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    #1

    Your opinion on my drinking

    Hey there, I was hoping to get some help on my drinking. I know I have a problem with it and yes, I want to stop.

    I used to smoke weed everyday, and since I stopped I started drinking to 'fill the void'. At the time I thought I'd drink just to help me get to sleep...but it's been 10 months since then and I've probably avoided drinking alcohol for probably 10 days sporadically at most.

    Some characteristics of my drinking are:

    a) I drink every night, except when I'm stressed about an exam and know I can't drink. (I don't drink during the day)
    b) I've stopped for maybe 3 days straight, but eventually I start up again..and all of a sudden it's a week straight drinking.
    c) I hide the drinking from others.
    d) I likely drink the equivalent to a 26er every 3 days.


    So am I am a so called alcoholic? Do I need help? (I don't particularly think I need help to stop, but that's what most addicts say..and I said the same thing about weed). I also hold the idea that any help I'll get is in some 12-step AA group..something I really would like to avoid.

    Thanks for reading! And for any advice!
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    #2
    Your opinion on my drinking

    The fact that you even have to ask the question indicates that you have an issue/problem with drinking or more likely addiction in general. People who don't, do whatever they want & never think about it - they have a drink & then can take it or leave it. They don't think about it all the time. The minute you start hiding your drinking you definitely have a problem & it will most likely keep escalating if you're like most people. If you think you don't need help to stop, then just stop. If you can't make it more than 3 days, then you need help, don't you?

    This board has been a great source of support for me & for many others. I would download the book - it's about $12. There's a lot of information there & on the forum here, many can offer various ideas on what has worked for them. everyone is different & AA isn't necessarily the only way - it does work for many, but there are a variety of solutions.

    Good luck.

    Comment

      #3
      Your opinion on my drinking

      Hello Clutch,

      Welcome to MWO!!

      Have you given some thought to what 'the void' is that you need to fill. Are you refering to filling time, is 'the void' an emotional issue/s that you are not dealing with?

      I think a lot of people drink/drug to avoid uncomfortable feelings and use it as a way to 'relax'.

      Unfortunately for some people it becomes a habit, then the amounts consumed progressively get bigger.

      If you are hiding your drinking it is because you know it would look like a lot to others. I hid mine from my partner because I knew it was totally excessive and I did not want to be challenged on it. Plus, when you hide it, I reckon the amounts get bigger - quicker!

      Stick around and read / post. Let us know how you get on.
      Amelia

      Sober since 30/06/10

      Comment

        #4
        Your opinion on my drinking

        hi clutch and all. reading on here shows that people drink in lots of different ways and quantities. i was drinking most days.... always to excess, in that i pass out, felt shit the next day, thinking changed, bad thoughts etc etc. i think the fact that we found this place and are here says that we know we have a problem that needs to be addressed in whatever way is right for us. keep with us, keep reading and you will know what is right for you. love and hugs to everyone here xxxx
        Today is the tomorrow i worried about yesterday and it turned out fine
        Keep passing the open windows

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          #5
          Your opinion on my drinking

          also, i have thought about taking to weed as a void filler (have dabbled with it but never got into it). that would be just plain stupid for me as i would be subsituting one drug for another so im gonna stick it out just finding the real sober me, straight me
          Today is the tomorrow i worried about yesterday and it turned out fine
          Keep passing the open windows

          Comment

            #6
            Your opinion on my drinking

            Clutch, everyone here will have their own opinion on your drinking. The only opinion that counts though is yours! If your honest with yourself then you'll know what's your truth rather than a collective one of members here.

            Listen to what your intuition is telling you. For me that's normally the quite voice of reasoning that I want so hard to fight against.

            Love and Light
            Phil
            xx
            "Keep me away from the wisdom which does not cry, the philosophy which does not laugh and the greatness which does not bow before children." Kahlil Gibran
            Clean and sober 25th January 2009

            Comment

              #7
              Your opinion on my drinking

              Clutch,

              I wouldn't say you're an "alcoholic" (whatever that means), but I would say that you're in the early stages of a drinking pattern that is risky. Many people drink like you do in their youth, and unfortunately there's no telling who among them will develop a serious problem. One way to attempt to get a handle on things is to quit for an extended period of time. Since you don't think that would be too difficult for you, it's worth consideration.

              Secondly, if you do feel that you require some outside assistance to stop, please don't assume that AA is the only game in town. That's a myth. In addition to this website (where you'll find many AA alternatives to quitting drinking), there's SOS (Secular Organization for Sobriety) and RR (Rational Recovery). In short, there are lots of options.

