time I could figure out a way to be moderate but who am I kidding? If I could moderate I wouldn't be in this mess and looking for support. I am new here and hoping to find strength to really succeed as I have failed at every attempt at the past. But maybe the key was now I have support. Before I had none.

Luvotzin, I am cheering for you. Hope you made it to day 5.

[Sky]

A bumpy start

Great post Doggy.

Well done Luv on 4 days and not giving in to temptation placed in front of you.

[mollyka]

A bumpy start

Well don Luv 4 days tough 5 days easier and on and on.... read the posts of these wonderful people in all the different forums they dragged me through in the nicest way (sometimes kicking and screaming in my head) the first few days and then supported me in a mindblowing way, personally this site is more effective than any meds or supps could be, when I feel weak I just come on here distract myself and then go back stronger to the real world
Good luck

[Jane Thompson]

A bumpy start

Hi Mollyka, just wanted to reinforce what you've said - after 3 sober days I feel so much more confident that I can stay AF free because of this site. I don't 'know' anyone but the advice and support feels really 'real' - I've never discussed my problem with anyone, or heard so many stories which resonate so much. Temptation will always be there for me - we own a vineyard for goodness sake! At least we don't have a winery, we just sell grapes, but I live in a vineyard region and wine is everywhere! Anyway, I've been reading as much as I can on the site and am looking forward to getting to 'know' (and maybe help) a few people going through similar situations.