almost 2 days without even a nip!

[mama bear]

almost 2 days without even a nip!

Dogs are the best....they love you no matter what....no judgement,no criticism...

[Funny Girl]

almost 2 days without even a nip!

So true MB - but I will say that sometimes when I was drunk, they would give me 'the look' . . . .

[Doggygirl]

almost 2 days without even a nip!

:goodjob: Bell on 2 AF days!

On honesty in general and husbands in particular......

One thing I have learned in sobriety is that I need to always be aware of my real motives. When I was drinking, I not only lied to others on a regular basis (how many drinks I had, etc.) but I also lied A LOT to myself.

When I first decided to stop drinking, I too did not talk to my husband about it. I told myself it was because I didn't want him to know about the problem. TRUTH?????? I didn't want to open the discussion because it would further commit me to NOT DRINKING if I put the problem on the table. My husband KNEW how much I drank and KNEW it was a problem. It was the white elephant in the room.

I was kidding myself. I'm not saying you are doing that too - I don't know. I just offer it up as food for thought.

If you really want to quit, and your husband is supportive, then I encourage you to be honest about it. This journey will be MUCH MUCH easier with his full support, and with the booze out of the house, at least in the early stages.

If he doesn't know you have a problem, and doesn't know how much you drink, why does he hide the bottle?

:l Strength and hope to you for a great Day 3!

DG

[the bellinator]

almost 2 days without even a nip!

All--I will keep you posted on my conversation with my hubby. Whether he knows about the problem or not (I tend to think he does--why hide the whiskey and call and check up on me???)........he is enabling me by buying the poison, even if he hides it. He is awesome, my kids have commented they are "worried" about me (ages 13 & 14), and I have one very adorable little black dog that truly seems to know I'm killing myself with alcohol! She gives me that look too! I have so much support.......now the ball is in my court!

Love you all even though I don't know you. Thanks so much!

[mama bear]

almost 2 days without even a nip!

Hi Bells....I went all week AF and then had some wine with dinner on my Saturday night date with Papa Bear.
I woke up with a headache and cried to hubby that I had blown it. He had an "AHA" moment and I could see in his eyes that he just realized how serious I was. He apologized for ordering the wine, etc, etc
I am rambling I know, but the point I guess I am trying to make is that good hubbies are the best support while fighting this battle. My kids worry about me too. Even though I am not an every day drinker ( sounds like an copout doesn;t it?) when I do drink, i drink too much. I assured him he was not responsible for my behavior, but it made me feel good that he felt bad....sick, huh?:H
Hang in there and I hope hubby is supportive.....I am sure he will be.

[Funny Girl]

almost 2 days without even a nip!

Hey MB - I think it's great that your hubby acknowledges that there may be ways for him to make it easier for you. Let him help! It's fab. . . . .

Bell, the dog probably does know. There's a wonderful book called "The Art of Racing in the Rain". Get it. It's told from the dog's point of view & it's a wonderful read - good thing to get lost in & forget about having a drink for a minute. (make sure you have a few tissues handy . . .it's not sad, but you'll need them for some parts . . .)

[mama bear]

almost 2 days without even a nip!

I LOVED THAT BOOK!!!!!!
Just went and bought "Drinking......A Love Story" by Caroline Knapp and "Wishful Drinking" by Carrie Fisher
Someone mentioned them here....

[Funny Girl]

almost 2 days without even a nip!

MB - I read 'drinking, a love story' - never read Carrie's book. The Art of Racing in the Rain was wonderful wasn't it?? I've loaned it to a friend & recommended it to many. There's so much in it - many real life lessons. I'll be reading it again, I'm sure . . . .

[the bellinator]

almost 2 days without even a nip!

feb is the month

:thanks:

OverIt2007;813546 wrote: I am with Hoping for the Best, my new years resolutions went down the toilet, but for some reason my February is looking bright!

Are you ready for your sobriety? If you really truely deeply passionately want it now, then hold on for the NEW journey of freedom with your friends on here!

Over! I am ready for my sobriety! I am 40 years old, in the worst shaped of my life....I have to make some changes. February will be our month! Keep in touch!:h

[mama bear]

almost 2 days without even a nip!

your post made me go to the What We're Reading section here.....some good stuff....check it out

why do the doggies always to die?

[KatieB]

almost 2 days without even a nip!

(sorry not sure how to quote, but DG said this in a previous post):

"One thing I have learned in sobriety is that I need to always be aware of my real motives. When I was drinking, I not only lied to others on a regular basis (how many drinks I had, etc.) but I also lied A LOT to myself."

DG - you speak so much sense, I feel you are the rational part of my brain talking sometimes! :H I also lied so much to myself.. I kidded myself that I didn't have a problem with AL.. I kept blaming the depression.. but when the depression went, the problem with AL was still there! It's only now I can look back and see how much I lied to myself.. one of the first steps to a happy life is not to do this, and understand yourself.. sorry, Bell.. I just felt I had to comment here.. again, not saying you are doing this - only you know yourself and your attitude towards AL,

Wishing you the best,
K xx

[Doggygirl]

almost 2 days without even a nip!

Yes KatieB - it took me quite awhile to really own up to all the lying I did to myself and others, without being defensive about it and without trying to "justify" it. What helped me to see a better way was listening to others talk about it - others who are on the same journey just a bit ahead of me on this path of ours.

I'm grateful I don't have to live like that any more - weaving a web of lies in some way or another. That was a HUGE feeder for the guilt and remorse.

Changing my ways has been very freeing! You can have that freedom too!

DG

[KatieB]

almost 2 days without even a nip!

DG - I love that word "justify"; my ex said that's what I did all the time.. "I am drinking b/c its a party", "I'm allowed to have a drink because i've not had one for 2 days" etc. etc.. a sure sign that someone (ME, back then!) has a problem with AL.. I felt so guilty all the time as I knew deep inside that I had a problem, but refused to admit it to myself.. even going to the bottle shop, I always felt sure the servers could see inside my head and know about my drinking problem..
Now it feels so much more liberating to not lie to myself, and know where my drinking problems lie.. its a positive step to not repeating the mistakes of the past..
Sorry, Bell, didn't mean to HJ your thread! :H

K xx

[Doggygirl]

almost 2 days without even a nip!

KatieB;814045 wrote: .. even going to the bottle shop, I always felt sure the servers could see inside my head and know about my drinking problem..

OK - more thread jacking! But I have to share a :H in case you haven't seen it discussed yet.

I used to think I was the ONLY person on earth who went to multiple liquor stores so the clerks would not think I drank as much as I did. And then when I WOULD be buying quite a bit (say, enough just for ME but for a 3 day weekend) I would make comments like "oh we're having a party this weekend!" (see? the web of lies - really stupid lies I wove!)

Imagine my SHOCK when I came to My Way Out and realized that many many many of us did this. :H:H:H And here I thought I was being so sneaky. The clerks at the stores must roll their eyes at our BS!!

OK - back to Bells thread now but just had to share that in case you did that too...

DG

[Funny Girl]

almost 2 days without even a nip!

Jeez - I used to do that "spread the purchase around" thing too . . . .I was soooo sneaky - always 'undercover' . . . .Glad to hear I'm not original!