Start Here!

[rubywillow]

I've been in and out lately, but really reading today a lot of new posts. Sometimes, having been here a while, I forget what it felt like when I first came here. I started out by posting in the middle of an ongoing thread, which had nothing to do with newbies! I was embarressed, since I hadn't been lurking long enough to understand how the system worked. It's now closing in on 2 years, so my mistake wasn't terminal! I've found people over this time who joined in on ongoing threads, and help them find places more suited to them, but it WOULD be nice to understand how things go when we first show up, scared and unsure of what to expect. I'd like to issue a welcome to anyone out there, lurking or afraid to find a starting place. Come in from the cold, post whatever you feel, and someone will help you find the best place for you. I've found this is a wonderful place, a haven from the terrors we put ourselves through because of AL (alcohol). I posted drinking, sober, in between, but because of the lovely people here, sober SO much more in the last year plus! You have to ask for help, for your particular question, and it is SO much nicer when you establish a relationship with people here, even though your heart may be broken by them down the road if they 'slip'. It's the COMING BACK that is important, the realizing what has happened, the asking for the specific help you need. First of all, never think you are unique in your drinking pattern. Someone has been there, done that. Second, never think you are unique in being able to overcome your problem, since someone has been there and done JUST that. Until you feel ready, just for yourself, you aren't going to succeed. But when you ARE ready, there is SO MUCH HELP here. I hope this helps at least one person who has questioned themselves about posting on this site. You can find help navigating (which drove me nuts!) and find the right place, group, for you, but you HAVE to speak. For all of you out there, I understand. If you REALLY want to stop, to get better, to live the life you were intended, start here, or somewhere on a thread. Don't wait. I know too many stories of those who wait. For me, it was life or death. Don't wait that long, or until you have to expose yourself to those you love, and rebuild their trust. It has finally worked for me, but I don't wish that pain on anyone. Come in from the cold. There is hope here.

[rived]

Start Here!

Thanks, Ruby! I appreciate your help/suggestions!

Peace & Love, RE

[mama bear]

Start Here!

Thanks Rubes.Love the new picture....

[sick of being sick]

Start Here!

WELCOME ALL OF YOU! We are so happy you found this site. You found a great family of love, understanding, support and encouragement. I could have never made it without this site. I always started drinking vodka at 5:00 every day and didn't stop until I passed out. I had to change my schedule. Now instead of drinking, I am here on this site from 5:00 till I go to bed or either reading the book "The Easy Way to Quit Drinking" by Allen Carr. I would highly recommend everyone to read it. It changes your whole attitude about alcohol. Alcohol is poison and every time we drink it, we die a little bit more, physically and emotionally. Just never look back and beat yourself up over your past and never worry about tomorrow. Just focus totally on today. Just get through this one day without drinking alcohol. Every time you deny a craving, it gets weaker and you get stronger. Pretty soon you will begin to feel better and your journey will get easier, but if you do fall, it is so important for you to get right back up and try again. No one will ever judge you in here. We are all here for one purpose...to get and stay sober. We all try to help one another on this journey together. Best of luck and love to all of you!
__________________

[rubywillow]

Start Here!

Great posts, everyone! Keep 'em coming!

[runningwind]

Start Here!

Ruby, thank you so much for this post. I too being a newbie , have not been able to reach out to others on my own issues. I guess in some way it is easier too focus on others so that you don't have to look at yourself. This is a hard area for me and I hope in the not too far future I will be able to share my story but until then I will incorporate this post into my action plan too stay sober. I will make a promise to myself too try and reach out for help when I need it. Wonderful post,
runningwind

[fennel]

Start Here!

Thanks for the very helpful advice!

[Guest]

Start Here!

Hi Rubes,

A lovely message. I ended up here as I googled "I drink a bottle of wine a night" and ended up posting on a thread that was a year old. Luckily, I was "found" and given a twig and directions to the Newbies Nest.

Maybe, we can look out for Newbies who do this and help them get into the right places.

Thanks all for your help. I have been hanging around since the end of Jan. I have had so many more AF days thanks to you guys and I am now on day 8 of this run. Long may it continue.

Spam xx

[fennel]

Start Here!

Spam;826379 wrote: Hi Rubes,

A lovely message. I ended up here as I googled "I drink a bottle of wine a night" and ended up posting on a thread that was a year old. Luckily, I was "found" and given a twig and directions to the Newbies Nest.

LOL! I got here by googling "I will not drink tonight" and ended up on a thread that was older, too! Then, I took a little look around and thought the place looked pretty darned cool!

[JackieClaire]

Start Here!

Hey Rubes,
Love this thread.
I joined here on 5th Sept 2008 and didn't make my 1st post until 8th July 2009. I have no idea where I plonked myself.
I had no idea what a smilie, an emoticon, an avatar was. I didn't know how to start thread. I couldn't understand why labour was spelled labor.
But once I started to post I worked away learning a new little skill every day. I google the life out of things. I'm forever in the test forum.
One of the biggest things I've found is along side the sadness is also the humour/humor that can be found.
J x
:l:l

[Zeppie2]

Start Here!

Rubes - I remember when you were first here as I was a newbie too, having no idea of how things worked or was this site just a big fat hoax.

But two years on I am still here and loving every minute of it.

Great thread

[rubywillow]

Start Here!

Yes, Zep, it's funny how people have come in and out of our lives since we came here. That's something else I'd like to point out to new people; just because a group seem to all be close friends (and are!) doesn't mean new people aren't welcome. The greatest thing about this site is that everyone here has open arms and hearts. They have shared my troubles over the last 21 months like no one in my life ever has, EVER! For the first time I can be completely honest, without fear of judgement or someone 'not liking me'. So, don't be afraid to post on a thread you like the chatter on.

BTW, this site is divided into different sections - 'Just Starting Out', 'General Discusion', all the way down to 'Daily Life'. Each section is divided into 'threads' - posts started by members. You can post to any of these threads, or at the top of each section, you'll see 'post new thread' and here you can start your own thread. My suggestion to everyone new is to first go to the section 'Tell Us Your Story', and read the stories of members. Be prepared; many of them stay with you a long time. Read all throughout the site, even down to recipes and jokes. (Everyone needs a smile!) You'll soon begin to feel more at home here!

Almost forgot something VERY important: Under the 'GOALS' section, sub-section Mo. Abstain., the first thread is TOOL BOX. This will be very important in your plan, when you make it. Please, post any questions here, or the thread of your choice. Newbies Nest is a fabulous first stop!

[time2change]

Start Here!

I'd like to add that you should jump into the chat room. That was a huge step for me. I must have almost clicked into chat for weeks until I finally felt the courage to actually go into chat. I was lucky enough to "meet" some of the most wonderful people who have become true freinds. If the first time you go in there you find you are alone go back and you will eventually find someone in there. Sometimes they will be off the topic of alcohol but feel free to ask for help and everyone will be more than willing to chat with you. There is alot of fun in there too and as Ruby said everyone needs to smile.

[Guest]

Start Here!

Can everyone reading this thread rate it with lots of stars, please?

I think it's important that we keep this thread near the top so that the New Newbies can find out where to go next.

Spam xx

[rubywillow]

Start Here!

About chat: If you scroll all the way to the bottom on the page, you'll see 'Members Currently Using Chat', which will tell you if someone is in chat at the time. If you decide to join in, go back to the top of the page, and to the left, you'll see 'Live Chat'. Click that, you'll get an option for which way you want to view (I use the first), and 'bob's your uncle!' your in! If the group conversation is not what you need, speak up, ask for help, or double click on someone's name and you will have a private conversation with that person, not seen by anyone else.