Here I go again...

[M22]

Here I go again...

Hi,
I know in my heart you are absolutly 100% right but wow...how hard is this! I've been using that tool, leaveinsilence. Only I use it a little different. I have a bottle of wine in my kitchen, I keep telling myself that If I really want or need it, it is there. That's how I got through yesturday reminding myselt that yesturday was a weekday and that tomorrow is Friday if I want a drink I will do it on Friday because it's a weekend but I guess that bottle will be there tomorrow as well in case I really need or want it tomorrow. Right?
M

[Meech]

Here I go again...

Hi M22,

I work tonight so I won't be able to talk to you until tomorrow. I really hope when I check in you will be AF3.

EAT EAT EAT. That squashes (pardon the punn) my apetite for drinking.

Last weekend I went through the same thing. I could sleep in the whole next day if I wanted to hungover so why not? I've done so well.
But then I thought what would it be like to wake up fresh and not hungover on Sunday. Sundays were ALWAYS my really hungover day.

Just because I didn't have to work or do anything - IT DIDN'T MAKE ME FEEL ANY MORE PROUD OF MYSELF WAKING UP FEELING LIKE CRAP. I got to sleep in but I still hated myself.

the 3rd day is the prickly day (someone told me that). Although everyday is still tough I remember the 3rd being the hardest. Get it over with so you can move onto day4.


Please try the following and all the other great advice from everyone first. If it doesn't work, it doesn't work. but please try some AF tools first....
- Up your L-glute this afternoon.
- Keep saying to yourself AF3 tomorrow moving to AF4. Has a nice ring to it?
- Stock up on some yummy non-AL drinks tonight. that takes the edge off.
- You'll be so proud of yourself when you hit the pillow sober tonight
- Think about how happy you were last night after conquering AF2 and making cupcakes, the happy time you spent with your daughter

Sarasmiles told me once to go into the bathroom look in the mirror directly into your eyes and say "I'll take care of you". PLEASE DO THIS.
You just have to fight off one drink - THE FIRST ONE.

You can do it. You will be over the top, ridicoulously giddy with happiness if you can fight it. I will be thinking, praying and rooting for you all night!
:yougo:

Be this tomorrow
:happy::rays::kudos:


Not this :durn:


Talk to you tomorrow. :l

[M22]

Here I go again...

Tomorrow is another day.

Hi Everyone,
I caved tonight. I had 2 glasses of wine. I am disappointed but I am not going to beat myself up. I did 2 AF and I am very proud of that. I have not done that in more than 7 years. Today I had a bad day and had wine. Normally on a friday I will be up unitl 3-4 am getting drunk. I am done. I am watching television with my daughter " cake boss" I told her to pause it for just one minute so that I can post and let you guys know that I did cave tonight but I am still more optomistic tonight than I have been in years. If I have learned anything from this site is not to beat myself up just keep on trying. Tomorrow is another day. I will keep you guys posted.
Good-night.
M

* Although I had Wine tonight I still feel as though I grown and I owe it all to you guys.
Please don't loose faith in me.
22

[Meech]

Here I go again...

It's okay

:bump:

Hi M22,

When I first went on MWO I went 2AF, then I think a few 3 day AF's. Might have even done a few AL2's. It's baby steps. And you have done amazing this week.

You are right don't beat yourself up. Give yourself a hug for accomplishing AF2 this week. That was great. And work on another AF2. Then maybe it'll be AF3.
Treat yourself like your own best friend. :l

Don't look to far into the future. One day at a time.

Plus - you didn't go nuts and get completely drunk till 4am.

You are definitely getting stronger, and making progress. You are getting better and you are changing. Be proud of having another nice time spent with your daughter. You have come along way in just a week.

Baby steps. One day at a time. I'm proud of you. And we are all here at MWO cheering you on!

Talk to you tomorrow.

[M22]

Here I go again...

Another day...

