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    #1

    Back Where I started

    I was going to post this in the newbie nest, but it seemed to get longer


    I guess I'll start back in here:l

    Today was suppoed to be AF2 again but as my friend says I kind of fell into my wine glass again this afternoon.... (she is so supportive it's untrue but she knows exactly what I'm well what we're all going through). I'm still so disappointed in myself, I did 30 AF days this year the longest I've ever done, but I stopped taking my supps had one wine and tried to moderate to disasterous effects after that...

    I know I need to get started again but I'm finding it so hard to stop this cycle again.. Yesterday was okay as I was sooo hungover from the day before, but today because I knew I wouldn't be able to drink to excess with my h/b at home and not being able to go and buy my spare bottle I had a supposed one glass.. which is now one bottle and I'm already worrying about there being nothing to drink after I finish this glass...


    I just wish I had the guts to go to my doctor and ask for help, but I just can't do it, I'm too scared to walk in there and do it...
    WHAT CAN I SAY? I DON'T WANT TO PLAY ANYMORE..


    Just taking it day by day.......
    Tags: None
    #2
    Back Where I started

    Hi there,

    If I can ask, what about walking into your Dr frightens you? I had to come clean with mine. I asked him if people like me made him angry. He said no, just sad.

    Drs are there to help us. This problem afflicts so many and they are used to seeing it.

    Don't be afraid to ask for help. :l

    AD

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      #3
      Back Where I started

      Hi Leaveinsilence,
      Why don't you try one of the meds? You can buy online like many on this site do. I find Antabuse helps a lot during the first days your mind ( and that little voice) knows that you just can't drink.
      make the least of the worst, and the most of the best - everyday.

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        #4
        Back Where I started

        do you have any idea how many doctors are alcoholics???? NEVER BE AFRAID to ask for HELP......
        I love my family more than alcohol.:h
        Live in the Solution....not the problem

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          #5
          Back Where I started

          I don't know, I mean I know I should, I'm just talking to one of my closest friends now and she's asking me exactly the same question, so I know I should. But I don't know, it's sooo stupid I know the help is there but I'm so frightened about getting someone else involved you know, I wondered about buying Antabuse online but my h/b questions everything that gets delivered, plus what gets spent, when I bought my supps it was easy he questioned them and I said they were vits... the crazy thing is if I went to my GP I wouldn't have to pay for it.

          God I sound so pathetic and like I'm making excuses, I guess I'm just so mad with myself I did it before and I know I should ask for help, but I know that my h/b will just be waiting for me to fail again..... last time I had hardly any support from him and then he got angry with me the first night I had a couple of glasses of wine...
          WHAT CAN I SAY? I DON'T WANT TO PLAY ANYMORE..


          Just taking it day by day.......

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            #6
            Back Where I started

            Hi Leave,
            Welcome home

            I was terrified when I walked into my doctors surgery on 7/7/09 and had to admit yet again that I had failed in my many attempts to get sober. He was wonderful and has been a huge support for not only me but my husband too. I can now make an appointment just to talk over my progress.

            Would you friend be willing to go with you for a bit of moral support? I'm sure the doctor would rather see you now than further down the line when things get really out of hand.

            Please,please don't even think about the antabuse until you have talked it over with a medical professional. It can be highly dangerous if not taken correctly.

            J x

            :l
            It could be worse, I could be filing.
            AF since 7/7/2009

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              #7
              Back Where I started

              Dear Leave, please get help now from your Dr before this progresses. In the mean time we are here to listen, support, and offer whatever help we can.

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                #8
                Back Where I started

                Hi Leave,

                Glad you are back! I think the last time I saw you post you were getting ready to go to London for a day? Am I right about that?
                I'm sorry things didn't go as planned but it's never too late to hop back on board & start again. Not many people are able to quit on the first try or two. A sober life is worth the effort, no matter how many times you have to restart!
                Revise your plan, make sure you have 'all your ducks in a row' & try again, you won't be sorry.

                Come back to the Newbies Nest, let us know how you are doing!
                You can do this - we are all here to support you!

                Lav
                AF since 03/26/09
                NF since 05/19/09
                Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

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