Things you've thought you needed to be UTI to do
Ok. I don't think of myself as socially adept, but this one is easy. I have to do this for work periodically when I meet with dealers or trade show people. Nothing is more fun than facing three hours of evening "trade show time" noshing with a bunch of over 40s business people in varying states of inebriation.
First, forget about 39 of the 40 people. You can get to them later.
Second, look at whoever is near you. Pick out one part of their appearance. Ask them a complimentary question about it:
For a smart dresser: "That's a stunning dress! Where did you find it?", Long hair "Oh my God your hair is amazing. How do you do it?. Old: "You look so wise. How do you approach events like this?" You get the picture.
Go for the ones looking awkward and standing alone. You'll get a fast friend. But take a break after a few minutes and move on. Once you get a knack, and with the right eye for other people ready to move, you can get through a room in about half an hour, and be on warm fuzzies with 10-12 people by that point. The key is to keep people talking about themselves (everyone's favorite topic) and avoid any sort of long story or personal monolog.
And as well noted for politics, religion and money, say nothing. People will think you are very wise when you say nothing. Save these topics for your spouse and your friends. For strangers, clothes, hair, food, jobs are all good. Vacations, travel, teen memories, music, movies, all good as long as they don't touch on the forbidden three. If they do, don't take the opening. Just skate on by and pick up a tidbit you remember from earlier. So when they say "It's all because of Obamacare", respond with "You said you went to Brown in the 70s? That must have been quite a happening place at that time!".
I find it all much easier when sober. I remember tidbits better, and that helps me jump to the next question.
For private parties I bring my own sparkling cider or sparkling pear juice, which looks just like wine in a glass. For hosted bars, they usually offer AF alternatives, just ask. I carry my own splenda (pellets) and recently stevia. This is a non calorie sweetener. I find this vastly improves the taste, at least for me.
Good luck.
Ok. I don't think of myself as socially adept, but this one is easy. I have to do this for work periodically when I meet with dealers or trade show people. Nothing is more fun than facing three hours of evening "trade show time" noshing with a bunch of over 40s business people in varying states of inebriation.
First, forget about 39 of the 40 people. You can get to them later.
Second, look at whoever is near you. Pick out one part of their appearance. Ask them a complimentary question about it:
For a smart dresser: "That's a stunning dress! Where did you find it?", Long hair "Oh my God your hair is amazing. How do you do it?. Old: "You look so wise. How do you approach events like this?" You get the picture.
Go for the ones looking awkward and standing alone. You'll get a fast friend. But take a break after a few minutes and move on. Once you get a knack, and with the right eye for other people ready to move, you can get through a room in about half an hour, and be on warm fuzzies with 10-12 people by that point. The key is to keep people talking about themselves (everyone's favorite topic) and avoid any sort of long story or personal monolog.
And as well noted for politics, religion and money, say nothing. People will think you are very wise when you say nothing. Save these topics for your spouse and your friends. For strangers, clothes, hair, food, jobs are all good. Vacations, travel, teen memories, music, movies, all good as long as they don't touch on the forbidden three. If they do, don't take the opening. Just skate on by and pick up a tidbit you remember from earlier. So when they say "It's all because of Obamacare", respond with "You said you went to Brown in the 70s? That must have been quite a happening place at that time!".
I find it all much easier when sober. I remember tidbits better, and that helps me jump to the next question.
For private parties I bring my own sparkling cider or sparkling pear juice, which looks just like wine in a glass. For hosted bars, they usually offer AF alternatives, just ask. I carry my own splenda (pellets) and recently stevia. This is a non calorie sweetener. I find this vastly improves the taste, at least for me.
Good luck.
Thanks!
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