              I hope you find the information you were looking for.

              Comment

                #8
                Your opinion on my drinking

                Hi Clutch,

                Welcome to MWO, this is a good place where you will find a lot of support & answers to your questions.
                Your opinion is the only one that counts. If you feel that you may have a problem & want to take care of it - then by all means do so!

                Download & read the MWO book from the Health store, it's full of info about the program & it's components. You'll have to make a good plan for yourself addressing your personal needs. Look in the Tool box (located the the Monthly Abstinence section) for good ideas.

                Wishing you the best on your journey, if you have any questions please just ask!

                Lav
                AF since 03/26/09
                NF since 05/19/09
                Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

                Comment

                  #9
                  Your opinion on my drinking

                  Hi Clutch and welcome.

                  I echo all the previous posts and add the following quote from the fantastic book JimBeam suggested for you - Rational Recovery..."It is fair at this early moment, though, to say that if you suspect you have a drinking or drug problem, you probabaly do."
                  I too did not want to go down the AA path and have found this site, Roberta Jewels book and the book above to be a fantastic way to get to where I want to. I wont lie to you and say it is easy however if you are willing to put in some effort, the results are amazing and so worth the effort.
                  The support you will receive from the people here is amazing. No-one judges you and has probably been were you have and where you are now.
                  Good luck with your journey which ever way you decide.
                  Hippy Chick
                  I finally got it!
                  "All that we are is the result of what we have thought. The mind is everything. What we think, we become" Buddah

                  Comment

                    #10
                    Your opinion on my drinking

                    I just wanted to say thank-you for all the great answers! I'm going to take time to go through them all. What I can say, after reading them briefly, that:

                    1)I did substitute one drug for another (weed to alcohol). I think I've narrowed the void down to a 'fear of the unknown'; where I just get very, very buzzed any way I can to stop worring about problems rather than facing them.
                    2) I've done a lot of research and feel I'm not an alcoholic, but definitely have been involved in a year long pattern of drinking. Specific characteristics make me know I have a problem
                    3) Last night was the first night in a long time I didn't drink..and what a difference it is in the morning. I felt physically better (obviously, without the hangover etc.), more motivated and wanted to eat more healthily throughout the day. So tonight is the second night

                    My issue is maintenace of my life to avoid ingesting the drink. I haven't been sober for a week in an extremely long time..so that's my first goal.

                    Thanks again and I'll be sticking to these threads.

                    Comment

                      #11
                      Your opinion on my drinking

                      Coming out here to talk to people helps. Whatever your personal goal, I hope you achieve it!

                      Comment

                        #12
                        Your opinion on my drinking

                        Welcome Clutch,
                        I agree with everything said before and yes I think if we think we have a problem we probably have.
                        Amelia I also agree that hiding drinks is a very good indicator that all is not well in the world and also that when you start hiding you drink more - how many times did I gulp down that triple vodka in my cupboard really quick cos I didn't want anyone to know what I was doing! Yuck.
                        Anyway Clutch, I'm sure there's nothing wrong with AA sounds brill for lots of people but there ARE alternatives and this is a great place, keep posting
                        Molly
                        Contentedly sober since 27/12/2011
                        contentedly NF since 8/04/14

                        Comment

                          #13
                          Your opinion on my drinking

                          Just a quick WELCOME to you, Clutch! Good that you've made a goal...

                          And had to also say: COOL PIC, HIPPIE!
                          Sometimes you have to take the leap and build your wings on the way down... Anais Nin

                          Comment

                            #14
                            Your opinion on my drinking

                            Hi Clutch,
                            Good for you for not drinking - it all starts with the first step. I know with my drinking/drug taking it was also to cover unpleasant feelings and i did this for many years. What i am finding out now that i am sober for the longer period i have ever been for 6 years is yes there are unpleasant feelings, there is loniness, there is stress but that they are emotions that every human being has. Now i dont hide from them i sit with them and expect them and they do pass. The more sober time you have you will start to work through them. Start reading, asking questions and day by day you will feel stronger.
                            All the best x
                            Liquid MISERY guaranteed to distroy.

                            Comment

                              #15
                              Your opinion on my drinking

                              I think that what is important here is to realize that you are feeling better without drinking alcohol. that you are an alcoholic or a problem is not the issue at hand, just that one way is better for you than the other. The evenings are only a few hours. Why screw up the whole day and night for a few hours in the evenings? Some people say that it takes a month to create a new habit. By then, you will not care about AL anymore and will really enjoyed your newly founded life. Your spirit will be way higher. Good luck.

                              Comment

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