I went into town and ended up doing shots after bingeing heavily on Brandy... went back to my apartment (I had a friend staying) and i blacked out, resulting in me being violent and woke in the morning with a vague recall of throwing him out...
I was so hungover and felt terrible in the morning... i have just learned that during the fight i broke his nose and gave him a black eye... i am mortified because i am the most gentlest and kind person ever sober.
I have emailed apology twice but because of me and my drinking i have lost a friend for good.
I usually drink once a week/fortnight but lately have been more indulgent, depressed and even had fleeting suicidal thoughts...
Still in bed on day 2 and starting to feel somewhat human again but i have joined here because i am through and i need support to start over... i can't be a 'normal' drinker, Lord knows i have tried enough times...
I am so depressed and full of remorse and so ashamed i can't even begin to describe... what i did to my friend was unforgiveable... i just received a text that simply said:
No wonder you have no friends.
I hate myself.
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