Good Morning,
I just woke up and first thing I did was post. This site has given such strength. Meech as I read your reply I cried. I have never felt that someone would actually listen and not judge. I was almost scared to post again. For one minute I said "I messed up maybe I won't go on anymore" then I did and read how proud and such encouraging words. Thank you! I did have my wine last night. I am going to be honest I am glad that I did. I woke up this morning expecting to be hung over with a headache. I'm not. That is a huge accomplishment for me but to be able to compare the difference between getting up sober and getting up knowing that you had a drink when you really didn't have. I could have done 3AF. The fact that it was a weekend scared me. I would always think that weekends are to drink and socialize. I just have to find a way to substitute. I really need to focus today. I am going to take some time today to create a plan.

Have a wonderful day.
Talk to you later.
M22
:thanks:

[Jolie]

Here I go again...

:goodjob: M

That's the spirit! Keep fighting - I too was very tempted by my half full box of wine down in the basement. Weekends scare me so bad that this morning, I poured it all out. Going out to dinner with non-drinking friends tonight. The norm for me would have been to drink to get a buz before I went out to dinner. I don't want to be faced with that temptation. I know I will have a much better time w/o the AL.

Hang in there - you are doing an awesome job. Think back to where you were a couple of weeks ago and where you are now - progress is progress no matter how tiny the steps may be. Your body will thank you for it in the long run.

Have a wonderful Saturday!
:l
Jolie

[JackieClaire]

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M22,

If we all got it right the 1st,2nd,3rd......... time this place would be empty.

Just a quick :moon: kicking to keep you going 'til I get back later on.

J x

:l

[mollyka]

Here I go again...

M22 like Jackie says no one would be here if we all got it right first go. You did well stopping at two well done I couldn't do that. Today is a new day
Good luck
Molly

[northerngirl]

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Hi Everybody

:new:

I'm brand new to MWO and I'm scared and hopeful. I've finally been beaten into a state of reasonableness, as they say. I've got a head full of slogans from years in and out of a traditional recovery program, but it just hasn't worked for me.

And so I swallowed my pride, confessed to my Doc about my drinking problem, and asked for Topamax. This is my third day on it. I bought a health food store amino acid complex, and today I ordered MWO's hypno CD's, kudzu, L-glut, and milk thistle. I already take a bunch of high quality vits and supps; now I need to get off my butt and exercise! Maybe watching these Olympics will help, eh?

Any, thank you all for being here for me!

[sunshine_gg]

Here I go again...

Welcome Northerngirl!

Why don't you start your own thread in 'Just starting out'?
You'll get many welcoming replies and will get to know some more people here.

You might also want to fly by the Newbie's Nest... either way, glad you found this forum!

[greeneyes]

Here I go again...

Fantastic, northerngirl!!! Big welcome to you!

[mama bear]

Here I go again...

M22....YOU GO GIRL....be strong and I will be thinking of you...like every one else here I was (am) an every other night drunk.......everyone's words really move me and let me know I am not alone......
Go enjoy your families and love your life

[M22]

Here I go again...

Start over!!!

Hello all,
I have not posted because I lapsed this weekend. The more I think of it, the more upset I got then I started thinking in another perspective. Ever since I started this site I have done 2AF. Also, I've learned and held the willpower to have a glass or 2 not 4 or 5 that I normally would. Last night I had one glass and was in bed by 8:30. I was able to wake up early and be at work this morning at 6:30a.m. So instead of beating myself up I am going to look back at my accomplishments wipe myself off and keep it moving to better and bigger things starting today. I know that we are suppose to just look at it "at the moment "but I am actually looking forward to continuing what I started. I am going to complete at 3AF.
Starting today.
Who's with me!!!
Talk to you in a little while.
Millie
:eeks:

[mama bear]

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Mille...
I am with you all the way girl. I made it three days and lapsed.....BAD.......
my goal is 30AF...wanna do it together?

[sisley]

Here I go again...

let's do it together

You bet cha, MB..let's start our first day tomorrow, eh??:thanks: