I drank and I am ashamed

[mama bear]

I drank and I am ashamed

Ditto on the bitches......F them!!!! Trust me...they have issues too!!!!

[Anotherday]

I drank and I am ashamed

dancelot;826249 wrote: Sounds like a bunch of bitches! Sometimes I find those type things, and some Internet forums, like Junior High lunchrooms (or worse gym class locker rooms!). I'm glad you come here - you are an intelligent, thoughtful individual.

Bless your heat and :l to you. Yeah, they seemed sort of like a bunch of biatches to me too. And I don't know why, as none of them were "all that."

Dancelot, I am just going to have to figure out how to appreciate good people like you and everyone else at MWO and learn how to blow off bad people. It would be so wonderful to meet all of you IRL and have a picnic or BBQ with you! But I know it's not possible. At least we all have each other via this forum. I'm amazed that so many good people have found their way to this ONE forum on the Net. It's a real blessing.

I just have to deal with my fears and, as my father told me, get a thicker skin. I am far too sensitive to rejection and I pick up on non verbal cues way too easily.

[Rusty]

I drank and I am ashamed

AD,

I have suffered all the same things you have....my father told me to get a thicker skin too and that I'm way too sensitive. Hell, I know I am....I just have to learn not to take things personally because most people aren't personal at all....especially in the business world. As for the group of loud-mouth women...at first when you told me you were removed from the group I thought it was from a credible, decent group of people. An acquaintance who was in AA told me not to waste your time being angry at people who reject you or treat you badly. They take up space in your brain and they get your time for free! I try to remember that. I now think to myself when that happens, and it happens fairly often...."if you're going to piss me off this much then I'm sending you a bill because you're a pain in the ass. Why should I give you any of my time. MY time is more valuable than you are!"

AD, the truth is, when you think about those catty, loud mouth women, they really aren't thinking about you at all so why even think about them? They're totally useless. THEY are not good enough for YOU.

Sending you positive thoughts for a better tomorrow,

Rusty

[Anotherday]

I drank and I am ashamed

mama bear;826250 wrote: OH HONEY...stop beating yourself up. Drink some water and eat and start over,. I am so glad you posted. I have fallen down so many times since i started in February and right now I have the fat lip to prove it. It will click at some point and you have been doing great. Just keep on keeping on and know that we are all here for you. I am sorry you feel so horrible, but guilt is useless. Maybe you should try internet dating like Katie B is?????

Oh, Mama. No way. The last guy I met on the Internet was hunted down valley-wide and featured on our local news for being a criminal! Insert EEK icon here! I am lucky I didn't end up in a shallow grave, hence my concern and wishes that anyone be very careful on the Internet. This guy was smoking crack in the restaurant (I found this out after the fact) and my neighbors called the cops on me! I freaked out so much I checked myself into rehab and I am so not the kind of person that neighbors call cops on! All of this happened in a blackout, mind you. Cringing here. AL and men and me don't mix well AT ALL!

Thanks for your idea though!

[Anotherday]

I drank and I am ashamed

Rusty;826261 wrote: AD,

I have suffered all the same things you have....my father told me to get a thicker skin too and that I'm way too sensitive. Hell, I know I am....I just have to learn not to take things personally because most people aren't personal at all....especially in the business world. As for the group of loud-mouth women...at first when you told me you were removed from the group I thought it was from a credible, decent group of people. An acquaintance who was in AA told me not to waste your time being angry at people who reject you or treat you badly. They take up space in your brain and they get your time for free! I try to remember that. I now think to myself when that happens, and it happens fairly often...."if you're going to piss me off this much then I'm sending you a bill because you're a pain in the ass. Why should I give you any of my time. MY time is more valuable than you are!"

AD, the truth is, when you think about those catty, loud mouth women, they really aren't thinking about you at all so why even think about them? They're totally useless. THEY are not good enough for YOU.

Sending you positive thoughts for a better tomorrow,

Rusty

Thanks, Rusty. I guess maybe we problem drinkers are a sensitive bunch. That's my theory anyway. I think at times we drink to deal with the injustices of life or just creepy people.

Women can be catty and I hate when that happens. Men seem to be less this way. I think KatieB mentioned something about women having lower self esteem in one of her posts or wondering about it. Maybe it's true.

At any rate, chin up and all of that other good stuff. I know I'm talking to people who get the guilt and shame of drinking - how we are fundamentally and most likely more decent people than the rest, yet we have an achilles heel called AL. May we all beat it and go on to lead happy and healthy lives! We are here today posting and fighting the good fight!

AD

[Coco-Nut]

I drank and I am ashamed

Anotherday;826213 wrote: Honestly, I was treated like I was a piece of poop. It got to the point where I felt so bad over my hair, what I was wearing, my weight, everything.

Then to make matters worse after being snubbed like that the organizer sent me an email telling me I did not fit in and was being removed from the group. :upset:

Dude who ARE these people??? In my estimation, THEY are the ones who should feel ashamed. I'm not sure what kind of a group we are talking about - not only making a newcomer feel badly - but then to follow it up with an email???? Yikes.

You should be glad you don't fit in with them, luv. (And next time you see one of them, just say :biteme:

Off you do - cheer up, dust yourself off - today is "Anotherday" - and it's always cathartic to start anew on a Monday, isn't it? Now smile - we all love you!

[KatieB]

I drank and I am ashamed

Hi Anotherday,
I've seen my name mentioned a couple of times in this thread! lol..
It seems like all the other comments have given you a better perspective on all this.. i think its true that a lot of ppl that turn to AL are sensitive people - and I am very similar to you in "picking up" on non-verbal cues and using this as a way to put myself down - though a lot of the time these "cues" turn out to be false.. part of my BPD is black/white thinking, which might be what you do too.. just being aware of this can be enough to get you through these situations.. I hope you are still seeing your counsellor and getting help with your low self-esteem issues.. I think a number of things came into play here.. the fact that you felt so self-conscious without AL, led you to BELIEVE that you did not fit in.. its a self-fulfilling prophecy - you believed you would not fit in, so you kind of "made" yourself not fit in - the other women (women are more likely to pick up on negative vibes as they were probably struggling with low self esteem themselves) picked up on that, nothing to do with you at all.. so I really hope you get some help with your low self-esteem which seems to be at the root of everything, which is the same with me.. as for the AL.. we are all human and all learning.. you had heaps of AF time under your belt, so you know you can do this, you just need to find that inner strength and motivation again; dont let those other women get you down, they don't know you - you know you are a kind, caring and compassionate person.. unfortunately there are a lot of judgemental ppl in the world too quick to put down others as they are dealing with their own struggles in life..
take care,
Katie xxx

[Farm Girl]

I drank and I am ashamed

Anotherday, these people are not worth a second thought. If they send you an email saying they are removing you from the group, that is a group you don't want any parts of. Sorry for telling you to work the room, maybe work them over :} should have been better advice! We all make mistakes - and life is hard - so don't beat yourself up. Today is a new day and a new opportunity ! Yesterday is already over and you can't change it anyway!

[KatieB]

I drank and I am ashamed

Farm Girl;826305 wrote: . Sorry for telling you to work the room, maybe work them over :} should have been better advice! !

LOL FG!. We will help you work them over AD! xxx :H

[Anotherday]

I drank and I am ashamed

You know, if I were not feeling wiped out, which I am, I would comment on what each of you said. Know you are loved by me and so appreciated. :h

I have learned that it doesn't take much to completely derail my progress. I missed school tonight. I just could not force myself to go. AL makes me not care about my responsibiliites. Physically I was just not well and I had to sleep. Mentally I can feel what it did to my mood. I almost feel like not participating here so much but that is probably a danger sign and a bad way to be thinking.

Well, back to bed but I wanted to thank you all again.

AD